Chat Kenalan Lucu

Desde que me casé con Julián Mendoza, él puso punto final a todas sus andanzas. Para todos, yo era la mujer que había ‘domado’ al ‘playboy’, y mi vida familiar era la envidia. Hasta el día de nuestro noveno aniversario, cuando vi por accidente los mensajes en el grupo de chat con sus amigos: “Oye Julián, ¿qué tal la experiencia de ayer en el Bentley con tu compañera de universidad?” “Lo hemos probado en todos lados. Está locamente enamorada de mí.” Debajo había una foto íntima de ellos, y el grupo se llenó de comentarios calientes, felicitándolos entre risas y bromas. Miré la pantalla y un dolor punzante me atravesó el corazón. De pronto lo entendí: toda aquella felicidad a mi lado no era más que un montaje perfectamente preparado. Me quedé sentada, inmóvil, toda la noche, esperando su regreso. Cuando al fin Julián llegó, trayendo un pastel de celebración, no pude evitar soltar una risa fría. —Ya lo sé todo. ¿No te cansa fingir?

It's my first time going on a trip with my boyfriend. I overhear him on the phone with his friend as they discuss how he's going to deflower me. "Grayson, you should be able to have your way with Summer this time, right?" "Don't even talk about that. She's so conservative—I've said and done everything, yet she refuses to budge!" I lower my hand instead of knocking on the door. I stand outside the room and listen as he continues. "Come off it. We've given you so many ideas in the group chat, haven't we? Have none of them worked? And didn't you guys get a room yesterday? You should've just brought sedatives. Think about how easy it would've been if you could've just knocked her out!" Grayson Hale snaps, "I forgot, alright? Besides, who would've known there'd be two beds in the room? She insisted on sleeping separately, too. I sneaked onto her bed in the middle of the night when I saw she was asleep. She woke up just as I was about to take off her clothes and kicked me off!" My blood runs cold. My hands tremble as I reply to my boss' message. "I accept headquarter's decision to transfer me."

When my neighbor's daughter-in-law falls pregnant, my neighbor issues a few "decrees" in a group chat for all residents in the area. "Number 1: Anyone whose family has daughters has to avoid leaving the house when my daughter-in-law does. I don't want them to hurt my grandson! "Number 2: Every family has to purchase meat and expensive fruits once a week and present them to my daughter-in-law! "Number 3: After my grandson is born, I will bestow upon everyone the honor to bask in his fortune. Every family has to give us 300 dollars as a gift. I will personally visit each family that doesn't!" She even singles me out with a message. "Unit 401, I want you to immediately stop feeding stray cats. I'll also give you three days to get rid of your cat! My daughter-in-law is scared of cats, and the creatures are covered in germs. What if she catches a virus from your cat when she goes downstairs for a walk? What if you hurt my grandson? "I command you to immediately bring me one thousand dollars as a deposit and guarantee. If I catch you feeding stray cats one more time, I'll confiscate the money!" I transfer 20 thousand dollars to her, yet she grovels at my feet and begs me to take the money back.

Kate terjebak dalam hubungan transaksional, hampir setiap minggu dia berhubungan badan dengan Matt. Sampai suatu ketika, Matt yang tidak tahan lagi, menjamah Kate dalam posisi tidak memakai pengaman. Kate kemudian hamil, tapi Matt tidak pernah sudi memiliki seorang anak dari Katt. Saat Matt memaksanya menggugurkan kandungan, Kate memilih melawan, mempertaruhkan segalanya demi buah hati yang belum lahir. Kate kemudian berjuang seorang diri hingg akhirnya lahir dua bayi kembar yang lucu, Angela dan Angelo. Tiga tahun berlalu, Kate menjalani kehidupan sederhana penuh perjuangan. Bersama adiknya, Alan, ia mengasuh kedua anaknya di flat tua, berhemat sekuat tenaga, sambil berusaha mencari pekerjaan yang lebih layak. Harapan muncul ketika ia diterima sebagai sekretaris sementara di sebuah perusahaan, sampai takdir mempertemukannya kembali dengan Matthew dalam sebuah rapat bisnis. Matt ternyata seorang CEO kaya raya dan melihat Kate, dia ingin bertanggung jawab. Sayang, harapan Matt dipatahkan ketika melihat Kate bersama Alan. Dia mengira, adik kandung Kate itu adalah ayah sang bayi. Kesalahpahaman terjadi sampai akhirnya rahasia itu terbuka; Matt tahu bahwa anak kembar Kate itu anaknya.

Awal baru yang tidak diinginkan datang ketika Edrea dipindahkan melalui sistem asuh ke rumah baru di pinggiran kota. Edrea sadar diri bahwa dia tidak pantas berada dirumah yang besar dan mewah, dan dia mungkin tidak akan pernah pantas menetap didalamnya. Namun, tanpa dia sadari Edrea mulai jatuh cinta dengan keluarga Gene yang memiliki keempat saudaranya laki-laki menawan, lucu dan berkarisma. Dan Edrea tidak bisa melupakan sahabat dari Bara kakak laki-laki tertua Gene, Jeff Alessandro. Sebelum dia bisa berkedip, dia benar-benar terlibat dengan Jeff. Secara alami, romansa dan ketertarikan muncul di antara mereka saat mereka menghabiskan lebih banyak waktu bersama. Edrea takut Bara akan tidak senang dengan ketertarikan mereka dan menyimpan barang-barang di balik pintu tertutup di mana Bara tidak bisa menemukannya. Namun, Edrea tidak bisa memungkiri bahwa ia mulai jatuh cinta pada Jeff. Di tengah badai bergejolaknya dalam mencoba menemukan pijakannya di kota baru, sekolah menengah baru, dan keluarga baru, dia melihat melalui lingkungan di sekitarnya yang keras dan dia peduli tentang apa yang ada di baliknya yang menjadikan Edrea siapa dia. Dan dia tidak peduli dengan masa lalunya.

Hai perkenalkan namaku Layinah orang terdekatku memanggilku Ina. Gue dulu pernah cinta sejatuh cintanya sama lawan jenis. Kita pacaran selama satu tahun dan putus karena si doi ternyata hanya jadikan gue pelampiasan doang. Setelah putus gue belajar mendalami agama jujur selama ini ilmu agama yang gue peroleh kurang. Gue hijrah alhamdulillah sampai sekarang dan ternyata sahabat gue abangnya itu mantan pacar gue yang dulu gue lagi bucin sebuncinya sama dia. Gue enggak menyangka dunia ini bener bener sempit. Kenapa Abangnya sahabat gue adalah mantan gue sendiri. Dapatkah Ina membuka hati baru atau malah terjebak zona nyaman dengan sang mantan? *** Hai perkenalkan gue Lutfi, mantan sekaligus laki-laki yang sampai sekarang masih ada di hatinya. Menyesal! Satu kata yang sampai sekarang masih buat gue merasa bersalah. Perempuan yang dulu tak pernah bakalan buat gue jadi segila ini. Layinah nama itu yang udah buat gue jatuh cinta sedalam-dalamnya. Dunia lucu kan di saat aku mencari keberadaan dia, ternyata takdir mempertemukan kami kembali. Lebih parahnya dia sekarang berteman akrab sama adik kandungku sendiri.

Menuju ke Jakarta, Mojo tidak mengetahui bahwa isi surat yang dibawanya dari Abah Anom adalah tentang perjodohan dirinya dengan Widya, putri tunggal Wisnu Wibisono sang pendiri Arung Bahari Corp. Widya yang kini memimpin perusahaan menggantikan ayahnya pun terkejut sewaktu membaca surat. Ia tentu saja tidak terima dengan perjodohan itu. Ia kemudian merahasiakan perihal surat tersebut, termasuk kepada ibunya sendiri. Mojo lalu diberi pekerjaan sebagai ajudan pribadi Widya. Awalnya Mojo menolak. Namun, karena ini juga salah satu amanah dari Abah Anom, ia pun menerimanya. Widya membenci Mojo dan hanya ingin memanfaatkan jasanya sebagai ajudan yang jago bela diri. Di sisi lain Mojo juga tidak menyukai Widya dan berharap segera terbebas dari amanah Abah Anom. Hari pun berlalu dengan berbagai dinamikanya. Momen-momen yang mendebarkan, lucu, tegang, mengejutkan, hingga mengancam nyawa pun datang silih berganti. Apakah Widya akan jatuh cinta kepada Mojo dan menerimanya sebagai pendamping hidupnya? Apakah Mojo berhasil menuntaskan amanah Abah Anom, yaitu menjaga Widya hingga tiba saatnya nanti menikah? Yang tanpa ia ketahui adalah dengan dirinya sendiri? Lalu bagaimana dengan Iroh?

It has been a year since our mate bond formed, but my fated mate Damon Borden has never lost control around me. Even in the height of desire, he will only use toys to help me find release, but he always refuses to let me help him. Despite how much my heart aches, I plan to let him go. Even though he is my fated mate, he doesn't love me. I get a potion from Helena Craw, the witch. This potion will dissolve our mate bond. However, the night before I'm about to take it, I stumble upon Damon in the study, using my photo while venting his desire. He does it again and again while murmuring my name and saying that he loves me. I'm shocked. I want to record the scene with my phone, but I accidentally take Damon's old phone. I tap on his chat records with Helena. "I'm the fated mate of the woman I love, and I love her very much. However, I'm far too strong. What if I hurt her while making love to her?" "How can I restrain my desire and control my strength to please a female wolf?" "If my mate runs off with someone else, how can I overcome my possessiveness and continue to love her?"

I set up a company cafeteria for employees with an abundant meal daily worth 150 dollars per person. Meals are prepared by a world-renowned master chef. Every day, I only ask my employees to contribute a token of one dollar. Instead of gratitude, all I get is their envy of the neighboring company. "I wish we had that. Their healthy lunches cost them nothing, and the company covers everything." "Yeah. Free salads always seem to taste the best." Before long, this chatter spreads through the office, and the new hires carry it into the company's group chat. "Mr. Shaw, can we switch things up? All this rich, heavy food is just too much for us!" A few of the senior employees quickly jump in. "Yes, Mr. Shaw! We're not asking for anything extravagant. We only want something like the healthy lunches the other company gives out for free!" Perfect. They ignore my lavish 150-dollar meals that cost them almost nothing, yet they pine over the neighboring company's modest lunches. I scroll through the chat, feeling nothing but sharp irony. I immediately send a company-wide email. "Attention, everyone! By popular demand, and so you can all experience a truly free lunch, the cafeteria's daily meal is reduced from abundant to simple starting today. "Snacks and fruit options are discontinued and replaced with the same healthy lunch set offered by the neighboring company. The company will cover the full cost. Enjoy your meal!"

Late one night after getting off work, I was scrolling through my company group chat when a colleague shared a piece of news. The headline was horrifying. "Night-Shift Courier Murdered During Delivery, Police Suspect Robbery." I zoomed in on the crime scene photo that had been partially pixelated, and a chill ran straight down my spine. Lying in a pool of blood, the courier who had been hacked to death was unmistakably me. I had scrolled into news of my own death. Almost at the same time, my delivery app began vibrating violently. "Urgent pickup! Destination: Unit 704 Hawthorne Ridge Apartments, Building 7. Time limit: 15 minutes. Penalty for timeout: Death." As I stared at the notification that read "Pickup failed three times", the searing pain of my brutal death surged through my body. So that was it. I had already died three times. When I forced open the half-closed security door of 704 for the fourth time, a thin delivery envelope lay quietly inside. I tore it open. A photograph slipped out. It was a picture of my dismembered body. The timestamp showed tomorrow at 7:00 a.m. On the back was a single line written in fresh blood: "Next time, remember to pick it up on time." At that moment, the red indicator light on the hallway surveillance camera suddenly went dark. I looked up. From the ventilation opening in the exact same spot, a single eye was staring straight at me. The mole at the corner of that eye was identical to mine.