Noted To Myself

"Stop… please stop… There are too many of you. You'll break me." On the bus back to the village, three rugged men from my hometown spread my legs apart and tore a hole right through the middle of my stockings. Steve Axwell, who lived opposite, said lecherously. "Kendall, I've watched you grow up. Let me check if you've started growing hair down there yet." Under the gaze of those big, strong men, I felt a mix of ache and itch. I couldn't stop myself from getting wet. "You're this soaked, and you've never been with a man? Don't worry—today, we're going to satisfy you real good."

My Alpha Series Book 2 (Standalone) Adrian: This girl is everything I did not want in a mate. She’s vulgar, acts and speaks like a savage, refuses to comply to me as her alpha, challenges me at every turn, and worst of all…she comes from the most evil rogue pack in the whole states. That fact alone should have made me kill her on the spot, if only my wolf and heart would agree with me. Lennox: Come on Adrian! Just because she’s a little… different, doesn’t mean you get to throw the gift that the goddess sent our way after all that time waiting for her! Besides, do you smell that? My goddess, her smell is so mouthwatering! Rhea: I want nothing to do with this arrogant prick! His royal highness thinks I’m not good enough for him, well I say he’s not good enough for me! Walking around with that stick up his ass, reminding me every second that I should consider myself lucky that I turned out to be his mate! I may be a rogue, but that doesn’t mean words don’t hurt me. After all, I wasn’t exactly like the rest of my rogue pack. Hazel: It wouldn’t hurt if you would just give the man a chance to see the real you Rhea! We never belonged with those animals! He’s just trying to show us a better way of living, the right way. Besides, his attitude aside, I know you’re dying for a taste of him despite everything, because I’m dying for one myself from his wolf. Come on! If you two don’t want a taste of each other, at least set us free to do our own tasting!

It was never part of my plan to get attached. I was just a freelance model, newly signed under a rising modeling agency in town. Everything was supposed to be simple; work, exposure, growth. Then came Dr. Aria Williams — dermatologist, surgeon, and the woman who was supposed to fix me. Chaos started the moment I met her. The way she talked, the way she looked at me felt like she was studying every inch of who I was. Every word I said, every silence I made, she read me like I was her favorite patient. It made me uncomfortably hot, and yet... I kept coming back. I told myself it was part of the therapy, the strange pull I felt toward her was part of it. But the way she looked at me; cold, curious, almost hungry, said otherwise. I hated her for it. I felt it every time her voice softened, every time her fingers lingered on my skin longer than they should. She called it treatment. I called it control. What started as therapy turned into something dark and deeper. I wanted to be beautiful, to be ready for the public, but what we craved became something private, something only between us. And the more sessions I had with her, the stronger the connection grew. Until one day, her eyes focused on someone else. And every time their eyes met, it burned through me. When she saw it, she offered something that challenged me. To be her slave and she'll be mine— alone. Soon, I found myself following her every order, fulfilling her desires without question. Along the way, I realized her obsession had become mine too. And before I could stop, the hate I once felt for her turned into something else.

The wolf inside me howls when the bond snaps into place. I’ve found my second-chance mate. Just a few days ago, the man I’ve loved my whole life gave me to our former enemy in exchange for his sister’s hand in marriage. After I risked my own life to save his, my first mate Alpha Raul traded me like a thing. My heart and mind are in chaos, and I feel like I’m losing my grip on reality. The only thing I’m absolutely certain of is that I want more of the tenderness this stranger is offering me, to lose myself in him. His eyes widen, nostrils flaring, and I know he can smell my interest. I’m straddling his waist, and our bodies are pressed together. “You are mine,” he says quietly, and runs his thumb across my lower lip. My breathing is erratic, and I can feel the heat coiling in me, pulsing through me in delectable waves. This is crazy. I don’t even know his name and still, everywhere our skin touches I can feel the want crackling between us like electricity. I want this so badly, but it’s not who I am. I can’t use my savior to avenge myself on Raul and put a plaster on my shattered heart. “I’m sorry, I can’t. This isn’t right,” I offer an apology before getting off of him. But his hand snaps out and grabs my wrist, yanking me back onto him. “Tut-tut little wolf, there’s no running away from me. You’re mated to Alpha King Aiden now and I fully intend to keep you.”

My sister, Bella, had a baby in a back-alley shithole. Then she disappeared. A midwife tracked me down using an address Bella left behind. She shoved the newborn at me like a sack of garbage. My parents fell to their knees. Crying. Begging me to take her bastard. Just like that, my future as a promising artist was gone. The neighbors, the priest, my landlord… they all called me a whore. A sinner who had disgraced God. They ran me out of the neighborhood . My life was over. Eighteen years later, Bella waltzed back into my life. A cheap thug with a fake Rolex dangled from her arm. She held my son, crocodile tears streaming down her face. She called me jealous. Accused me of stealing her flesh and blood. Of keeping a mother from her child. And my son? The one I bled myself dry for? The son I poured every last cent into, turning him into a brilliant painter? The son I starved for, so much that I ended up in a hospital bed? The moment he saw his "real" mother, he cast me aside without a second thought. "You pathetic, broke bitch!" he spat. "You stole everything from us! All the happiness that was supposed to be ours!" My parents threw me out like a dog. Bella's thug husband had his men corner me in the red-light district. They pinned me against a wall, their threats vile and clear: Never come back. I had no way out. I threw myself off the Brooklyn Bridge. Then, I opened my eyes. I was back. Eighteen years in the past. Then came the knock. Hell had found my door. I wasn’t going to be the fool who gave everything and got nothing. This time, I took control.

Within the circle, everyone knew I had been Leo’s most devoted, submissive admirer. For thirteen years, I chased him relentlessly, transforming myself from an uneducated, middle-school-dropout, illegitimate child of a wealthy family into an Ivy League economics master’s graduate. Only then did his mother finally acknowledge me, and I became Mrs. Smith. However, after the wedding, I no longer meddled in Leo’s company, cooked, or served him. While he stayed up late planning strategies for his first love, I traveled the world with friends. He would accompany her to Paris fashion shows, and I celebrated my cat’s birthday at home. I understood that a commercial marriage could never produce love. Everything I had poured my heart into was just my own foolish obsession. In my past life, I handled his company’s internal conflicts for him. Yet, he frowned, scolding, “You’re reaching too far.” I cooked soups for his stomach ailments, only to see him hand them off to his overworked first love, brushing it off, “She works harder than I do.” Even on the day I had a car accident, he lit fireworks across the city just to see her smile. I begged him, but he looked down at me from above. “Nicole, what we have is only a transaction.” Then, I opened my eyes and found myself back at our engagement banquet, watching him leave midway to comfort his heartbroken first love. This time, I did not chase after him. Instead, I picked up the microphone and said before all the guests. “Sorry, everyone. My engagement with Leo is canceled.”

Rima: Jacob Snow is a puzzle. I had initially mistaken him for a cold, uncaring, and arrogant CEO, but as we work together, I realize he's the exact opposite. He's warm, considerate, and humble, a far cry from the man I had painted in my mind. But acknowledging this doesn't mean I'm ready to let my guard down. My past is a dark, haunting shadow, and I refuse to let anyone get too close, afraid of the potential pain that could follow. It's been a while since I've felt this way about someone, and the familiarity of these feelings scares me. The last time it ended being the worst mistake of my life. I don't want to give in to these feelings, but I can't deny that Jacob is becoming more than just a boss to me. Jacob: Rima is enigmatic. She’s resilient, determined, and initially, she appears distant. But as we collaborate, I find myself drawn to her strength and determination. She’s unlike anyone I’ve ever met, and the spark between us is undeniable. She’s built a fortress around herself, a wall that's impossible to penetrate, but I’m determined to break it down. I sense she’s hiding something, and I can’t shake off the protective instinct that emerges whenever I see her. As we confront the danger together, I find myself struggling to resist the growing feelings I have for her. As danger looms, Rima and Jacob find themselves struggling to resist the growing attraction between them. Their pasts threaten to tear them apart, but they can’t deny the feelings that are blossoming between them. Will they be able to overcome their fears and trust each other? Or will their pasts continue to haunt them and prevent them from finding love?

EXTRACT.. Everything went dark as I felt myself falling, but I knew I was safe. Owen had me.   "I've got you, Luna. I've always got you." Tears streamed down my face as I gazed up at him. "You came for me," "I'll always come for you, Luna, I haven't forgotten my promise to you." "Thank you, Owen, you are my hope!” Darkness swallowed up my world and I was back to my husband Victor, my worst nightmare again. I thought I was from him so I could be with my first lover Owen but I thought wrong. "You brat!! No one ends things with Victor, no one gets out, and I give the final say!!” He pressed my neck with full force and I struggled to breathe. He finally let go and I started coughing, what have I gotten myself into?  "Take this!!” He took some documents and threw them at me.  I went through the document and it was a new marriage contract but the issue was different, it was an indefinite contract. “Sign it at once if you want to see your brother again!“ Am I doing this for real? I guess I have no other choice but to do this, I hope in my next life, I won't end up in this of a marriage. I am so sorry Owen, I have no other choice. I signed the contract and he grabbed my hair saying, "You belong to me for life!! You don't walk out until I am done with you.“ Luna's soul has been trapped in matrimony but do you think her lover, her hope can bring her out? Can love really save the day in the case of Luna? Let’s find out.

The darkness in his eyes, the dangerous smell of in his breath, and his deathly grip keeping me bound to him made my heart pound in my chest and my body quiver beneath him. Shamefully, it wasn't anything that I wasn't used to, because…the things I let him do to me? When he was frustrated, annoyed, and angry at the world, I was here to be his pound of flesh. In return, he masked the void of my loneliness because for months, that was the transaction of our relationship. He'd pin me to the wall, bend me over the counter, pull my hair, slap me, choke me, and I enjoyed every second of it because in that moment, it finally felt good to be powerless. Irony is a funny thing. I enjoyed being in pain because it made me forget how much I was hurting. *** "I warned you, doll." His voice strikes a string of chills down the base of my spine, a reminder that all of the time in the world could pass, and he's still not letting go. This is where the good girl in me dies. "You're mine now," he whispers. *** My name is Mercy—Mercy Carter. I went to college. Got myself a useless Bachelor of Science in Mathematics degree. His name is Marcel—Marcello Saldívar. However, at the time, I didn't know that he, the heir to the Saldívar Mafia empire, was the man that I had blindly offered myself to. As smart as I am, I was stupid all the times when it actually mattered. After all, he did warn me he was dangerous. I just didn't think he could be much worse than my thug brother. I was vulnerable—naive. I belong to him. My name is Mercy, and I am the Mafia's Mercy.

I had always been a people pleaser. Yet somehow, I ended up transmigrating into the role of the vicious wife of a general. After three years away at war, Scott Holden returned and brought his so-called true love back with him. I handed over the main bedroom without hesitation, cooked for her myself, stayed up all night stitching a pair of matching pillows, and even had all the staff lined up to welcome her properly. But instead of being pleased, Jennifer Cross burst into tears. "This is all my fault. I have no name, no status, yet I'm staying here at Holden Residence, letting Lillian humiliate me like this. If that's the case, I'll just leave!" It hit me all at once. So that was what she wanted. A proper title. So I drafted a divorce letter for Scott myself, brought it to him, and said with an ingratiating smile, "After you divorce me, could you maybe keep me on the side as a mistress? My parents are gone. I don't have anywhere else to go." Scott flew into a rage. "I see right through your little tricks. Jennifer is just staying here temporarily. Are you really that petty?" From that day on, he never set foot in my room again. Then one day, enemy forces attacked. Jennifer and I were both captured and strung up on the city wall, forcing Scott to choose between us. Before he could even decide, I shouted eagerly, "I'll die, I'll die! I'm totally willing! I love that rush you get from falling from high up, that adrenaline spike!" After all, once I died, I could finally go home. But for the first time, Scott's eyes turned red with panic.