Mom Quotes Funny

When my mom told me that her ex-best friend's son was going to be staying with us, I wasn't exactly expecting a 6'2 all muscle and tattooed godlike guy who looked like every girl's dream. Turns out, he was now my nightmare. Warning! Will contain mature scenes! This is a spinoff of the book TOUCH ME WHILE I TASTE YOU. I recommend reading it first as this book will have spoilers!

“Kayleigh, you will either take your pants off, or I’ll do it!” Alexander Hearst warned her. If her thighs were not swelling and in pain, this could probably lead to something else because the way he said it turned her on. “Then do it.” She could not take her joke back because he had already opened the button and pulled down the zipper of her pants. Carefully, he took her pants off, and she could hear him gasp as he carefully touched the red skin. He jolted when she yelped in pain. “What’s this, Kayleigh?” His voice was low and angry. She wished to tell him she was lucky her father did not hang her on the wall to punish her for getting married without telling them. It was an accidental marriage, only for convenience, but who would have thought she would be married to the stranger she met at the elevator, the gorgeous, sexually attractive, and the luscious man she had ever met.

Ace King, The most eligible bachelor of London. Being the number one eligible bachelor he didn't want to settle down. He is the CEO of King corporation. He has money, look, fame everything. Girls die to be with him. But for his arrogant nature no one dare to mess up with him. He is known for his arrogant nature and anger issues. In the business world he is known for his dominating way. His employees calls him workaholic devil behind his back. He was happy in his life until his eyes fell on Amelia, his new PA. Amelia Williams, A simple yet beautiful girl. 15 years ago, her dad met an accident and got paralyzed. After this Amelia saw her mom doing multiple jobs to buy her dad's medicine and their needs. When she got graduated she started searching for a job, so she could help her mother.

What happens when an all-business alpha planning to marry his chosen mating ceremony smells the most intoxicating fruity scent that belongs to his curvy mating ceremony planner. The confident plus size Ji'lahni Nelson, her two cousin and their best friend owns a successful Wedding planning company along with a dance self-defense workout studio, when they're asked by their new friend who is like a mother to them to plan her sons' wedding, I mean mating ceremony? What will happen when the sassy plus size women steps into a world of werewolves? Let's read to find out!

My name is Rose Bailey. I am seventeen years old and about to start my senior year of High school. I have always lived a normal, boring, human life. Never believed in the supernatural or the love at first sight sh#t that others girls my age fall for. That is until I move with my mom and two brothers back to the small town where my mom grew up. My mom makes us stay at this house or should I say castle with a lot of other people living their. Imagine my surprise when I walked in on a man and two women that looked to be 20 or 21 having in a room that looks like an office. Imagine how surprised I was when I was froze in place, unable to move as I felt a sharp pain in my chest from seeing them together as he one from behind while she leaned over a desk from pleasure and the other women was him. The man froze in place and looked at me with a guilty look on his face. The pain got worse in my chest and before I  blacked out I swore I heard him say Mate! 

Please be advised, words and scenes can be very, very steamy. This book is a collection of wild erotic adventures and fantasies. Adventures to some and fantasies to others. Sex is delicious. No one in their perverted mind will claim otherwise. So when a chance for a too good to be a true moment of one's life knocks at its door or when what happened a while ago was something you would never think it would have happened, some people grab these chances, while some regret it for a lifetime not indulging. A one-night stand or a quickie with a consenting individual is an easy fix.

"What do you want? What do you wish for?" "My wish is that you fall in love with me again." Taylor Wright's only wish was for the man she loves to treat her with love and respect, and a love that the world would envy, and that was why for years, she kept her feelings for Bryan Anderson a secret. Fortunately, the opportunity came, and an arranged marriage happened between them. Sadly, that was just the beginning of her suffering. 2 years later, Bryan got what he wanted and handed a divorce paper to her. He said, "You and I know how this marriage started. It's time for you to leave." One thing Taylor was taught by her mom was never to beg a man's love. With the remaining pieces of her heart shattered, she signs the divorce papers and walks out of his life without realizing she was pregnant. This was just the beginning. 3 years later, an unforeseen circumstance brings Taylor back to where it all started and the first person she encounters is her ex husband. "I want you back, Taylor." "Mr Bryan Anderson," There was a smirk on her face. "This was me a long time ago, but not anymore. Now, all I want is to see you suffer and beg for my love just like I did in the past." Now, the ball is in her court and it's time to play with the heart of the man she was once madly in love with. How does it really end when she's being betrayed for a second time?

Banished on the same day she was supposed to be made Luna of her pack, Sofia left heartbroken and found herself alone, battling depression. Just as she began to rebuild her life, she discovered she was pregnant with twins, carrying the legacy of her former mate, Nathan—the Alpha who betrayed her. In her darkest hour, she met Luca, a wealthy and renounced CEO, whose kindness and friendship helped her start anew. In a bold move to secure a better future for her children, she left the country with her babies to study at a renowned culinary school. Five years later, she was back! Back with her twins as a celebrated chef! But as time goes on, Alex, one of Sophia's twins, begins to show signs of shifting—awakening the werewolf bloodline within him and bringing the past crashing back. With the pack’s dangers resurfacing, Nathan reappears, desperate to reclaim his family after uncovering the truth behind his mistakes. Caught between the loyalty of the mate bond and her growing love for Luca, Sophia faces impossible choices that could determine her children's fate. “Mommy, Daddy, we want to be together!” > Alex and Alexia. “It’s not possible!” > Sophia. “Tell her it’s not!” > Nathan. Will she find it in her heart to forgive Nathan? Can she protect her family from those who threaten their safety? And with Victoria—the woman responsible for her banishment—still lurking, how far will Sophia go to secure a future for those she loves? With enemies closing in and her children caught in the crossfire, she must decide: Return to the pack with Nathan or forge a new future with Luca! Will love or loyalty prevail?

When they were married, billionaire tycoon Mr. Seven said, "That goth bitch is just after my money and my looks. If she dares to ever touch me, I'll chop her up into pieces."After the divorce, Mr. Seven went around telling others, "My wife has been bullied by her family all her life. She is the most gorgeous woman on earth. If you look at her funny, I'll gouge your eyes out!"Mr. Seven, do you even hear what you're saying?

"I'm gay." My eyes grow so big as I stop breathing, but two seconds later I'm bursting with laughter. "Okay funny," I finally tone down my laugh as I bring myself to look at him again. But he is still staring at me like he had been when he told me that joke. "Wait," uhh, "Really?" He nods, "Really." "You like... guys?" "I fuck guys." Oh wow, you really can't have it all can you. When he checks all the boxes, suddenly there's this big box he doesn't. The most important box, the top on the list. "You're gay or bi?" Because there's a big difference between those two. "I'm gay." "You never fuck a woman?" "I've never fucked a woman." "Then why the hell would you want me to be your sugar baby? To watch you fuck another man's butthole?" He smirks despite my little mockery. "Oh now it's funny?" "It is," he is still smirking, "But no. It's the opposite of what I wanna do." I bring my arms across my chest as I reply in my all-business tone, "Enlighten me." *** 22 year old Estelle is one of the best sugar babies the agency has ever had. She has the whole package, no dick ever gone soft seeing how perfect she is, both her body and personality. But can she sway Owen into the heterosexual group? After being in that homo-pool all this while?