Food Jokes

He smirked, knowing he was on the winning side. "So it's a done deal for three months?" He raised his eyebrows, putting his hand forth for a handshake. I looked at the long fingers and perfectly aligned nails and then at his patient face. Sighing to myself I my own hand into his and ignored the tingles that flowed through every nerve as his fingers curled around my hand and shook it lightly. "Yeah three months." "Goodnight then." He winked, removing his hand from mine and turned to walk away. "Hey wait!" I called out, suddenly remembering something. "You don't have my number." "What makes you think that? I have my ways Smith." And with one last wink I saw him take a turn and disappear from my sight. I let out a long breath, leaning on the nearby wall. Looks like I just made a deal with the Devil. * A sarcastic girl, a cocky guy. Throw in some mystery, murder, filthy jokes, wonderful friends, tons of kisses, secrets, surprises, eye-rolls and a killer on run. And you have got yourself a story never read before. ***So grab a cup of hot chocolate, some chips and a warm blanket and get ready to laugh, cry and bite your lip in anticipation. Enjoy!!

The prophecy has been told. A Tribrid will be born to slaught*er every people who oppose with its rule. She will be the queen of all, and every person who will go against her will not only lost his life, but will also burn his soul. Every races was threatened, thus, they made one cruel rule: No Tribrid shall be born. However, few years later, an omega from Shadow pack made a disturbance with its destructive power that trembled everyone. But no one had found where the Tribrid girl after the incident. They were restless. They need to find the tribid and kill it before everything became too late. One the other hand, Sidrich was oblivious of the destructive power within her. Being abused and slaved her whole life, it was hard for her to trust someone again. But meeting the second prince of Sharmai empire, Prince Alastair, Sidrich found herself trusting the prince instantly. His flirtatious remarks, his corny jokes, and his undying devotion to protect Sidrich at all cost beyond everything and everyone made the latter feel safe and comfortable towards the prince. Amidst of all chaos and chasing, the two fought for their love that has never been permissible. However, happiness comes with a price. With enemies trying to find and kill the tribrid, could the two of them would be able to fight until the end of all the havoc?

Matthew Guerrero is the youngest son of a Mafia boss. He is a hot-headed man who always lets his fists act before his brain. But on the day he almost died at the hands of a treacherous client of his family, a man saved him—and that man was none other than Kaizer, someone who drifts from job to job. Their paths cross again when Kaizer becomes a bodyguard for the Guerrero family. Even though Kaizer once saved Matthew’s life, the two of them still constantly clash, both inside and outside the Guerrero mansion. Yet as time goes by, they slowly come to understand each other, and no one can separate these two men—through hardship and joy, they are always together. They get kidnapped together, shot together, end up in the hospital together, and even suffer food poisoning together from the street food they ate. After everything painful they have gone through, they are always side by side. Until little by little, what they feel for each other begins to change. Matthew thinks at first that it is just because Kaizer is his friend, but he realizes that what he feels for the man who is always with him is something far deeper. It is not easy for them to confess their feelings to each other before finally becoming a couple and doing the things only couples do. But behind those happy moments, Kaizer is hiding a secret—one that will shatter Matthew’s heart and world. A secret he has kept hidden for so long, one that will eventually explode and damage their love: a love born from trust and true affection… and lies.

Louise Nimby De Jesus is living her life to the fullest even without wealth on her side. She has her Best Bud Mnebane, Her mother, and her best friend Bleatish. But the day where her birthdate arrives, blowing candles and a little cooked food, her mother had a heart attack, a house mortgage, and a debt her father had before he dies. Having a hard time getting money to sustain her mother’s heart operation and to pay all the debts her dead father has. That is when Hyrous happen, Bleatish Offered her a job by marrying Hyrous Valleur her best friend's fiance.

Misty I looked at the faces of my pups on the screen, being away from them was so hard but I had to make it better. I had to provide for them. Give them the best chance I could as a single uneducated Mother. They'd had such a crap start to life, mostly my own fault because if I hadnt stayed when he continued to allow the alcohol to become him, they wouldnt have been through the hell, but then if I hadnt stayed they all wouldnt exist and i dont regret any of them, No matter how they were conceived. My Life, My Legacy, My loves. I listened to them tell me about all their adventures and the feasts they ate from banana leaves. Id put out an ad searching for somebody to take care of them while I worked, somebody to love them and assure them i wasnt abandoning them just trying to make things better. Id found those angels, theyd accepted accomodation food and utilities in exchange for making sure my pups were fed, clean and cared for. I thanked the driver for the ride and entered the roadhouse, passed all the food that made my stomach rumble from its 48 hour emptiness, made use of the amenities and headed out back to try and get another ride north that would hopefully take me all the way back to my pups. I took a seat at an empty table, aware of the fact i hadnt showered in 3 days, I kept my eyes down and avoided contact listening for conversation that would point me to a driver heading north. That was the beginning of the rest of my life.

The whole world got sucked into a survival horror game. While everyone else was grinding mobs and trying not to get wiped, the system bugged out and tagged me as an NPC. My role? Takeout girl. I cruised around on my busted scooter, dropping food at boss lairs. If my rating dipped under 9.0, I'd keel over instantly. I figured I was just some unlucky idiot skating on death's edge. Then a pack of dumb players tried to jack my ride. That's when the scariest bosses in the game roared at once: "Who the hell thinks they can touch my crew?!"

Sitting at the top of the food chain; the new emperor of Arcland who took the crown by force, was the ruthless and cold-hearted former general of the Royal army, Carzus Luis de Saltiere. He was widely known as the Death Sword of the battlefield who slaughtered kingdom after kingdoms with a wave of his sword. Not only that, his beast mask that covers his entire face added a ferocious aura on his already intimidating presence. But this very man that frightened everyone who cross paths with him acted like a shy puppy in front of Chiara ──a woman who was brave enough to ask him for a dance during the royal ball. The emperor was possessed! by .... love?

She is the epitome of joy. Bubbly, adorable, and innocently sweet. All her life she had devoted herself to caring for her loved ones. All of a sudden, her dreams came true. No, there's no time for love. Food is her romance, cooking is her passion. But what if, unexpectedly love comes knocking on her door? Will she run or stay? He doesn't care for a mate. In fact, he doesn't care for romance at all. His energy is too much drained from managing his realm. He doesn't even have the energy to bed a woman. But what if, unexpectedly he meets his silver hand? Will he fight for her?

In her quest to keep surviving, Timbre, a lone wolf sneaks into an annual ball celebration to steal some food, when she bumped into the most feared and heartless Alpha to roam the earth, going through one of his panic episodes. Instead of freaking out like every other person, Timbre is amused and moves closer to him in an attempt to calm him down. Fortunately or unfortunately, she makes his panic episodes stop, but instead of a gratitude from this Alpha, she is captured and locked up in his territory. Would this be the beginning of her suffering or the start of a love story? What happens when Timbre finds out she is more than a mere lone wolf?

Iris only wanted a simple life with her family. Following the death of her father, her mother got married to the Beta of another pack and died of food poisoning. She is made a slave in her stepfather's house and as if that wasn't enough, her destined mate, prince Fenrir, rejected her. She is discarded as she wasn't needed anymore and stumbled upon the Alpha of the Silver Moon Pack. Now, in order to become Alpha of his pack, Fenrir was tasked with finding and accepting Iris as she is tagged a gift from the goddess because of the birthmark on her neck. How will he be able to do that when she falls in love with her protector and refuses to go back?