Funny Cartman Novels & Stories

"Why do you hate me so much, Maan" she asked hiccupping, hitting his chest. "I never said that" he said holding her hands. ____________________________________ "So, my Ita, how does it feels to be Mrs. Dutta," he asked holding her from behind while making eye contact in the mirror. "Best feeling in this world, Mr. Dutta" she replied kissing his cheek. ____________________________________ "I BLOODY ASKED YOU TO DO ONE THING BUT YOU CAN'T EVEN DO THAT!" he shouted slamming the wooden desk with his fists. "I am sorry, sir" she replied with tears welling up in her eyes. ____________________________________ "I will kill that man if I see him near you again" he said dangerously running his index finger from her forehead to neck. "W...why" she asked stammering. "Because you are mine"...

Love does not appear with any warning signs. You fall into it as if pushed from a high diving board. No time to think about what’s happening. It’s inevitable. An event you can’t control. A crazy, heart-stopping, roller-coaster ride that just has to take its course. Hazel was rejected by someone she loved and was told that he would be engaged to her deadly foe. In great despair, she went to a bar and met this handsome guy (Zac). They drank a lot and played games. Under the influence of alcohol, they got married. However when they came back to her senses, they decide to make things right, but it's hard to get a divorce now because she wants to use the dramatic yet genuine marriage to keep her proud in front of her deadly foe. Zac on the other hand was the future heir to one of the richest and prosperous families. Although he was endowed with an otherworldly handsomeness, he was known to be as cold as ice and had a natural dislike for women although they always craved after him like bees to a honey pot. But for some unknown reason, he finds something unique about Hazel which he can’t explain. Perhaps, it were her eyes which were limpid and pure like autumn water and sparkled like azure pools in the morning sunlight… Would it be possible that they fall in love with each other in the future? Take part in this amazing piece, and experience a story filled with various mysteries and incredible twists as she uncovers the mysteries surrounding Zac who decides to hide his identity and tremendous background in order to win her heart genuinely.

So there I was, stuck in this dark Victorian mansion for a whole freaking century, thinking I'd never get out. Then, out of nowhere, these two gorgeous girls swoop in and rescue me! I couldn't believe it, and we instantly hit it off. They showed me a whole new world I'd only ever imagined, and I was all about living a normal human life.   But just when I thought things were looking up, this vampire named Vivaldi pops up out of thin air, grinning like a possessed Jack-o'-lantern. I mean, a name like Vivaldi is bound to give you the creeps, right? He claimed I had some ancient first blood running through my veins and demanded that I sign some crazy blood contract with him—the kind of deal that comes with some seriously freaky consequences.   Vivaldi was trying to sell me the idea that this blood contract was his only lifeline, the only way to save his skin from something worse than death. But I wasn't some clueless newborn vamp; I knew better than to just dive into something as serious as a blood contract. Those things come with some heavy consequences, and I wasn't about to sign up for that without a second thought.   The problem was, if I didn't go along with his messed-up plan, he promised to make my friends' lives a living hell—the very people I'd started to care about. I was trapped between a rock and a hard place. If I decided to team up with Vivaldi, I'd be keeping him around, which is far from ideal. But if I refused, my friends and the whole town of Shadowvale would be in serious danger.    It felt like I was caught in this impossible situation, like I was trying to choose between two rotten apples.

Hazel doesn’t like boys, in fact, she stays as far away from them as possible. She wears baggy clothes, doesn’t do makeup and tries her best to go unnoticed. Her plan worked… for a while, until she got the baddest boy in her university hot on her tails. Worst of all? He is her roommate. How will she possibly survive ? Cover by : FatimaZahra970 (Wattpad)

Sext Buddy: [I’d do anything to fuck you right now.] Alicia: [I want you so bad too…really.] During the summer, Alicia has been sexting with a total stranger in hopes that she’d never meet him. At the beginning of college, her mum tells her that they have a guest. She meets the stranger she was constantly sexting. But then, what happens when the stranger is her cousin?

Cassandra Johnson is Pixie. Pixie is Cassandra Johnson. She's the same girl who's leading two extremely different lives. Nobody would suspect the school's nerd as Pixie. 'Cause Pixie's a street fighter badass and the nerd does not have a single badass bone in her body. The chances of people discovering this peculiar secret is close to none but of course this is where fate inserts the certified new boy into the equation and makes an exception for him. Warning: heavy flow of profanities ahead. - and tears - or so I've heard.

Christmas is the most magical time of the year, right? That may be true for most people but not Julia. Julia has never had an easy life, she has been homeless for as long as she can remember and now she is raising a three-year-old the same way. She wants more for them both but she has no way of changing things, besides she's soon going to have to leave the only place that she's ever called home to keep them both safe. If anyone finds out her secret her world will be blown apart and that's something that she can't allow to happen. Riley has had the best life imaginable. He has loving parents, grandparents and his best friend Joshua has been by his side since he was a young child. He also runs several successful businesses and has everything he wants in life except for one thing... love. He wants someone to love, to cherish but his past still has a tight grip on him and holds a secret that not even he knows about. What will happen when both worlds collide? Can Julia get the Christmas that she has always dreamed of for her and her little girl? Can Riley learn to forget his past so that he can move forward and when Juila's secret is revealed and blows both of their worlds apart, will it bring them together or tear them even further apart and destroy Julia's world, just like she has always feared it would?

Katie finds herself about to go to jail for something she didn't do. When gorgeous Samantha saves her and makes her an incredible offer. Katie has no idea of the dangerous game they are playing

Andreanna Gutierrez, or simply Andrea is a nerdy delivery girl who, in one stormy night in a secluded area accidentally bumped over the heir to an enormous business empire, the Jackson Corporation. The heir is Allen Miguel Jackson, who is known as the most elite, fine-looking, eligible bachelor and a cold-hearted person. He asked Andrea to take responsibility to what she did and therefore, she was compulsory to bring him at her rented place and look after him for a while until he is fully recovered. Over time, despite of Andrea's lack of good looks and outdated sense of fashion, Miguel learned to acknowledge her capabilities and innate compassion that he agreed for her to become his personal assistant. Soon after, the two souls became close friends until Andrea admits to herself that she's deeply in love with her boss. How will Andrea win the indescribable heart of someone who's way out of her league? Is it possible that a wealthy, powerful, and good-looking guy like Miguel will eventually fall in love with her nerdy appearance? Or will he hate her after knowing her secrets? Will a mighty CEO and a mere nerdy personal assistant could have a happily ever after?

When Elizabeth Walter gets fired from work, getting home to meet her boyfriend molded to the thighs of another lady, screaming her brains out against the wall, all hell, let's loose. Her once upon a fairytale life is shattered. Having loads of loans to pay back, Elizabeth's once 'alright' life becomes a disaster until she met him. The one whose name strikes fear into the heart of others Zane Creed. A workaholic with no social life, he needs a date for a business dinner. She needs the money for the next day. Just when Elizabeth's love life gets trampled on, A tall manly blue-eyed demon comes crashing in, making Elizabeth cream her thongs with just a look. Elizabeth might just be getting more than she bargained for when she becomes 'The Escort.'