Funny Friend Contract Novels & Stories

I couldn’t believe I got that tidbit of information before I even signed the contract with them. I swallowed before I turned to face them. “So, who is Blue and who’s Fred?” “I’m Fred. He’s blue,” the always teasing one said, shrugging when I raised a brow. With a nod, I returned to the file in front of me. I read a bit to know that this contract will last for two months and throughout that time, I will let them fuck me whenever they wanted. Their payment was to answer any question I might have. With a sigh, I picked up the pen, having decided. It was too late for me to reconsider, not after I boasted that I would be the one to crack this case and get an interview with the brothers.

“Clean as a clean be, No litigation or bankruptcies.” “Hmm, maybe they are actually good,” I mused, though my skepticism remained. I hesitated for a moment, feeling the weight of our short acquaintance. “Can I see the full contract? The actual full print usually tells the story the brochure hides.” I asked this feeling very skeptical that she would actually agree. We are only two weeks into this friendship. People don't just hand over proprietary financial contracts to the person they meant two weeks ago, I expected a polite deflection, a "maybe later," or a sudden change of subject.

“No leverage of any kind, and definitely no surprises. I hate surprises.’ I nodded thoughtfully, wondering what would happen if I actually tried surprising her. “…I can do most of that.” Axel groaned. “Alexei.” “I said most,” I repeated with a pout. “Which brings me to my condition.” Brielle closed her eyes. “Here it comes.” “I want a contract.” She stared at me. “A what?” “A friendship contract,” I revealed with a bright smile. Axel blinked. “You’re kidding.” “Dead serious.”

I chuckled, the sound bubbling up from somewhere deep and genuine. I placed my hand flat on the desk between us, suddenly feeling the heaviness of what we were really doing here. "Leave the contract aside... so let us make a promise here. That no matter what happens... the three of us will be friends for life." Theo nodded immediately... with understanding. Max, surprisingly, didn't crack a joke or make a sarcastic comment. Instead, he placed his palm over my hand... his touch warm and solid. Theo followed, his hand settling on top of Max's, completing our little pact.

“I mean a two hour or so wait and then on top of that over a hundred dollars to drop you off and bring you back in the morning. Save the money so you can fix your car tomorrow. Call it a friend helping out a friend.” “When you put it that way.” He said as he looked at her. “You know I think that I like this. No expectations of anything but a good night.” “Isn’t that what friends do?” she asked. “Honey, I want you to know that I do hope that we can remain friends for a long time, but I would like to see if this could be something else as well.” He said, and as soon as the words were out of his mouth, he knew he might have ended any hope of that happening.

Their friend who’s with me is already arrogant, so not vaguely that they have a friend who is flirty. “Stop that, Tyron I still have something to do so please create us contract now.” Disgusted he said, even though they are friends he should not be ordering his friend like that. I rolled my eyes, what a bastard. But his friend just didn't seem to care and he even managed to laugh. “Woah easy, why are you in such a hurry, Knight?” He said and walked toward his table. “To be honest you don’t need to create a contract, the mark is temporary for how many months?”

Damn it if I could get a few minutes with the man I would surely give him a piece of my mind. “So I got your update on work Friday. Congratulations. I am so very happy that our hard core playboy has settled down.” Lee jokes. “Fuck you.” I say with a straight face as I sip my beer. “There has to be a loophole. As my personal lawyer I need you to look and find a way out of this for me.” “Well, as I told you originally. There is no loophole from that contract.” Lee reminds me from our same conversation from yesterday. “I pay you extremely well. Plus you are one of my closest friends. So find a way. I can’t stay in this… this situation too much longer.”

“I’ll follow you to hell.” “Don’t you have anything better to do than try to screw over my family?” “Oh, I do! But screwing with Ernest Abertton is my favorite hobby.” I couldn’t hold back a smug grin, noticing no trace of emotion in her eyes. “When does the contract end?” she asked the lawyer. He opened his mouth, but I cut him off before he could speak. “It’s a lifetime contract, Stick-Figure! It ends when one of us dies!” I savored the words like they were a gourmet dish from a world-class chef.

“Did he?!” Connor burst out laughing. “No, he didn’t. I think it was the only time in his entire life he didn’t sign a contract – because he totally underestimated me. He thought I’d never learned a thing from him. You should have seen his face. Especially when I said, ‘And since you don’t, how are you going to enforce the agreement?’” I laughed in spite of myself. “Did he know what you were referring to? The Monopoly games, I mean?”

I could hear everything. “ You did what?” I heard the caller say. “ I’m having her sign a contract.” He said like the arrogant bully he was. “ What kind of contract?” The caller asked. I heard him chuckle, proud of himself for having come up with such a preposterous contract. “ Oh, just something where we both get what we want, we meaning me, of course.” He spoke so self assured of himself. I heard the other person laughing and it annoyed the hell out of me. “ Dude, you dog. What does it say?” He asked, and that guy chuckled again.