Quirky Humour Novels & Stories

But as the syllable left his throat, his torso began to heave, and a low, mocking rumble of masculine laughter broke from his chest. “What element of this crisis introduces humor to your spirit?” she asked, her aura flaring with deep irritation.

Quinn snickers and puts it in the cart. “What’s so funny?” “Come on,” she says, holding up the carrot. “What?” She hikes up an eyebrow. “Do you have to be a serious fuddy-duddy all the time now that you’re a doctor?” “Fuddy-duddy?” “Yeah, a fuddy-duddy.” “I’ve never heard an adult say that.” She rolls her eyes. “Well, you are one. You can’t say you didn’t think the same thing I did when you saw that deformed carrot.”

I look down at my cappuccino, unable to take a drink. He grins with another low rumbling chuckle. “You’re a psychology student, right?” He asks and I nod as a reply. The guy seems to know everything about me. “Well isn’t it true if you were in effect suffering from some kind of schizophrenic break from reality then shouldn’t this all be something normal for you? A schizophrenic can’t distinguish hallucinations from reality but you seem able to recognize the abnormality of what's happening to you. So essentially that you think you’re insane proves that you are indeed not insane.”

My laughter faded into the air. “No,” the sound of his laughter also faded. “Then why are you sounding like a quack?” “Do I?” Nodding my head, “Fucking yah. It’s only a quack who will speak about love to a man like me.” “Then I think I'm one.” Snapping my fingers, “Shoot!!…. I knew it. You are indeed one.” Waving my hand slightly in the air, my face adjusted to neutral. “Enough of the jokes. I came here to get answers, and that’s what I'm fucking waiting for.”

“That was... something.” He didn’t even flinch. “Tough crowd,” he muttered under his breath. Tough crowd? Was this a boardroom or open mic night? --- Then came the coffee break. I’d barely made it to the break room when he cornered me with another one of his “brilliant” jokes. “What do you call a sad cup of coffee?” he asked, his voice dripping with enthusiasm. Against my better judgment, I played along. “What?” “A depresso.”

She frowned and then took another drink of her beer. “I bet that you spent your days making voodoo dolls of the Lycan Kings and Queens and stick pins in them!” This came from Eric who also worked in the kitchen. He had a darkness to him and had a rather interesting taste in dark humour. He was funny most of the time but somehow managed to take some of his jokes a little too far.

His features twisted out of confusion. “How? I mean what's better than having someone relieve your stress.” “If someone can make me happy, it can have an opposite effect too. it's like giving someone an authority to ruin you.” maybe it was very extreme idea. But, being cautious never disgusts you, right? “C’mon, it's not that bad.” He smiled goofily. “Why are you laughing? Don't you have the same concerns about Sara. Your girl.” His features chenged and became a bit rigid. I knew, I caught him off guard. Quinn was too crazy to figure out things like that.

That's, absurdity to the highest degree! Irresistible my rotten shit! "It's just amusing how distinct you seem right now. Did you win a jackpot or something?" I give him that. I just feel like I need to play within the margins of his imbecility to soothe his ego. But damn! His hoax has imprinted a perpetual smirk on my face that I am unable to cloak. I can't brush it off even by taking my gazes off him. I guess this is the most humorous thing I have ever heard of.

Life’s so unfair, man. “What does a spoon matter when we’re literally stuck in the middle of the woods with invisible monsters, shady, bad men and whatever else creeps around here? Can you please, for once, use your brain and kick some sense in the gear?” He whisper-hisses, so red in the face, he reminds me of a tomato. “You could join a casting for vegetable commercials looking like this,” I remark and laugh at the brilliant joke my brain just reacted. Shit, am I not the funniest guy out there? Look at me - sense of humor, looks, body and an impressive spoon collection, I have it all, damn it. No wonder my little vixen couldn’t deny me.

I'm probably sleeping in my cozy bed the moment I got home like usual. "I'm glad that you are not corrupted with her weirdness." He blurted out, leaning his back on his chair while still sipping his yogurt. “Weird is better than arrogant like you. You really think I cannot hear you mocking behind me, huh?” Zaina requited and glared at Quir but this guy next to doesn't even give a fuck to Zaina's witty comeback.