Kickass Humour Novels & Stories

Ashley She had to be who her job wanted her to be, a killer. She had to become emotionless but will she find someone who will make her care again? Will she ever find love? Will her job lead her to happiness? Jake He was a hot multi-millionaire. He was a renowned businessman who took over his parent's company after their death. He's going to do everything in his means to find his missing sister and those who kidnapped her would pay. Will revenge bring love to him? Master Everything is more or less a game of chess to him. Apart from running an organization that trains people to kill, he also thinks it's right to control people's lives as he deems fit. He thinks himself to be fate in his demented mind.

“I’ll agree to this—but only if you stay out of my business.” “You have a deal,” the man chuckled, raising his hands in mock surrender, his husky voice dripping with amusement. “But,” he added, stepping closer, his breath brushing against her ear, “you’ll have to agree to my conditions, too.” “I said I’d agree, didn’t I?” Sherry replied coolly. Her expression didn’t waver as she grabbed his collar and pulled him down to her eye level. “Mr. Smith,” she whispered, matching his tone with a quiet fierceness. Hah… This woman is going to drive me insane, Levian thought, already realizing this would be far from easy. ~~~ On her wedding day, Sherry is poisoned by her best friend. Her fiancé? At the hospital, he was celebrating the birth of his child with someone else. But fate rewinds the clock. Waking up a day before her death, Sherry has one goal: uncover the truth and take back control. However, as the secrets unravel, she realizes the betrayal runs deeper than she imagined. That's when the rumored Levian Smith makes her an offer: “Marry me, and I’ll stake my very soul for you.” Now, she must choose—revenge or redemption?

The winter season turns out well for Zoey Smith, a twenty-four-year-old who holds the town's safety in her hands has a dark secret until someone by the name of Alexander Griffin, a rich, sadistic vampire who knows her secret decides to turn her life upside down, these two will now have to live together. Will there be bloodshed or love between these two? Sneak Peek: “I have a proposition for you.", he said as he sat back down and crossed his legs. “And if I don't want to sign it or have anything to do with you? What then?", she snapped back. Zoey was the type to always fight back. She was never the type to take a no for an answer. “Your reputation as a vigilante will be exposed and above all…your father will die at your hands. All because of your stupidity and selfishness of taking up a mask to wear at night yet you don't even think about the consequences” “What is the proposition?", she muttered under her breath gently. “Oh well, you will stay here with me, in this mansion with me.” “Why do you want me to stay here?!", she questioned in confusion. “Do you remember the night before? On the alleyway, you killed my cousin.” She choked on her tea as she heard this and tried to hide her laughter.”Oh….I'm sorry…but on a serious note, he was not a nice person. He kidnapped and murdered children.” He sat next to her and started to talk, "You're right, he deserved it", he chuckled.“Please consider the proposition.”

POWERS SERIES (BOOK TWO) ”I’m only here until my father’s debt is paid. I’m not your property,” I said, though my voice faltered under his piercing gaze. Owen smirked, stepping closer, his voice a low, dangerous growl. “Funny, because the moment you stepped into my territory, you became my property, mia cara, and I do not let go of what’s mine until I’ve taken everything I’m owed—and more.” Mae has spent her entire life trying to clean up her father’s messes. But when his largest debt lands her in the hands of Owen, the most feared Mafia Don in the country, her life takes a maddening turn. Owen built his empire on blood, power, and his unwavering belief that family is nothing but a weakness. Mae’s fierce loyalty and willingness to risk everything to protect her deadbeat father—and track down the mother who abandoned her—makes her more interesting than she already is. Trapped in a web of danger, desire, and impossible choices, Mae has to decide: How far will she go to save the people who’ve already let her down? And how long can she resist the pull of the man who claims to own her?

Blackmailed into substituting her step sister on her wedding night, Christine Carter sacrifices her first time to protect her father. Hunter Gray, the groom, is unaware that the one he is ravishing is not his real bride, and he's oblivious that his exquisite wedding night resulted in a pregnancy. Five years later, Hunter is a divorced man who's been in a dark place for two years, he happens to fall in love at first sight with Christine during a flight. Christine on the other hand is annoyed that he has the audacity to flirt with her, she only cares for her child. But what will Christine do when she'd find out that she needs to work closely with Hunter? And how will she hide the truth from her genius son? ~~~~~~~~~~ ‘His musky mint flavor intoxicates her senses and soothes her mind. Her body feels like it was fed with something she craved for a long time. “Mommy, daddy, not in front of the kids, go inside!” Ethan protests, pulling at their clothes and that's the instant she comes to her senses and tries to break the kiss.’ ~~~~~~~~~~ ‘"He is my daddy. How can I not insist? I want my daddy and my mommy together.” “He is not you daddy, sweetie.” She lies, waves of guilt washing over her. “I don't know why you are lying, mommy, but I can only assume you have your reasons. He is my daddy, I can tell."’ ~~~~~~~~~~ ‘"I want a big family, mommy!” Her angel cries out, interrupting her train of thought. “Did you and daddy make me a sister on your trip?"’

Over five years I’ve lived a bittersweet lie as David Hargrove’s kept woman, Maria Bell. David’s shown no interest in me beyond what he wants. Love’s a bitter pill to love when it's not returned. I'm bought and paid for. Kept in a gilded cage. David suspects nothing of the secrets I hold. Tonight, David announced he’s marrying my stepsister. He doesn’t know. The level of betrayal I’ve experienced is unbelievable. Everything becomes complicated as the lies surface. Leaving and facing it alone are my only choices. I’m living in fear as I pick up pieces of a life, I believed lost. Blackmail, sabotage, and intrigue dog my steps. I don’t know who I can trust or how to win. I won’t surrender without a fight this time. They don’t recognize me. They won’t see me coming. My name is David Hargrove, and someone is trying to destroy my family. I must marry my rival’s daughter. His stepdaughter signed the contract. Before we learned, she couldn’t deliver the Belgrave empire to me. She can help me secure my family’s empire as my fiancée. I need the ugly biological daughter, Maria Belgrave, who’s hiding. Things get confusing. Maria Belgrave sent two women to represent her. One is my Maria. My missing woman. The betrayal and conflict of interest still stand. I will say when our contract has ended. How can I work with her? I know nothing about her. She owes me answers and loyalty. Perhaps I’ll use this to my advantage. When David learns of Maria’s past life. Will he help her? Or use her and take over the business himself? It starts with an engagement and the death of a patriarch.

Imagine you planned to have your boyfriend kidnapped, delivered to your blindfolded and gagged. You fuck him, and pull the hood off after, only to be face to face with a stranger. That stranger, you quickly lean, is the Don of the Cosa Nostra. He's all too pleased to have taken part in your kidnap fantasy.

𝐈𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐳𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐬. It is about a woman finding her courage in this world. Upon finding it she craves to relinquish the feeling of always being on the edge of the cliff while being the one who solely helps her family from crumbling into pieces. She was hired by Alessandro as their Assassin in their mafia, but their hearts start to recognize the sparks igniting turning into the indomitable flames of their desires. Their fates are always not in favor, but can they test fate and vanquish the plague surrounding them. Or are they meant to dwindle and let it destroy them instead of being their salvation? ... “Gattina, I love it when you are in this position, you should do this more often. And the reason next time won't be picking up your black clutch.” She looked up and scowled with amusement dancing in her eyes. Mio Dio. “I bet you do. I look good in a lot of angles sir. But you won't be able to see if I will be performing one.”

The story starts with an accident that entangles two people together. One a singer who has no real family but became too successful despite many hardships. The other is a world class doctor who used to be a world class dancer. He also had many hardships with his family after the death of his grandmother. Now they both agree to help each other defeat their upcoming problems. Of course fate has more than that for them. "I am sorry " Daniel apologized sincerely . He still wasn't able to look at her . He was astonished by her accurate hypothesis. " Look me in the eye and say it " sera told him with a serious tone. He started to gather his confidence and looked at her with his grey eyes . He started messing his brown hair and said. "I was a dumbass and you can refuse to help me . I would deserve it .I will go tell them I was lying .I am sorry . I did something unacceptable after you trusted me".As soon as he finished talking he looked away from her blue eyes. Sera had a thought and said it out loud "I never thought you were handsome till today . You look like you have done something that you could kill youself for. I will help you for two reasons . First , I am going to need your help sooner or late and you know for what . Second , you are a good person you just wanted to prove your family wrong and I know that feeling . " Sera finished and her words touched and relieved Daniel's heart . Surprisingly Dennis was the one who responded " Sera , Daniel !! Why don't you try dating for real."

When the black sheep of the family meets the woman-hater mafia billionaire, is there a chance that Jada will find herself chained to the demon's heart? *** Jada Turner, the 20-year-old youngest daughter is always neglected by her family for an unknown reason, that’s why she just found herself hanging around with her friends, clubbing and drinking ‘til the sunrise. But in one night, the woman's life completely changes because of a bet dealt with her friends. She found herself inside an unfamiliar condominium which she discovered was owned by the wealthiest billionaire in the country, Achilles Coleman, the known woman-hater and a billionaire mafia leader. She managed to escape, but seeing the man inside her mansion again brought her back to chaos. Her world crumbled when this billionaire mafia accused her of trespassing and attempted murder. Jada's parents want to compromise as they don’t want to get involved in this and the company's name at risk. Achilles agreed, on one condition, he wants Jada to come with him. Why would a woman-hater want to take this feisty woman? Does Jada’s tattoo on her upper left arm have to do with this? Will that tattoo unveil the secret behind her real identity?