Lahat ng Kabanata ng The Alpha's Wolfless mate : Kabanata 21 - Kabanata 30

The morning after the burial I could still smell the dirt and sadness in the air.I stood in the training yard with Damon next to me. The pack was spread out in front of us. Not everyone showed up. Some were still hurt. Some were too angry or scared.. Over a hundred people came. Warriors, a few omegas and some older teens who looked both excited and terrified. They wanted to train with the White Wolf. They wanted to learn how to survive the attack.I felt sick to my stomach.“You’ve got this " Damon said quietly. His hand brushed mine once before he stepped back. "Just show them what you can do. They need to see you. Not be afraid of you."I nodded,. My throat felt tight. Yesterday I tore out a man’s throat with my teeth. Today I was supposed to teach people how to fight beside me. My life still felt unreal.“Alright " I said, stepping forward. My voice came out steadier than I expected. "I’m not going to pretend I know everything. I only started shifting a days ago.. I’ll show you wh

I woke up screaming. It was not a scream but a broken and choked one that got stuck in my throat. The pain was everywhere it felt like something sharp was trying to get out from behind my ribs. My body felt wrong it was hot one second. Freezing the next. It was like fire and ice were fighting for space inside my bones.Damons strong arms tightened around me away. He whispered in my ear "I've got you I've got you, breathe, love, just breathe." I gasped and grabbed onto his shirt my nails dug in hard I felt them break skin but he did not flinch. He just pulled me closer one hand cradling the back of my head the other pressed flat against my back.He kept saying, "You're safe you're safe I'm here I'm here." It took forever for the shaking to stop. When it finally did I realized we were back in his quarters. The room was dim with one lantern burning low on the table. Someone had cleaned me up while I was out the blood was gone from my skin. I could still feel it, sticky and warm.I asked

The next few days were a blur.We kept burying our dead. We kept fixing the walls. We kept training until we were too tired to move.Every night I fell asleep in Damons arms. I tried not to think about the thing growing inside my chest.It felt like a darker heartbeat.It started small.I felt a spot behind my ribs. A quiet chill that wouldn't go away.Damon held me close. It didn't help.Then it spread.Little tendrils of darkness made my wolf restless.She. Growled, even when there was no threat around us.Sometimes I stared at nothing.I got lost in memories that didn't feel like mine.I remembered fire. My moms voice.My dad casting a spell with his breath.I didn't tell Damon how bad it was getting.Not at first.He knew.Our bond told him.One night after a day of training we lay in bed.The room was dark except for the moonlight.Damons arm was around me.His chest was pressed to my back.His breath was warm against my neck.His hand rested on my stomach.He moved his thumb in

The seed did not give me any peace. It followed me everywhere now. During training the seed was there. While I was eating the seed was there. In the quiet moments when I tried to steal a few seconds alone the seed was there. It was always there like a pulse under my own heartbeat, cold and patient and whispering things I did not want to hear.I started avoiding mirrors because every time I caught my reflection my eyes looked a little darker. Not the warm brown I was used to. Something sharper something hungrier. I told myself it was exhaustion. The pack was still. We were training harder than ever. Sleep was rare and broken.. Deep down I knew it was not just that. The seed was changing me. I could feel it.One evening I was alone in the clearing behind the pack house trying to meditate like Mara had suggested. The air was cool. The sun was just beginning to set, painting the sky in soft oranges and pinks. I sat cross-legged on the grass. Closed my eyes focusing on my breathing. In, ou

The decision to do the ritual happened fast. We could not wait anymore. The seed was getting worse. It did not wait for me to be tired or distracted. It spoke to me during the day in the middle of conversations while I was eating while I was training. Sometimes it was a cold feeling. Sometimes it was a voice that sounded like mine saying things I did not want to think about. They are all waiting for you to fail. Damon says he loves you. He will leave when you become something he can not control. Why fight for people who never fought for you?I started waking up in the middle of the night with my hands around my throat like I was trying to stop the whispers from coming out. Damon would wake up with me every time pulling my hands away gently holding me until the shaking stopped. He never got angry. He never looked at me like I was broken. He just held me. Whispered that he was there that I was still me that we would beat this.. I could see the fear in his eyes when he thought I was not