Novel & Cerita Here I Am Once Again Torn Into Pieces

I try to forget it every time I see you, I see you I thought I could do it without it Now I know I need you, I need you This is turning into some kind of fucking amnesia, I need you Memories fade away Love is so crazy So break me and do it again tomorrow I almost forgot who we are I'll let you drive me crazy for another day Isn't this love madness, madness? Yeah... His fingers stopped playing the piano, he slowly moved them away, looking at the keyboard as his tears fell onto it. He touched the keys, frowning, his gaze fixed on one of the photographs. He took it in his hands and simply threw it towards the large window, watching it fall outside. He ran his hands through his hair, gasping, fa

“Piece by piece. Like I don’t even know what’s real anymore.” His jaw tightened. “Then I’ll hold the pieces until you find yourself again.” The simplicity the devotion nearly broke me. I closed my eyes, but tears still spilled out. I hated that they did. I hated how helpless I felt. I hated that a voice from the past could still control the rhythm of my heartbeat. “I’m supposed to be stronger than this,” I whispered. “This was my second chance. I had everything under control and now” “You don’t have to be strong right now.”

I just stood there, frozen, watching the life I thought I had built, shatter into a million pieces. Finally, I found my voice, though it was jagged and weak. “Jeff?”

Something broken, fragile. Something I had ruined.

So close to slipping away. In the changing room, I tear off the ruined dress with trembling hands. The fabric pools at my feet like the remnants of my destroyed life. I pull on my scrubs, the material offering the smallest feel of normalcy. My reflection stares back at me; golden-amber eyes puffy and shattered, dark hair falling messily around my face, cheeks streaked with dried tears. I look broken. I ‘am’ broken. But his life is on the line, and right now, that is all that matters.

I might be a possible vessel for the very thing that had destroyed me. "Get it out!" I screamed, the sound tearing from my lungs until my throat felt raw. "Get it out of me!" My mother tried to reach for me, but I was too fast. I grabbed a jagged shard of the shattered ceramic mug from the floor. I was not the healer anymore. I was a cornered animal trying to cut the rot out of its own side. I pressed the sharp edge against my stomach, my hands shaking with a violent, frantic energy. The cabin door flew open with a bang.

I won’t hesitate and I definitely won’t lose. “Break it.” The voice again. Closer now. Not around me. Inside me. “I already did,” I whisper. My fingers twitch. But they don’t feel like mine. Not completely. Not anymore. “Not enough,” it replies. Of course not. It’s never enough. Pain lingers in my bones— No— What’s left of them. Because something changed when I hit that ground. Something cracked. And something else— Slipped in. “You’re still holding on,” it says.

Could it break the chains of his past and create something beautiful from the ruins? My heart felt so heavy, I couldn’t help it. It torn me between what I wanted and what made sense. Riccardo, the man who had once shattered my world into a million irreparable pieces, had somehow found his way back into my thoughts, igniting a spark of hope against my better judgment.

My pieces are still falling apart. The only difference is that I’m trying to make it through this darkness. I am trying to get back all those pieces that once belonged together. I’m crawling on the shards of glass called life and I believe I’ll make it through if only I just keep breathing. I am my daddy’s Celeste after all.

It got stuck in my throat. I'm breaking apart. Snapping loose. And I have no idea how I can hold myself together.