Novel & Cerita Jokes That Will Make You Pee

"Unbelievable! My virtuous daughter-in-law wants to become my mistress. I must be dreaming." Watching Edrick pretending to be all surprised, I wanted nothing but the ground to open up and swallow me whole. "I am truly willing to do anything you want," I desperately said. "Suck my d**k. I need to check the product before I buy it, right?" The playful expression on Edrick's face faded as he spoke with an intimidating tone. "What!" I gasped. On the day Elaira got married, she was kidnapped by her ex Edrick from whom she ran away five years ago while being pregnant and discovered that Edrick was her husband's father. On top of that, Elaira's husband tried to give her away to his father as a price for getting acknowledgement as his heir. After knowing that she was just a pawn in her husband's scheme for inheritance and becoming her father-in-law's mistress overnight who will she choose? Her treacherous husband or formidable ex who wants Elaira to give birth to his child even though she is now his daughter-in-law!

[Heartbreak to Payback] The day she found out she was pregnant again, Sabrina Chatsworth also discovered that her husband had built a new life with the scholarship student she had once supported. While she was grieving the loss of her twins, growing thinner by the day, Luther William had been celebrating the birth of his illegitimate son with his mistress. The company Sabrina had built from the ground up had already been taken over by that woman. Even the house she thought was their one and only marital home had been recreated by Luther for them. In that moment, whatever love she had left disappeared, leaving only bitterness. Sabrina quietly put away the pregnancy report and filed for divorce without hesitation. Luther’s voice turned cold and commanding. “Sabrina, if you regret this and ask me now, I can pretend that divorce agreement never existed.” Sabrina simply turned and walked away. “Mr. William, I’ll see you at the lawyer’s office.” Later, the man who once held all the power was the one forced to bow his head. Standing before the radiant, confident Sabrina, Luther was filled with regret as he begged her to look at him again. Her face was still as striking as ever, but her smile was distant. “Mr. William, you’re too late. I’ll never fall for you again.”

At the afterparty, my daughter, Mia Volpe, suffers from a sudden asthma attack. She collapses to the carpeted floor and goes through a seizure on the spot. But my Capo husband, Lorenzo Volpe, wraps an arm around his secretary, Sophia Bianchi, while watching Mia suffer before his eyes. Sophia had once shown him a forged paternity test of Mia and him. As such, he firmly believes that Mia is the bastard child of me and a Soldato. When Mia tries to reach out for Lorenzo, her complexion already bluish-purple from suffocation, he merely averts his gaze with a disgusted look on his face. "Daddy… S-Save… me…" I look everywhere for Mia's inhaler like a madwoman, only to realize that it's already empty. Sophia covers her mouth while tittering softly. "Dear me, Mia sure has an affinity for acting! Elena, I can't believe you and your daughter are willing to go to such lengths just to get Lorenzo to pay attention to you! "Since Mia likes acting that much, she might as well make the performance perfect." She lifts a high-heeled foot before crushing Mia's fingers, which were attempting to curl around Lorenzo's pant leg. Poor Mia was in so much pain, yet she couldn't let out a single sound. All she could do was scream silently into the void with her mouth wide open. I kneeled on the floor, my forehead already bleeding from smashing it against the floor repeatedly. "Lorenzo Volpe, Mia is your flesh and blood! Please, I'm begging you! Give me some medicine or call a doctor!" But Lorenzo just looks at me coldly, as though he's looking at trash. "A bastard like her is better off dead. Elena Corleone, stop using such underhanded methods to spoil everyone's mood." At that moment, what little love I still harbor for this man completely dissipates as I feel Mia's heartbeat gradually weaken. I no longer beg him for help. With trembling hands, I press the button on the emergency transmitter that I've sworn I'd never touch. That transmitter is the direct line to the highest authority in Smeraldia—my father, Don Vito Corleone.

Robert Schmidt's company is on the verge of bankruptcy. He decides to get a divorce from me in order to not drag me down. I refuse to divorce him. Since then, I work during daytime and take on part-time jobs at night just so I can help Robert tide over the financial crisis. Heck, I even work eight jobs per day. But when I head over to Robert's company to seek him out with the money that I've painstakingly gathered, I accidentally overhear his conversation with his assistant, Ellie Gordon. "Robert, when are you going to divorce that hag? I can't wait any longer!" "I didn't know she'd be this hard to shake off! I already lied to her about my bankruptcy, and yet she still refused to divorce me!" Only then do I find out that Robert isn't bankrupt at all. He's just pretending to be bankrupt so that he can divorce me and give Ellie a proper title by his side. I end up dying from an aneurysm that gets triggered from my overwhelming fury. After my death, Robert has the gall to use the money I've worked so hard in earning on buying Ellie jewelry and a house. Later on, they have a whirlwind marriage and live happily ever after. As for me, I don't even get laid to rest in a proper graveyard. My corpse is left rotting somewhere unknown. When I open my eyes again, I've returned to the day Robert pretends to be bankrupt. This time, I sign the divorce agreement without hesitation. On top of that, I also apply for a patent before reporting Robert's company for infringing my copyright on the products. Since he likes pretending to be bankrupt that much, I might as well make his wish come true!

~ Zara Natusha Putri According to my Mom, the new neighbor was still single, handsome, hot, rich, and kind. But I don't think so. Why? Because there is nothing special about him and he is very annoying. Coupled with his perverted brain that makes me want to chop his body into small pieces. Oh come on, I can't stand all this. ~Bryan Samuel Clivton Even that girl doesn't know who I really am. We'll see, once you know and remember everything, you will feel at home, Zara.

After being saved from Mr. Stone, the one who used her as his personal slave, Clair faces days of PTSD. However she is too shy and anxious to share her problems with her well wishers. And to make things worse, she meets Levi, some one who she falls for. However, she refrains herself from dating him because she fears ruining it. Levi is adamant on winning the girl of his dreams, despite the hurdles in front of him. There was one moment that he thought he had won her. That his dreams had finally come true. However, life had other plans for them. Will they ever be able to over come her fear and face her troubles? Will they be able to overcome the troubles that life throws at them and finally be together?

It took me ten years to become the right hand to Damian Costello, the Consigliere of the Costello crime family. From a nobody to the woman wearing his engagement ring. But two weeks before the wedding, I decided to throw that ring away. Everyone in the family knew how hard I had fought all these years just to stand by Damian's side. I gave up the chance to become a top trader on Wall Street, willingly becoming Damian's assistant, his shadow. This man was infamous for his coldness and exacting nature, keeping everyone at arm's length. So I hid my sharp edges, spending a decade wearing down his icy exterior with gentleness. I cleansed the blood from every dollar he made. I became a necessity to him, as essential as the air he breathed. I thought that after ten years, I had finally made my presence indispensable. And finally earned what looked, to outsiders, like a glimmer of his affection. The family's notoriously aloof genius actually remembered my birthday. He even made an exception, letting me spend the night in his private study when I was unwell. He didn't even push me away when, emboldened by wine, I pressed a kiss to the side of his neck. If the Don's daughter, Isabella, hadn't returned from Italy, I might have kept playing my part, clinging to that false dream forever. But sadly, there are no ‘ifs’. I am going to give up everything here and leave you.

Eleven was born into a happy family, but all had to end when her mother died and her father became a drunkard and gambler. Being abused by her own father made Eleven feel traumatized by men. Her life is just cooped up in a small flat together with the humans she hates the most. Until one day, someone came to take her away from that place, her father sold his own daughter to pay off all his debts at the most dangerous bookies. Eleven, who was desperate with her dark life, tried to end her own life, but her plan had to end in vain. When the son of a bookie found her lying almost unconscious from bleeding. Love never knows time and place, when their eyes are locked, that's when the universe unites their feelings.

"You have been a very bad girl wife"...Alyssa Jones is in love with Carl Miller for as long as she can remember.Dalton Miller is in love with Alyssa for as long as he can remember.What will happen when their parents decided to marry Alyssa with Dalton who is her best friend and in love with her and Carl with Amara, Alyssa's sister?Will Alyssa accept her best friend as her husband or will she continue to love Carl?Will Dalton make Alyssa fall in love with him? Relationships will get messy. Hearts will break but among all these will Alyssa be able to find her one true love?

They swore to destroy each other. Then he whispered: "A deal is a deal. Tonight, you belong to me." Hockey captains Damian Volkov and Sebastian Montgomery have been locked in a brutal three‑year rivalry. On the ice, they try to break each other. Off the ice, they trade threats in darkened hallways. But when Sebastian finally wins the championship with a bone‑crushing hit, he collects a secret debt Damian doesn't remember making. That night, in the shadows of the locker room, Sebastian reveals a blood oath sworn on his father's grave: One day I'll own you. The price? One night of absolute surrender. No rules. No safe word. Damian expects cruelty. Instead, Sebastian drags him to the abandoned rink where Damian's father used to beat him. He forces Damian to skate until his feet bleed—then bandages the wounds with unexpected gentleness. Every command is a twisted therapy. Every touch blurs the line between hatred and obsession. But someone is watching. A blackmailer has a video of their most intimate moment. Damian's father is faking a stroke to manipulate him. And the journalist who shot them is just the beginning. As the league tries to ban them, as friends become enemies, as a bullet arrives with a note that says "Game seven. You're dead," Damian and Sebastian must decide: Is their bond a trap—or the only thing that can save them? When hatred bleeds into obsession, who will be the first to surrender?