WHERE SIN FEELS LIKE HOME

CHAPTER ONE : Seven Days

~Zella's POV~

I never thought I would sleep with my best friend's father. Not until everything fell apart first.

And I mean everything.

---

My phone buzzed against the desk just as I was stapling the last file closed, Brynn's name lighting up the screen like she had some kind of radar for the exact moment I was finally about to leave the office.

I picked up on the second ring.

"So you're telling me you're not flying in today." It wasn't a question. I already knew from her voice.

"Zella, I'm so sorry, my dad suspended my card again and he just approved it this afternoon, like literally an hour ago. I promise I'll be there in two days. Two days, okay? And guess what I'm doing right now?"

"You know I'm terrible at guessing."

"I'm standing in a shop picking out lingerie to gift you." She sounded obscenely proud of herself. "The good kind. Not the cute kind."

"Brynn."

"What? Do you understand how happy I am right now? My Mary mother of Jesus is finally getting married. I have been waiting for this since we were seventeen."

I laughed despite myself, leaning back in my chair and pressing my fingers against my eyes. The office was quiet around me, most of the staff already gone, the overhead lights doing that thing they do after six where they feel too bright and slightly sad at the same time.

"Yes, girlie. This is my dream wedding."

"It better be. Seven days, Zella. Seven. So why does it look like you're still at the office?"

I glanced around like she could see me. "How did you..."

"That wall behind you. I know that wall. I have seen that wall in every single one of your video calls for three years."

"I just had some files to finish. It's nothing."

"Cole told you to take the week off."

"Cole tells me a lot of things."

"Zella."

"I know, I know. I'm done, actually. I was literally just about to leave."

She made a sound that said she didn't fully believe me but was choosing to let it go. "Go home. Or better, go to Cole's. When is the last time you two just sat somewhere and did nothing?"

"I'm going there now actually. He's been off since morning and hasn't picked up any of my calls, I just want to make sure he's okay."

"That's sweet. Annoying, but sweet."

"Shut up."

"I love you. Make sure the bridesmaid dress fits, because I refuse to be squeezed into something on your wedding day."

"Bye, Brynn."

"Bye, love."

I held the phone against my chest for a second after the call ended. Brynn had been my best friend since secondary school, since the day she stood between me and a group of girls who had decided I was an easy target, arms folded, chin out, like she was twice their size and completely unbothered. We had been inseparable since that afternoon. She was the kind of person who showed up without being asked and stayed longer than you expected and somehow made everything feel like it was going to be fine even when it clearly wasn't.

I needed that right now. I didn't know why I needed it, exactly. Everything was fine. Everything was perfect, actually. My wedding was in seven days.

I packed up my bag, shut off my desk lamp, and left.

---

The drive to Cole's took twenty minutes and I spent most of it talking myself out of the tight feeling in my chest that had started the moment Brynn said go to Cole's like it was obvious, like it was the most natural thing in the world, and somehow that made me feel worse instead of better.

Six years. That was how long Cole and I had been together, since our second year of university, since a study group that neither of us actually studied in. By third year he had become the kind of constant I stopped noticing the edges of because he was simply always there. When I graduated with two job offers on the table he asked me to turn both of them down and come work for him instead. He didn't want the distance. I thought that was the most romantic thing anyone had ever said to me, so I said yes, and I had been his company manager for the three years since, keeping our relationship quiet at work because he didn't want people thinking I'd gotten the position because of him, and I didn't want that either.

Three months ago he got down on one knee at dinner and said I want to give you the day you've always dreamed about. My birthday is Christmas Day and I had wanted a Christmas wedding since I was old enough to know what wanting something felt like. I cried so hard I couldn't even say yes properly. He laughed and put the ring on anyway.

Seven days. Seven days and I would have everything I had ever wanted.

I turned into his street and immediately saw Dara's car.

It was parked just behind his, close to the kerb, silver and compact and completely familiar because I had seen it outside my aunt's house, outside family gatherings, outside the office building nearly every morning for the past year. My cousin Dara. Cole's personal assistant, a position she had begged me for and I had personally walked her into, because she needed the work and I trusted her completely and it never once occurred to me that those two things could become a problem.

She was supposed to be on a business trip. She was supposed to fly back tomorrow.

I sat in the car for a moment and didn't move.

'They're probably working.' That was the reasonable thought. Something came up with the trip, she flew back early, there was something urgent that needed handling in person. Cole hadn't picked up his phone because he was busy. That was all. That was the entire explanation and it was a perfectly good one and I needed to stop sitting here building something terrible out of nothing.

I got out of the car.

The front door was locked, which was strange. Cole never locked the front door when he knew I was coming, hadn't done it in three years, but I told myself the lock was probably playing up and went back to the car for the spare key I almost never used. The house was quiet when I stepped inside, sitting room dim, everything exactly where it always was, nothing out of place.

I went upstairs.

I didn't call his name. Some part of me already knew that calling out would only delay something that was coming regardless.

Each step felt heavier than the last. My hands had gone cold somewhere between the second and third stair and I couldn't feel my fingertips properly, which was strange because the house wasn't cold at all. I kept thinking 'stop, you're being ridiculous, stop' and my legs kept moving anyway, kept carrying me down the hall, kept bringing me closer to the door at the end of it.

The sounds reached me before I touched the handle.

I stood completely still in the hallway.

"Do you love it?" Cole's voice. Low. The way it gets when he thinks no one else can hear him.

"Yes.... fuck me harder."