Funny Vasectomy Meme Novels & Stories

Yvonne interrupted her friend coldly, "Don't tell me what to do. Shut up if you want out. Someone else will take your place. That bastard lied about the vasectomy and made me go through this. He has to pay." Her fury frightened the others. They immediately nodded along. "Alright, calm down. We'll handle it right away." I could feel my fury boiling, burning me from within. My nails were digging into the cold, rough walls of the hospital. "What if he starts suspecting you if you don't stop?" Yvonne sneered and scoffed at the remark. "So what? He's an idiot who won't see the truth. He'll always think I would love him back if he never stopped loving me. Even if he does find out, he probably won'

The way he was staring back at me, I had never seen this side of him before. Looked as if he was about to burst out laughing, he directed his steps toward me. "So, she told you." I nodded again. Somewhat to my surprise, his lips twisted into an evil smirk, "Listen, I don't know if you know about this, and I doubt my little brother has ever said a word to you." After taking a small pause, to which felt to me like a whole one minute, he finally let out. "I can't have kids." He said, "And it is not that I do not want to. It's because I can't. I had a vasectomy five years ago."

she replied. He nodded, patient ready to hear what she had in mind because he knew the vasectomy talk had gotten her mind so far. “Okay. Talk to me.” She turned to face him, as her arms were folded across her chest as if she was trying to hold herself together. “When you told me about the vasectomy… I tried to laugh it off, just to accept everything because I am scared of bringing a baby into this world when I as the mother I am not fine. I told myself it didn’t matter. That maybe our love was enough.” Her voice softened. “But as I think of it, I expected more from you than I actually could admit. And now that I look at you and at us, I’m a little too scared I was wrong to pretend it didn’t

I pull her back to the couch. She sits. Looks at me. The anger cools just enough for her eyes to soften. “There’s something else,” I say. She waits. “He told me he had a vasectomy.” The words come out flat and strange, stripped of everything by the sheer exhaustion of carrying them. “Before our marriage.” Maya stares at me. “Then how the fuck is Kristen the hoe pregnant?”

"I had a vasectomy, so you don't have to worry about a pregnancy. Use this to get medication if you're still sore, and for anything else you might need. I'll give you as much space as you require." "I don't want your money," I spit, recoiling from the card like it was poison. "And don't be fucking noble with me after you've just fucked me in that room." I'm trying so hard to sound harsh, to muster some shred of sass, but my words just sounds broken. "I hope I never see you again." I sniffle, turning on my heel and walking out of his apartment before breaking into a run, not stopping until the elevator doors closed behind me.

Roaring, he grabbed my neck, choking me. "You're nothing but a bitch!" He bellowed, yanking me away roughly. I staggered, trying to keep upright. "You're the only one who sleeps me with, how dare you deny it now." He moved closer, squatting before me. "Yes, we I do fuck with you but there's definitely no way I'm going to get you pregnant after undergoing vasectomy." I gasped, stunned. Vasectomy? "Do you get it now?" An evil grin tugged at the corner of his lips, "I did that to stop bitches like you who know nothing but trapping down men with fucking pregnancies."

Stella was shocked. She thought that Keegan was spewing nonsense since he was drunk. "I can't believe you can make stuff up like that just to sleep with me," she pinched his face and whispered. "I'm telling you the truth. I had a vasectomy years ago," Keegan said solemnly. Stella dismissed his words and said, "Where's the scar then? You claim to have had a vasectomy years ago. We were still married then, so how come I never saw any of your scars? Are vasectomies nowadays so advanced?"

His voice dipped. “Why the mood?” I teased. “Because having your sweet walls clench me raw is divine. It’s a bliss I want forever.” he whispered, nibbling my ears. Heat rushed beneath my cheeks and between my legs again. Just his words had me wet. “I know, right? I enjoyed it too,” I drawled. “So… get a vasectomy.” I joked. “Okay,” he shrugged, eyes on the ceiling. “Okay?” I blinked. Shocked. Most men wouldn’t even joke about that.

(That was the little joke I made up to lighten the mood in my head. I found one story that had seven chapters. It was called "The Vasectomy". It was about a girl and her father, of course. Her dad wanted to have a vasectomy, and she ended up going with him to the clinic. Once they got there, her dad got cold feet. They somehow managed to get into a room where he could lie down before the procedure. The daughter (Daniel) innocently convinces her dad that masturbating might help put him at ease. And that leads to her ultimately doing the job for him. It was such a hot scene, my pussy was completely drenched after just the first chapter. (I had to change tampons frequently while I read through

I sighed. “I am sorry, Kai,” Ty mumbled as he hugged me closer to his chest. “There is nothing to apologize, babe. I guess you are right. We should both get a vasectomy done. I don’t want you to get pregnant too when you play bottom,” I teased. “Yeah we all know that’s not gonna happen,” Ty chuckled. “And as for the vasectomy, I do agree. There is no love with rubber glove,” he sang out and I couldn’t help but giggle at my silly mate.