Dark Humor Jokes Tagalog

"I will not promise you a happy life once you agreed to this union." Isang Arranged Marriage ang kinasangkutan nila Lumiere Jane Ramirez at Drake Achyls Hernandez matapos ang kanilang Senior Highschool. Isa itong Promise of Union ng dalawang pamilya at sa kanila ito maisasakatuparan. Habang naghihimutok sa galit sa pagtutol si Drake ay kaiba naman kay Lumiere dahil ito ay matagal ng may gusto kay Drake. Akala niya isang fairytale, kapag naikasal ka sa taong matagal mo ng gusto pero mas lalong naging cold, indifferent at malupit sa kaniya ang lalaki to the point he handed her a divorce. Namatay ang lolo ni Lumiere at sinisi niya ang lahat kay Drake. Nais na niyang iwan ito at hindi na magpakita pero nagkita sila sa isang bar. Nakita ni Drake na nakikipagsayaw sa iba ang kaniyang asawa. Sa unang pagkakataon ay inuwi siya nito sa condo para komprontahin. Dahil sa kalasingan ay nauwi ang lahat sa isang mainit na gabi. Kinabukasan ay nakita ni Lumiere ang divorce agreement at pinirmahan niya ito dahil hindi naman niya kayang pilitin ang lalaking mahalin siya. At ang nangyari kagabi ay dahil lang sa kalasingan. It was just a s*x. Umalis si Lumiere at hindi na muli pang nakipagkita kay Drake. After 5 long years, nagkita silang muli ngunit siya ay nobya na ng kaniyang pinsan na si Orphen. Lalo siyang nagalit ng malaman niyang may anak na ang mga ito. Pinilit niyang bawiin si Lumiere at nagsimula ang bawat dagok sa kanilang buhay. Isa bang sumpa ang Promise of Union o kailangan lang nilang mapatunayan na para talaga sila sa isat-isa.

Ilang libong taon nang pinaghaharian ng angkan nina Timothy ang kaharian ng Zowol. Isang tagong mundo, kung saan mga naagnas na katawan ng mortal o kadalasan tawagin na zombie sa mundo ng mga tao. Sakop rin nila ang lahi ng mga lobo, kung saan sa pagdaan ng maraming henerasyon ay nagkaroon na ng pagkakabuklod at pagkakaisa sa bawat panig sa pagitan ng magkaibang lahi. Ngunit isang lahi ang hindi sang-ayon sa panukalang pag-isahin ang lahat. Ito ang mga lahi ng bampira, kung saan una silang napadpad sa mundo ng Acerria. Sa hindi inaasahang pangyayari, nagkaroon ng malaking digmaan sa pagitan ng mga Zowol at bampira na tumagal din ng ilang siglo. Sa labanan na naganap ay tuluyan nagapi at naubos ang mga lahi ng bampira. Pero iyon ang inaakala ng lahat, dahil may nag-iisang natira sa mga lahi nila. Si Kendra--- ang anak ng Hari ng mga bampira kay Aliyah, isang mortal na nakatakas bago maubos ng Zowol ang lahi ng bampira. Patuloy ang paghahanap sa nasabing huling bampira, ngunit hanggang sa kasalukuyan ay nanatiling walang pagkakakilanlan nito. Tanging ang pilat na kalmot sa likuran nito na ginawa ng hari ng mga lobo ang palatandaan dito. Sa pagdaan ng mga taon, tuluyang kinalimutan ang paghahanap dito. Ngunit sa hindi inaasahang pangyayari ay muling hahanapin si Kendra. Dahil nakasalalay sa huling dugo ng bampira ang kaligtasan ng mundong kanilang ginagalawan na nangnganib mawasak sa hinaharap...

How far can you run from a dark prince after you have witnessed his dreadful secret? Would you rather win or submit to destiny? ........... A peaceful simple college life with a perfect girlfriend was all Ethan ever wanted when he enrolled in Bordwell University, to begin his new phase of life. But on his first day here, he ran into 'The Dark Prince Of The Campus', Zeus Blackwell...who was far opposite to him in terms of characteristics, and traits...and nothing about him was labeled ordinary either. Attracted to him since the first glance, Ethan was determined to stay away from Zeus. But fate played the role to lead them to each other...until the moment Ethan was exposed to Zeus's dark secret which he had hidden from the whole world, behind his image of being the perfect heartthrob of the campus! Zeus Blackwell, a lone Supreme Alpha who had escaped into the world of humans hiding a deep scar inside his cold heart, only for a mission his whole existence depended upon. But when his path crossed with a very ordinary human Ethan, he couldn't stop himself from being intrigued by him, especially his eyes which gave him a long-lost glimmer of hope... It was all fine until Ethan was exposed to the cursed secret he had hidden from the human world. What happens when two opposite broken hearts find solace in the evil world? How will Zeus protect Ethan from the world of dark secrets he had exposed to him? Was Ethan tangled with Zeus by the thread of destiny? Will the forbidden love of a Werewolf and Human win against every odd, or will they lose each other 'once again?'

Pragmatic Marriage will bind them together. She fell but he didn't catch her, yet she still stayed. Not until a revelation wrecked her heart out. A secret that was kept as a hidden agenda revealed and it ruined everything between them. She left with a heavy baggage - a baggage she never expect to have in life, a baggage that made her a strong independent woman. [THIS IS THE TAGALOG VERSION OF ROMANCING THE DEVIL BY BABYBLUEAYE]

Matured Content 🔞 This study contains sensitive scenes. Meet Quice Smith, a 22 years old college student. Kung saan sekreto siyang nagkagusto sa kaniyang professor na si Mr. Dark Salves- a 30 year old biology major teacher. Hanggang sa hindi inaasahan na ang nameet ni Quice sa isang sikat na bar ay ang kaniyang guro pala, and worse may nangyari pa sa kanila dahil sa kalasingan."Sucked Me, Mr. Dark" saad ni Quice habang nakapikit. Mag wo-work kaya sila? Paano kung malaman ni Quicee na si Mr. Dark ay Isa palang Mafia?

First of all if you don't like women be controlled by the men or can't tolerate abusive content then I would prefer you to skip this story. Remember this story is not for below 18. This story is strictly only for 18+ adults. I was about to say something but then I froze in my place when I felt a gun on the back of my waist. My voice just stuck in my throat. He pressed the gun more to my waist making me let out a small gasp. "I am not only a billionaire kitten. I am also a mafia leader. And this crazy mafia wants you at any cost. And it will be better if you just submit to me or I have my own ways to make you do it." I flinched when I felt his cold lips on my warm neck. I tried to move away but he wrapped his one hand on my waist and other was still pressing the gun. And the--- What will happen when two mad and crazy billionaires wanted only one girl who want nothing from them. One who broke her dignity and other who kept on her soul. Will she be able free herself from this nightmare. OR Will remain bound to four walls of darkness. A dark romance story. I hope you guys like it. WARNING; THIS BOOK CONTAINS MATURE TRIGGERING CONTENT. RAPE AND ABUSIVE SCENES. READ IT OWN YOUR OWN RISK. Copyright 2020 Marwians

Si Serena Montana ay isang career woman na nagtatrabaho bilang isang na manunulat para sa isang malaking publishing house company sa Sydney, Australia. Nakatanggap siya ng magandang balita mula sa kanyang Boss na ang kanyang manuscrit ay pinili ng isang sikat na movie producer at magkakaroon sila ng television drama adaptation para sa kanyang nobela. 50% of the scenes will be shot in her own country, kaya naman kailangan niyang bumalik ng Pilipinas. Pero hindi inaasahan ni Serena na marami pang mangyayari pagbalik niya ng Pilipinas. Serena had a shock of her life when she found out that her younger sister's boyfriend is none other than Paolo Montes, her very first love! At isa ang nakakagulat na twist of events--- si Paolo pala ang direktor na makakatrabaho niya para sa isang proyekto! Will she be able to finish her work without falling in love with Paolo again?

Anika, represents elegance, brightness, or sweetness, but Anika Drayton is the exact opposite of these qualities. She's a feminist who advocates for women's rights through her caustic writings. An over-bittered girl who despises males after being abandoned by Clyde André, the only guy who made her heart skip a beat as everything around her slowed down. Since the day he abandoned her, she had seen every guy as a low-class hypocrite. When Clyde resurfaced in her life, her ideals began to crumble. What is her game plan? What if she discovers the reason why Clyde abandoned her? Will her efforts be in vain?

"I will make you mine. I am not Phoenix Dark Mariano for nothing." Julliana Delos Reyes is a brave and gorgeous woman. Matapos ang isang trahedya sa buhay niya ay pilit siyang ipinakasal ng kaniyang tiyahin sa lalaking hindi niya kilala. David Asuncion, made her life miserable, palagi siya nitong binubugbog at ipinapahiya sa mga nagiging babae nito. In order to protect her daughter wala siyang magawa kung 'di tiisin ang lahat ng 'yon. Not until, she met Phoenix Dark Mariano. Nakuha ng binata ang atensyon niya dahil sa kakaiba at misteryosong presensya nito. Phoenix Dark Mariano is a CEO of XV Company, ngunit nakatago ang tunay niyang pagkatao bilang Mafia Lord. Nang makita niya si Julliana ay tila nagbalik muli ang isang bangungot sa buhay niya. Gusto niyang mas makilala pa ang pagkatao nito. Ngunit paano kung malaman niyang kasal na ito at may pamilya na? Are they both willing to commit sins in order to be happy? Paano kung malaman ni Julliana ang tunay niyang pagkatao pati na ang kaniyang pakay? Kapwa pa ba nila maituturing na pag-asa ang bawat isa kung ang nakaraan nilang dalawa ay ang dahilan ng pagkasira nila?

Book 1 - You'd better watch out. The danger is not just lurking in the dark. accompanies each of our steps. Instinct drives them.In a world full of monsters, there are those who are willing to risk their lives to save humanity from ruin. The hunters.After the trauma of her childhood, the ambitious young Grace decides that she will be one of those who hunt down the monsters and does everything she can to achieve this goal. She only wants one thing, to take revenge on the beings that her parents once snatched from her. But when Grace is forced to meet the grouchy Reese and his troubled brother Nick, she has to admit that the monsters of this world not only lurk in the dark shadows of the night. She is drawn into a vortex of intrigue, power struggles and greed for money and soon finds herself confronted with a creature that is more dangerous than anything known before.-------Book 2 - You'd better watch out. The danger is not just lurking in the dark. accompanies each of our steps. Instinct drives them.In a world full of monsters there are those who are willing to risk their lives to save humanity from perdition. The hunters.Finally, the years of hard work are paying off, Grace is officially a Venator and with Reese at her side she believes she can cope with anything that fate throws at her. But an unbelievable message from Jilin pulls the shadows from the past and stirs her thirst for revenge. Grace takes on this challenge and gets a stone rolling that cannot be stopped and slowly not only she begins to doubt her sanity.