The Bully And Me
"You have the most beautiful skin, and your stomach is flat!"
"Just as flat as my breasts..."
"Stop!" Laura crosses the distance and gives me a "fake slap" with two fingers on my cheek. "Stop thinking about the bad and focus on the good, okay? You're kind. You're always smiling even though things are bad, and your heart is big enough to see the good in someone like Brandon—you're a total catch! Hell, I would marry you if I were a lesbian!"
"No, you wouldn't!"
"Would too," Laura nods at a painting leaning against the wall. "Now, are you going to show that thing to Brandon?"