Dark Humor Jokes Tagalog

They say darkness lives in us all... It's a lie, though. Because the darkness lives within me. Elara Temptation to sweet, lips too thick. When a handsome man invited me to a Halloween party,  I wasn't expecting to be drugged, abducted and offered as a human sacrifice for his dark cult, but I should've. Life had been miserable, and I'd never fitted in. So when death came for me, I welcomed it. Arms. Wide. Open. But Asher had other ideas. He stole me to kill me, but now? He keeps me just to play. His kisses left scars. His touches, fingerprints on my bones. But when he wakes the darkness in me, I realised he may just not like the monstrous little witch he created - Cross my heart. Asher. I had a job. Bring a woman to the circle just like my brothers had - kill the women presented, gain more power. It should've been easy. But then I saw her. My shadowed Vixen. Something whispered to me in the dark, a pulse in the air surrounding us. She felt different. She felt eerie and aloof, a mystery that lured me in. We had to know. I had to know. So I gave her a chance. Join us, or die. She laughed and told me she wasn't afraid of dying. So I made it my mission to drag her into my darkness, to toy with her until only a monster remained. And a monster was just what I got. Now, I'd do anything to get my girl back, even if it meant letting the darkness consume me, just so she could be bathed within the light - and hope to die.

(Jackson Gray's Story) Mereya was unable to face her long-term partner after a one-night mistake. She slept with a stranger whom she thought was her boyfriend, and it happened to be Jackson Gray, the town's hottest bachelor! Worse, she became pregnant as a result of one dark night! The next morning, she was kidnapped by the father of her child. Things heat up when Jackson asks for her hand in exchange of the truth—the truth about her father's death, the truth about her boyfriend's fiancee, and the truth about her real identity! "Marry me, and I will free you from all the lies and pain; be my queen, and let us destroy them together," Jackson murmured solemnly as he caressed Mereya's body. They thought everything's fine until nights became darker. Mapaninindigan ba nila ang pagmamahalang nabuo dahil sa mga pagkakamali o maghihiwalay sila ng landas na parang hindi sila nagkakilala kailanman? -------- GRAY SERIES 1 ONE NIGHT LOVE (TAGALOG) BOOK 1, 2 and 3 - COMPLETED GRAY SERIES 2 ONE NIGHT DARKER (TAGALOG) - COMPLETED GRAY SERIES 3 LONGING FOR MY EX-WIFE'S RETURN - COMPLETED GRAY SERIES 4 LOVE GAME WITH MY EXECUTIVE ASSISTANT ON-GOING

Masaya si Eunice nang mapangasawa ang lalaking mahal niya. Kahit nahihirapan siya sa kanya, patuloy siyang umuunawa at nagmamalasakit. Ikinasal sila para sa kapakanan ng kumpanya at sa kagustuhan ng kanilang mga magulang. Tiniis niya ang lahat, umaasa na balang araw ay matutunan din siyang mahalin at tanggapin ang kanilang kasal. Ngunit nagkamali siya; mas lalo siyang nasasaktan. Mas binibigyan ng atensyon ng kanyang asawa ang dating kasintahan kaysa sa kanya. Hanggang isang gabi, laking gulat niya nang makita ang kanyang asawang lasing na nakatayo sa harap ng kanyang kwarto. Bigla na lang siyang hinila papasok. Doon, may nangyari sa kanila. Ibinigay ni Eunice ang sarili sa kanyang asawa kahit lasing na lasing ito. Pagkaraan ng isang buwan, nalaman niyang siya ay buntis. Pinili niyang lumayo. Natakot siyang hindi siya paniwalaan at itakwil ang kanilang anak. Umalis siya nang hindi sinasabi ang tungkol sa kanyang pagbubuntis. Ilang taon ang lumipas, bumalik siya, ngayon kasama ang kanilang anak. Paano kung muli silang magtagpo at ang tadhana ay magbuklod muli sa kanila? Ano ang gagawin ni Eunice? Sasabihin ba niya ang katotohanan na may anak sila, o patuloy niya itong ililihim?

Tubong Leyte si Danica, naive at may pagka-ignorante---sa madaling salita, probinsiyana. Walang pangarap at kontinto na lamang mamuhay sa bukirin kasama ng mga magulang. Tanging ang kaibigang si Lily at kasintahang si Andrie ang nakakasalamuha niya simula pa pagkabata. At nang dumating sa puntong kinailangang umalis ni Andrie para magtrabaho sa Maynila ay naging mahirap para kay Danica. Sobrang ma-mi-miss niya ito. Pero dahil sa may tiwala naman siya sa huli ay nagawa niya ring pumayag hawak ang pangakong babalikan siya nito. Pero paano kung mabalitaan niya na lamang na ikakasal na ito? Magagawa niya kayang ipaglaban ang kasintahan at isama pabalik ng Leyte O ibang groom ang kaniyang mabingwit?

(21+) Harap bijak dalam membaca dan selalu berpikir positifRae Catalina adalah seorang perempuan cantik, yang juga merupakan sesosok pembunuh berdarah dingin. Tangan lembutnya yang terlihat lemah, ternyata mampu menghabisi siapa saja tanpa mengenal target buruannya. Karena satu dan lain hal, suatu hari ia terjebak oleh mangsanya sendiri. Dan hal tersebut, telah memaksanya untuk melakukan sebuah pernikahan dengan pria yang bernama Gerardo Ignacio.Laki-laki yang dimaksud, adalah seorang CEO dan pimpinan Mafia kejam yang menyukai hal-hal gila dan tidak pernah memandang sebelah mata siapa saja yang mengusiknya.Rae yang selalu merasa tersiksa dalam pernikahan palsu itu, akhirnya berniat membuat satu rencana baru untuk melenyapkan suami yang sekaligus adalah musuh baginya.Mampukah Rae menghabisi Gerando dan kembali pada hidupnya sebagai seorang pembunuh berdarah dingin? Atau, akankah ia tetap terjebak dan selamanya menjadi budak dari Gerardo?

"Aku akan menemukanmu. Tidak peduli berapa lama dan berapa kali mencoba, aku akan kembali dan mencoba lagi hingga semuanya bisa berakhir bahagia."

What do twelve years of captivity make of one? What lines behind the new Laurel Brown?Laurel Brown was only eight when she was snatched.Twelve years passed and the Browns had long moved on when Laurel Brown returns with the truth as well as secrets.

What if you're a broken-hearted? Would you do the thing that you haven't done in your whole life? Charmane Cordova. Unexpectedly meet, this most sought-after bachelor... Bradley Hernandez, A guy that she doesn't know yet, A guy that got her attention, and a guy she had spent her whole night with... And this will be their, JUST ONE NIGHT together.

Si Cherry Mae Banaag. Isang ulira at masipag na anak. Wala siyang ibang hangad kundi mabigyan ng masaganang buhay ang Ama na may sakit sa puso. Ngunit dahil sa hirap ng buhay at walang ipangtustos sa operasyon ng Ama ay kinailangan ni Cherry na tanggapin ang alok na tulong ng sikat na bokalista ng banda na Logistic Band na si Rexon Del' torre na nakilala lang niya sa isang bar kung saan siya nagta-trabaho. Noong una ay pumayag siyang mamasukan bilang Personal assistant nito ngunit kalaunan ay iba na ang hinihinging kapalit ni Rexon. Makakaya n'ya kayang gampanan ang kapalit na tulong na binigay nito? Oh dapat na siyang umatras dahil pati yata ang puso niya ay nagawa na nitong bihagin.

Buong akala ni Devina ay pananagutan siya ni Valentine dahil na ‘rin sa pangako nito sa kaniya. Ngunit hindi sumipot ang lalaki, ang ama ng kaniyang mga anak. Kung kaya nag decide siya na hinding-hindi niya ipapakilala ang mga bata kay Valentine at palalabasin na patay na ang kanilang ama. Ngunit sadyang mapagbiro ang tadhana. Makalipas ang pitong taon ay dadalo siya sa kasal ng kaniyang half-sister at ang mapapangasawa nito? Walang iba kundi ang ama ng kaniyang mga anak.