Jingle Bells Spoof Novels & Stories

Poor Gideon with his witch metabolism is a little better than a human in these situations. Which is why he is on the floor in my living room sleeping it off under the card table. Barry and I just got drunk enough to make him want to stay in the spare bedroom. And while all of this explains the headache, none of this explains why my ears are not just ringing, but ringing in a rhythm. “Ring-a-ling…hear them ring…” The bells are ringing in harmony. With a Christmas song. Only one person I know would be that damn annoying just for fun.

The Drunk March 29, 2009 LUCILLE "Whoa! I feel good, tanan na-nan-nana-nan. I knew that I would, now" James Brown's voice echoed throughout the hallway. Shocked, I hurried to cancel the call. "Hey, Cool song. Sorry. Just wanted to make sure you gave me your real number." Jasper said. He put his phone back in his pocket.

Christ, I forgot to tell you, guess what", Janelle screamed. "Chill... calm down, what's the good news all about", Steff said. Janelle twirled with her short curly hair, "you don't want to guess, please guess", She begged. "You are finally going to sing in a choir?", Steff asked. I quickly picked a pillow and threw it at her face, she reached for it immediately, "Why. Would. You. Do. That?", she shouted. "What's the meaning of choir, do I look so churchy to you?", Janelle bawled.

She liked to think that her horrible attempts at singing encouraged the children to sing a bit louder, even if they were just trying to drown her out. “It’s... looking.” Molly frowned, as she thought back on the childrens' attempt to sing Jingle Bells, which had somehow turned into an utter fiasco. “We’ll just need a few more practices. Maybe a few more weeks. Honestly, maybe we should just postpone the choir’s performance until next Christmas.” Hannah opened her mouth to respond, but the chime sounded from her shop’s front door. She turned her attention towards the source of the sound and smiled. “Hi there! Welcome to Sweetness & Light!”

a man in a blindingly green elf getup informed me, jiggling the silver-wrapped horror in my face. I blinked at him. "She sings?" He nodded, much too enthusiastically. "Tchaikovsky's 'Waltz of the Flowers' in four variations." I blinked again. "You're frightening, you know that?" He just grinned like it was a compliment. I gave in and bought the accursed thing. For whom? No idea. Maybe it could be a decent present for . She seemed the type who would find an outrageously melodramatic decoration to her liking. The mall was replaying Mariah Carey for the tenth time in an hour, and each turn I took resulted in more glitter, fake snow, and wailing children. I was trudging along with four bags, rem

Madeline's voice sounded a little rushed. "I think I've had too much to drink," I slurred, faking it. "When are you coming back?" "Soon, just give me… fifteen more minutes," her voice was muffled, like she was trying to hold something back. Then I heard it. A man's low, teasing laugh. And the soft, metallic jingle of something—jingle, jingle—like the little bells on a piece of lingerie or a sex toy. "Madeline? Where are you?" I kept my voice laced with concern.

I'd been waiting for an opportunity to change that, but I never thought that would come while I stood at the altar. Armani barely nodded, adjusting his grip around my fingers. We glanced at the officiant at the same time, silently asking him to begin the fake ceremony. I wondered if it was real to him. The officiant cleared his throat loudly. "We are gathered here today to witness the union of the Cartelli and the Rizzo family." Not the loving union of two people.

she said. "What thing," Ava said flatly. "The thing where he talks and everyone laughs. He just said something about the scheduling conflict." Ava went very still. "He said what?" "He made a joke about the slot situation. Something about how they got the smaller room but at least they didn't have to share a stage with anyone who'd critique their timing." Mia turned from the wall. "The room lost it, Ava. Like completely lost it." Sofia, to her credit, did not say anything. She looked at Ava with the careful attention of someone monitoring a situation for signs of escalation.

I can even hear the grumble in my own voice. Jingle Bar is the worst bar in Troping. Lucky for us, it also happens to be the only bar. It’s decorated for Christmas year-round like the rest of the town, but this place got stuck in 1975 and hasn’t budged since. The worst part is all the decorations are creepy as fuck, like something your grandmother made you put out every year no matter how much it scared the kids. Oh, and there’s karaoke, which makes this officially the last place I’d ever want to be on a Friday night. It’s not like there’s a lot going on in town, but this isn’t my first or fifteenth choice for entertainment in Troping. Jingle Bar falls right below visiting the fish hatchery

Zack's Pov. I'm home from school now. What my monkey friends make me do is tiring. They said they wanted me to prank Angel with my stretches and also to show him my sweetness. Suppose I pretend to be sweet to her hmm. If there was no real punishment, I wouldn't do that because I know that woman likes me and I don't like her. Then they say that I will dance on the ground naked when I don't do that. ***** I called Zyrone first to find out when I would stop what they were doing. It was annoying