Best Dark Jokes Novels & Stories

Marissa was the perfect wife. She gave up her high powered corporate career to build a beautiful life supporting her husband, Ethan—home cooked meals, a curated home, and unwavering loyalty. But her world shatters when Ethan confesses to a four-month affair, not out of guilt, but because his mistress is blackmailing him for $300 million. His solution is as cold as his betrayal: “Cheat back. Get even. Stay married.” Fueled by rage and humiliation, Marissa agrees. Determined to reclaim her power, she steps into the night seeking one reckless moment to erase the sting of his betrayal. It leads her to an exclusive masquerade club, where identities are hidden and desire rules. Behind a mask, she meets a commanding stranger—mysterious, intoxicating, and unlike anyone she has ever known. For one night, he sees her not as a wife, but as a woman with fire still burning inside her. Their connection is intense, unforgettable. By morning, Marissa disappears, intending to leave it as nothing more than a calculated act of revenge. But some secrets refuse to stay buried. When she returns to the corporate world, Marissa comes face to face with the man behind the mask....Xavier Sterling, her former boss, a ruthless billionaire CEO… and Ethan’s best friend. Xavier recognizes her. He knows her in ways no one else does and he knows exactly what Ethan did. Now, Marissa is trapped in a dangerous web. Her husband is desperate to keep her, his mistress wants her gone, and Xavier is determined to claim the one woman he was never meant to touch. As power, betrayal, and desire collide, Marissa must decide....will she remain a pawn in their game or become the one who controls it?

TW: ABUSE, VIOLENCE, DARK ROMANCE, DADDY KINK. THERE WILL BE MM, MF, and MFMM sex At 22 years old, Alyssa Bennett returns to her small hometown, fleeing her abusive husband with their seven-month-old daughter, Zuri. Unable to contact her brother, she reluctantly turns to his asshole best friends for help-despite their history of tormenting her. King, the enforcer of her brother's motorcycle gang, the Crimson Reapers, is intent on breaking her. Nikolai aims to claim her for himself, and Mason, ever the follower, is just glad to be part of the action. As Alyssa navigates the dangerous dynamics of her brother's friends, she must find a way to protect herself and Zuri, all while discovering dark secrets that could change everything.

She was always off limits. Until one forbidden summer, shy Elena surrendered to her brother’s best friend, the emotionally guarded Damien, in nights so hot they burned every rule to ash. Then he shattered her. Called their unborn child a bastard and walked away. Five years later, Damien comes face-to-face with the little boy who looks just like him… and the woman he never stopped craving. Now the man who runs from feelings must fight for the family he threw away. But Elena isn’t the timid girl he left behind and this time, she won’t make it easy.

Warning 18+ only :This is smut with a plot. It is the kind of book you crack open and immediately regret because now you’re hot and way too invested. Ever looked at your best friend’s brother and thought, yeah, that is a terrible idea, let me ruin my life a little? This book is that bad decision. It’s messy, it’s scandalous and fucking shameless. ~~~~ Dylanne Hayes has always had a huge crush on her best friend's brother, Kai. He's every woman's dream, and hers since she was 18. Now Kai is back in the States. He's different, more charming, and she swears she's over him, even after she's required to work with him at work. Work is supposed to be easy, but not with Kai Reed in the picture. Can she resist him this time or betray the promise she made to her bestie?

“Shh, little girl,” he growled, teeth catching my bottom lip. I fought the moan, but he circled my clit, my hips jerked helplessly against his hand. Then he pushed my panties aside and sank two thick fingers inside me. I soaked his palm, knees buckling as tremors wracked me. “That’s it, cum for me,” he whispered against my ear. I did. Waves crashed through me while he held me up, stroking gently, murmuring filthy praise that made it sweeter, deeper, more shattering than anything I’d ever felt with a woman. I’m a lesbian. I’ve always known it, claimed it shamelessly. I’ve mapped women’s bodies with my mouth, hands, loving every touch and gasp. My best friend’s tongue between my legs has made me come countless times. The only man I tried, my ex, was awkward, unsatisfying. I swore off them forever. I love women. I love my best friend. So why does this man, her father, the one I should never want make me wetter with one stroke than she ever has? Why am I aching for his cock, pushed inside me, thrusting relentlessly, filling me, ruining me in ways no woman could? Why does bending over his desk for him feel like the right thing to do? One forbidden touch. One devastating truth: I might never want another woman again. When I rejected the vice chancellor's advances, my best friend's obsessive aunt, she threatened expulsion. My friend took me to her father, the college owner. One look at his body and I was lost. That night in their home, hiding in the kitchen while watching him cook, I touched myself, craving what is forbidden. Will my best friend discover my sudden addiction to her father? Will her aunt ever stop wanting me?

I'd had a crush on my brother's best friend, Ethan—the most powerful Alpha of our Northern Territory—since I was twelve years old. When I was fifteen, I boldly confessed my feelings to him. He laughed and patted my head, casually promising, "When you turn eighteen and shift, if you're my mate, I'll mark you." That offhand promise became my greatest hope for three years. I spent every day waiting for my wolf to awaken, praying to the Moon Goddess that she would designate us as mates. But on the night of my eighteenth birthday, after my wolf first awakened, I was shocked to discover that Ethan truly was my mate! Ignoring the intense shifting pain coursing through my body, I immediately shifted into my wolf form and ran toward Ethan's training grounds. I clutched the gift I'd prepared long ago, but instead heard Ethan urgently confessing to his Omega assistant Victoria: "Who would be stupid enough to actually care about a true mate? The bond between her and me is just the Moon Goddess's mistake. I only love you. I'll only mark you as my Luna." The words hit me like silver bullets to the chest. My wolf whimpered in pain, the mate bond burning like acid in my veins. I stood frozen behind the trees, watching the man I'd loved for six years dismiss our sacred connection as if it meant nothing. Later, Ethan introduced Victoria as his "fiancée." When Victoria demanded that I publicly bless their marking ceremony, Ethan remained completely indifferent to my humiliation. "Sylvia should give us her blessing," Victoria announced at the pack meeting, her voice sweet as poison. "After all, she's been like a little sister to Ethan all these years." Every wolf in the room could smell my distress. But Ethan said nothing, refusing to even look at me. When rogue wolves attacked our territory and I was surrounded, Ethan didn't hesitate to scoop up Victoria—who had only a tiny scratch on her finger—and carry her away to find the pack healer. He left me bleeding and alone, silver claws ha

Avery Nash had two lives and one rule. Keep them completely separate. By day she was the captain of the Crestwood University cheer squad and a Business Management student holding onto her scholarship by her fingernails. By night she was Scarlett, masked and wigged and untouchable, dancing at Velvet Underground to cover the gap between what her scholarship paid and what her mother's deadbeat boyfriend kept taking from them. On the night her boyfriend cheated on her with her biggest rival, Avery made one reckless decision. She followed a brooding stranger back to his motel room and gave him the one thing she had been saving. Her virginity. "Take off the mask. I want to see you." He had said. "A little mystery never hurt anyone, did it?" she replied. She slipped out before dawn, telling herself she would never see him again. Then she rang her best friend, Jade's doorbell and he answered the door. Liam Harrington was Jade's new stepbrother, who she hated, the transfer quarterback every girl on campus was already talking about, and the boy sitting three seats away from her in every Business Management lecture. He was also the only person in the world who knew what Avery felt like without her armour on. He just did not know her real face. Now Avery was living three lives at once. The captain, the stripper, and the girl quietly falling for the one man she was absolutely forbidden to want. And the secret that started as one reckless birthday night was growing into something big enough to burn everything she had built.

His face was inches from mine. His breath ghosted over my lips—warm, whiskey-scented from dinner and my body remembered him instantly: the way he’d pinned my wrists, the slow grind of his hips, the filthy things he’d growled in my ear while I came apart beneath him. He leaned in. I felt the pull—like gravity, like hunger. My lips parted on instinct. Just one more inch and we’d be kissing again, messy and desperate, right here in his car like teenagers who couldn’t wait. But reality crashed in. I jerked back, pressing myself against the door. “We can’t.” His jaw ticked. “Why not?” "Because I practically raised you.” My voice shook. “Because your mom is my best friend and I'm way older than you..." "I don't care" he bit out, shocking me even further. "I’ve wanted you since I was old enough to know what wanting meant. And don’t pretend like you don't feel something too." Sophie helped raise him. She was there for homework, school runs, and the lonely years when his parents were too busy. To her, he was just her best friend’s son. Years later, she catches her husband cheating on their anniversary and loses her unborn child due to the shock, Sophie spends the night with a stranger that she never expects to see again. But the stranger is Antonio — the boy she once helped raise. Now he’s all grown up. Powerful. Successful. And off limits. She manages to escape from him — so she thinks — until days later, she gets hired in a fashion company where Antonio is the CEO.

My best friend offered me a place to heal from my cheating mate. She didn't realize she was handing me straight to her father. *** "What are you doing in my room without knocking?" he growled, his voice a low vibration that seemed to rattle my very bones. He was so close I could feel the heat radiating off his skin. "I'm sorry, Alpha..." I whispered, my voice trembling. "I-I lost my way." He tilted his head, a dark, predatory smirk tugging at his lips. "No. From now on, you call me Daddy, I can see exactly how much you want to." He pulled me flush against him, dragging his nose along the curve of my cheek. I shivered, my knees threatening to give way in his iron grip. My graduation day was supposed to be the best day of my life, but instead, I caught my mate with the campus beauty. When I confronted him, he didn't even offer an apology. He just looked at me with cold eyes and told me I was "just an omega." An Alpha wolf like him would never settle for someone like me. I was shattered, and to help me forget the heartbreak, my best friend took me home with her. What I didn't expect was to end up in her father's room. Seeing him like that, bare-chested and powerful sent a shock through my system. When he realized it was me, he gave me an order. I knew I was supposed to run back, I knew I wasn't supposed to be in his room in the first place, but instead, I knelt down to obey him, and in that moment, I didn't care about the consequences. I didn't care what would happen if my best friend caught us. I only wanted him.

They killed her on her twentieth birthday. Her own brother sold her like cattle while his best friend watched her bleed out in the woods all for the "greater good" of their failing pack. Ivory Vale died with tears in her eyes. A betrayal like no other. One year later, she was reborn with a hunger for revenge that threatens to consume what's left of her soul. *** Dangerous, devastatingly handsome, and absolutely lethal, Dante Torrino has never met a threat he couldn't eliminate until he finds a silver-haired she-wolf covered in fluid who makes his control crack. He should kill her. His family's ancient curse demands it. Every instinct screams she's dangerous. Instead, he saves her life and finds himself drawn into her web of vengeance and secrets. Because the more he learns about her death, the more he realizes her enemies might be connected to his own family's dark empire. Some betrayals run deeper than death. Some vengeance burns hotter than hellfire. And some loves are worth being reborn for.