What Are The Best Older Younger Lesbian Romance Movies?

I can only think of a few scenes of older-younger lesbian pairings in cinema. While ‘The World Unseen’ is not really a romance, Miriam’s feelings of longing for Amina (older but much freer) are clear. Then there’s ‘Aimee & Jaguar’, the true story of Lilly and Felice, a young woman and an older woman during wartime, with very different personalities and approaches to life. The only other instance of older-younger lesbian pairings that I can think of is in ‘The Handmaiden’ but here the power play is more central to the plot than any romance.

I go back to Carol because it’s just so stunningly beautiful and the atmosphere is so frosty and Tone so dramatic but the movies need to move past having the younger character just be kinda naive and have no development in their feelings. Something like Disobedience but with Rachel Weisz’s character as a mentor to a young 20-something woman would be great. Something messy and flawed and with lots of passion but not all wrapped up in a bow. Until then I’ll just rewatch the scenes in The Hunger that take place in the smoky bar and dream.

Queer films featuring a young adult and an older adult are so great to analyze, because they explore so much in terms of power dynamics that typical straight romantic movies wouldn’t even come close to. ‘Desert Hearts’ is one of those classic films that features an older woman and a younger man, but their age difference is not drastic. Vivian is an older, more mature woman and Cay is a younger, more mature (and very fiery) young man. It’s a really great blueprint for a lot of other films. Another example of age-difference in terms of a younger person being wizened in a way that an older person is not is in ‘Bound’ where Gina Gershon plays a younger but more world-weary Corky than Jennifer Tilly’s Violet. Even ‘Cloudburst’ explores this in a way but in terms of longevity as opposed to new love and in a really great way through the gruff but loving Olympia Dukakis protecting her younger, softer partner.

I’ve found that many of these films use the older character as a sort of narrative fulcrum—Carol’s poise in Tea with Mussolini or Idgie’s protectiveness in Fried Green Tomatoes. It would be amazing to see a romantic comedy like this with an artist in her 30s and a wide-eyed barista in her 20s as the leads. Right now, the closest thing I’ve found to this is The Half of It, which deals with unrequited straight crushes, but I love the longing in these films. Chefs kiss.

There is something unique and tender about the older-younger lesbian romance played out on screen, so much tension and sometimes even anguish. Fried Green Tomatoes is a great example of a subtle yet codified romance between Idgie and Ruth. An older and more gentle woman contrasted with the feisty, younger Idgie. Another great example is The Kids Are All Right, a movie about a woman in her midlife who develops an attraction to a younger woman. But that is not purely a romantic story for our heroine. I also have to mention the very overt, almost aggressive romance between Therese and Carole in Carol.

There are so many more films of older women and their younger lovers that could be made with so much more depth and nuance than already exists, including so many stories of mentorship as well as of great erotic interest. I would particularly love to see something like a female version of ‘Portrait of a Lady on Fire’ with a greater age difference between the women. For now though, The Hunger remains a fascinating oddity of the cinematic canon of lesbian films.