How To Critique A Story

Piper gave up her dream and served as waitress to raise her sister's abandoned baby. She bumped into her prince EX, Nicholas, in the crazy Luna choosing game. Nicholas: How could you hide my little girl?! Piper: EXM? She's not yours! Nicholas: You had a child with someone else right after we broke up?!

He’s the alpha king, my crush, my guardian. And he’s 20 years older than me. ** “How old are you?” “T-Twenty,” I bit my lower lip, stuttering on the lie. “I’m an adult.” I trembled but turned my head, allowing him to drag his nose along my neck and breathe in my scent. I didn’t know what I smelled like to him. Did I smell like I was lying? I held still. He shifted just a bit, seemingly retreating, and I flung my arms around his neck, holding him down. “Please, Alpha King,” I said. My voice trembled even as I tried to sound sultry. “I’m… sure I can please you.” “Do you know what happens when you lie to the Alpha King, little girl?” He knew. I should have known that he would know I wasn’t twenty. “You seem so deliberate, but I’m not interested in your offer. How about we play a game?” “A-A game?” He narrowed his eyes and gave me a slow, cruel smile. “If you win, I’ll grant you sanctuary.” My eyes widened with a spark of hope. “But if you lose….”

After I was reborn, the first thing I did was bind my daughter, Maia Howell, and a seriously sick pig to a pain-transfer system. In my last life, when Maia was born, her skin was covered with sores. This caused her so much pain that she would often cry all night. My husband, Bruno Howell, told me he'd found a pain-transfer system that could save Maia, but it could only bind to another woman. For my daughter, I didn't hesitate—I bound the system and shifted Maia's rotten wounds onto myself. When Maia regained her health, Bruno dragged a stranger to me and said, "Claire is the one I've always loved. The part about the system only binding to women? That was a lie to trick you!" Maia shoved me to the ground in disgust and joined them. "Look at you, all covered in sores—how could you even be my mom? I’ll let you in on a secret. The night your daughter was born, Dad swapped me with her. To make you willingly bind to the system with me, I had to call you 'Mom' for ten years! Makes me sick even thinking about it!" They left me locked in the house to starve to death. When I opened my eyes again, I was back at the moment Bruno was convincing me to bind to the pain-transfer system.

Hazel was ready for a proposal in Las Vegas, but got the shock of her life when her boyfriend confessed his love for her sister instead. Heartbroken, she ended up marrying a stranger. The next morning, his face was just a blur. Back at work, the plot thickened when she discovered the new CEO was none other than her mystery Vegas husband?! Now, Hazel's got to figure out how to navigate this unexpected twist in both her personal and professional life ...

On the day of the mating ceremony, I'm supposed to be marked by William Ernst and become the Luna of the Shadow pack. However, Annie Denver, my younger twin sister, suddenly comes back from abroad. Dad, Mom, and William end up abandoning me, choosing to pick her up from the airport. While Annie posts a family photo on Facebook, flaunting how everyone in the family loves her, my family cuts me off whenever I try to contact them through mind-link. They end up closing the mind-link. After calling countless times, William finally accepts my call and asks me to stop rushing him. He tells me that today's mating ceremony is canceled and will be rescheduled on another date. My dearest parents, brother, and the man I love the most all turn me into the laughingstock of the entire pack—and the most ridiculous bride of all. Despite being laughed at, I didn't cry or make a scene. After taking care of everything, I write a number in my journal—the 99th time. This is the 99th time they have disappointed me. From this moment on, I won't beg for their love anymore. I fill out an application for Arcetic expedition, ready to leave them. They all think that my silence and constant compromises with Annie mean I've matured. They fail to realize that I'm disappointed to the core. I am leaving for good.

When you give up your dream job for an abandoned baby at your doorstep,Five years later, a mysterious billionaire sends you to the police station?!Him: How dare you steal my daughter?!Turns out, his daughter and your adopted girl are twins?And now, you're forced to move into his mansion...

The housekeeper deliberately reveals her busty chest when I'm out of the house. She says coquettishly to my husband, "Oh, my. This is an accident, Mr. Houston …" My husband looks like he's focusing on his drink, but he keeps sneaking looks at her. I see all of this from the housekeeper's livestream.

On the first day of classes, my roommate gives me a crystal bracelet as a welcome gift. Without thinking, I quickly adorn it around her mother's wrist. In my past life, my roommate wanted to be a social butterfly. She was determined to have a hundred boyfriends by the time she graduated. But no matter how reckless she was, she never ended up conceiving. On the other hand, I kept getting pregnant and having countless miscarriages. But unlike her, I had never been in a relationship. The entire university mocked me, labeling me promiscuous and shameless. During my 66th miscarriage, I died on the operating table from severe bleeding. It was only after death that I realized the crystal bracelet my roommate gave me had somehow linked our wombs together. As soon as I opened my eyes, I realized I had gone back to the first day of the semester.

Upon hearing about my husband's surgery, I braved a typhoon and torrential rain, driving four hours back to the city. When I arrived at the hospital, my husband, Xander Gray, was lying on the hospital bed, calling out loudly, "I want my wife! Get my wife here!" His buddies around him joked about how his wife had him completely whipped. Everyone said he loved me to death. Blushing, I walked over with a happy smile and held his hand, saying, "I'm here." To my surprise, he shook off my hand in disgust and snarled, "Get lost! You're not my wife! My wife is Beverly Long!"

My son was caught in a car accident. My husband said that without a cornea donor, he would be trapped in darkness forever. Heartbroken, I let him sweet-talk me into signing away my corneas. Blind, I overheard my son gloating, "Dad, the plan worked. Mom fell for it, and Rachel's got her sight back. She won't be miserable anymore." "Yeah, now we're a real family with her," replied my husband. The truth gutted me. They'd played me like a fool to save my husband's old flame. When I confronted them, Rachel Huffman shoved me down a staircase, and I died in agony. But when I opened my eyes again, I was back on the day of my son's car accident.