I'm Not Okay

Broken and shattered, Andre Torello contemplated suicide. Love failed him, it pierced his heart and left him bleeding. There's nothing left to hold on to, nothing is left when love has failed him. His fiancee left him, she kept him waiting while she walked the aisle with a richer man. He thought love was stronger than wealth and riches, he'd always believed that nothing can break love but it's all a fallacy. But what if love is waiting at the door? What if all he needed to do was glance in a different direction, but it was too late, Andre concluded. There's no love anywhere again. He'd been shattered by love; he is not ready to give in to its deception anymore. Love is cruel. But more than a lost love, something else was waiting, a throne and a lover and Andre Torello had only one option, accept it or get ruined forever.

Hanya sepenggal kisah sepasang sahabat berbeda jenis yang berakhir cinta. “Gue ngerasa sinting dengan apa yang gue rasain saat ini. Gue bingung. Gue enggak tahu sejak kapan, tapi yang jelas gue sayang banget sama dia. Setiap melihatnya gue merasa ... lengkap? Enggak ngertilah gue. Pokoknya sesuatu seperti itu. Kayak ketika lo lagi nyusun puzzle, terus kepingan terakhir lo hilang. Saat lo sudah menyerah, tiba-tiba lo bisa nemuin kepingan terakhir itu. Lo ngerasa bahagia karena akhirnya puzzle lo bisa lengkap.”

Rima: Jacob Snow is a puzzle. I had initially mistaken him for a cold, uncaring, and arrogant CEO, but as we work together, I realize he's the exact opposite. He's warm, considerate, and humble, a far cry from the man I had painted in my mind. But acknowledging this doesn't mean I'm ready to let my guard down. My past is a dark, haunting shadow, and I refuse to let anyone get too close, afraid of the potential pain that could follow. It's been a while since I've felt this way about someone, and the familiarity of these feelings scares me. The last time it ended being the worst mistake of my life. I don't want to give in to these feelings, but I can't deny that Jacob is becoming more than just a boss to me. Jacob: Rima is enigmatic. She’s resilient, determined, and initially, she appears distant. But as we collaborate, I find myself drawn to her strength and determination. She’s unlike anyone I’ve ever met, and the spark between us is undeniable. She’s built a fortress around herself, a wall that's impossible to penetrate, but I’m determined to break it down. I sense she’s hiding something, and I can’t shake off the protective instinct that emerges whenever I see her. As we confront the danger together, I find myself struggling to resist the growing feelings I have for her. As danger looms, Rima and Jacob find themselves struggling to resist the growing attraction between them. Their pasts threaten to tear them apart, but they can’t deny the feelings that are blossoming between them. Will they be able to overcome their fears and trust each other? Or will their pasts continue to haunt them and prevent them from finding love?

Everyone in the pack knew I was in love with the Alpha, Luther Pauley. I had done whatever it took to win him over, even sneaking into his bed more than once. When I turned 18, the pack's seer predicted that Luther was my destined mate. But I refused the marking ceremony and chose to leave the pack instead. Luther looked stunned as he blocked my way out. "If you walk away now, don't ever come back." No one in the pack believed I would really go. They were even making bets about how soon I'd crawl back. "I'm calling three days!" "You're giving her too much credit. I'll wager a bottle of healing tonic that she'll be running back here in three minutes!" I ignored them and went straight to Sawyer Dunn, the Alpha of Graymoon Pack. This time, I swore I would never look back again.

"Why aren't you ready for me?" His voice cut through the darkness, sharp as a blade. His hands gripped my hips, fingers digging into soft flesh. "How often do I have to tell you about the rules?" "I'm sorry," I whispered, my throat tight. "I was sick again today, and work was—" "Excuses." He ripped away my underwear, the fabric tearing. "You smell like a kitchen maid. Disgusting." I bit my lip until I tasted blood, fighting back tears. Three years. Three years of being his unwanted wife, forced on him by his grandfather's deal. The old man's words still echoed: "You saved my life, child. Let me give you a good life in return." ***** Five years ago, Elena thought she’d left her nightmare behind. Forced into a loveless marriage with the ruthless Nikolai Ashford, she endured his cold accusations and cruel indifference. But when their toxic relationship threatened the life of her unborn child, she vanished, reinventing herself as Mia Thompson—a confident heiress with a powerful empire of her own. Now, Mia’s carefully rebuilt world is crumbling. One of her twins is gravely ill, and the only hope for survival lies in Nikolai, the man who shattered her heart. Returning to his world isn’t just a desperate gamble to save her child—it’s a chance to exact the revenge she’s dreamed of for years.

I came back to life the day Cedric Gramont got drugged. This time? I didn't offer my body to him. I called his so-called soulmate instead. In my last life, I stupidly fell for the uncle who wasn't blood-related. When I found out he'd been hit with something strong, I ignored his plea to call Elyna Humbert—and "helped" him myself. A month later, I was pregnant. He had to marry me. On our wedding day, Elyna, who'd gone abroad to "clear her head," got kidnapped and killed. Before she died, she called Cedric 199 times, begging for help. He didn't pick up once. Too busy sealing the deal with me. Later, he just stared at those missed calls, not saying a word. Then the day I went into labor, he locked me in the basement. I begged him to take me to the hospital. He just smiled, cold and empty, and watched me die screaming, the baby still inside me. Last thing I heard? "If you hadn't gotten pregnant, I wouldn't have married you. I wouldn't have missed Elyna's calls. You deserved to die." When I opened my eyes again, it was that same day—Cedric was drugged, but this time, I knew better.

I was reborn. Right back to the day I adopted Peter. The wind cut sharp, baby cries slicing through the cold. That's when it hit me—this was the day Stuart Pete, my oh-so-loving husband, dumped his illegitimate child right in my path after work. He knew me too well. The second I picked the kid up, he'd spin it into an adoption, making the boy ours. Last time, I fell for it. This time? I walked away without a second thought. Later, I heard the kid got pneumonia from being left out in the freezing cold—fever so bad, it wrecked him for life. I laughed until my stomach hurt. What I didn't see coming? Peter was reborn too—about to experience the life he was meant to have.

I wasn’t even pregnant, yet I ended up popping abortion pills like they were candy. It was all because in my past life, the moment my widowed sister-in-law got pregnant, every single side effect of her pregnancy became mine. She strutted around happily with her big belly, consuming spicy tamales, while I was rushed to the hospital for violent nausea and stomach pain; she showed off her flawless skin in crop tops every day, while my stomach broke out in hideous stretch marks. When I told my husband what was happening, he just shoved me away impatiently. “Enough with the jealousy! My brother’s dead, and she’s carrying his only child. Of course, I should look out for her. Do you really have to put on such an act?” After that, my sister-in-law went even further. She kept testing her limits during pregnancy and even ate a mango she was allergic to. And me? I went into anaphylactic shock, landed in the hospital, and nearly died. Doctors couldn’t explain it. They just brushed it off, saying I was overly jealous and it was all psychological. Later, my sister-in-law tried to brand herself as a “hot single mom”. She went live, belly and all, to show off her weight-loss workouts. She jumped around for three straight hours. And me? My uterus literally gave out, and I hemorrhaged to death. When I opened my eyes again, it was the exact day she first announced her pregnancy.

The first time I lived, my sister and I found two dragon eggs. The black one pulsed with raw, untamed power. My sister, Isabella, claimed it without a second thought. The white one was left for me. A cracked, forgotten thing. It held only a whisper of magic. I took it out of pity. Within a year, the black dragon shattered his shell and emerged a man so beautiful it was a curse. He became Isabella's devoted weapon, his power forging her path to godhood. Meanwhile, the white egg fed on me. I poured everything I had into my white egg. My magic, my money, my soul. For ten long years, it gave me nothing. Everyone said to abandon it. But I couldn’t. I was an orphan, ignored by my sister. I just wanted a companion. But as the dark plague swept the lands, the egg I'd nurtured for a decade hatched overnight—while I was dying, he soared past me to save Isabella. He could have hatched years ago. Could have been human all along. But he chose Isabella. He mistook her for his savior. Then I was back to the day it all began. This time, Isabella lunged for the white egg first, afraid I'd take it. I slung my worn satchel of herbs over my shoulder. Turned my back on them both. "You can have them both," I said calmly. "I choose myself." This life, I swore I would have nothing to do with Adrian. But now, he's the one filled with regret, willing to give his own life just to have me look at him one more time.

After years of living abroad without children, I decided to return home to handle my inheritance matters. However, before I could step into my house, I was stopped by a group of people at the entrance. The woman leading the group pointed at me and started screaming. "I can't believe someone as young as you is seducing a man old enough to be your father! How disgusting can you be?" I watched her, noticing how much she resembled my older brother, and I was shaking with rage. They pulled out my fingernails, broke my ribs, and slashed my face, dragging me around the neighborhood as I begged for mercy. Yet, they remained indifferent to my pleas. Just as I was on the verge of losing hope, my brother, Edward Grange rushed over.  Through a mouthful of blood, I managed to choke out, "Ed, I’d rather die than let her inherit my inheritance…”