Novel & Cerita Stop Lying To Yourself Book

“So, what do I do next?” “You stop treating everything and everyone like they are dangerous explosives waiting to detonate and ruin your life. You start living again. You give life a chance. You follow your heart, make stupid, crazy decisions like defending yourself against those who wrong you, and do not feel guilty for even a second. You become selfish with your heart. For the first time in your life.” A lone tear drizzled down my cheek. I let out a nervous laugh before wiping it away fast. “Thanks, Dr. Phil.”

“I wrote it because I thought I was the only one who felt like she was disappearing. But I wasn’t. And neither are you.” She read an excerpt from the chapter titled The First Lie I Believed—a story about being told that ambition was selfish, that wanting more was dangerous. Her voice trembled at first, then steadied. The room was silent. Then someone clapped. Then another. And then the whole room rose to its feet.

I was tensed as he spoke. "But I also saw a woman who was trying. Who showed up early, stayed late, and never complained. Also someone who helped everyone around her." He paused. "That's not someone who steals." I turned to face him. My eyes burned. "I worked so hard to build this life. So hard to leave my past behind. And now.." I stopped. My voice cracked. Mr. Bernard turned to look at me as he spoke. "Jessica, I'm going to fight this. I don't know how yet. I don't know if I'll win. But I promise you. I'm not giving up."

"It means you can stop trying to be perfect. Stop trying to disappear. Stop folding yourself smaller so you fit into spaces that were never going to have room for you anyway. You are here now. With me. You do not have to perform anymore." The words hit me harder than they should. I open my mouth to argue. To tell him I am not performing. But the denial dies in my throat because he is right. I have been performing since I walked through the door. Polite. Careful. Saying the right things and making myself as small as possible so he does not regret bringing me here. "I do not know how to stop," I say quietly. "Then practice here. With me. Where it is safe to get it wrong."

But I don’t miss the cost I used to pay for it. That cost was self-erosion. And once you’ve stopped eroding, you can’t unknow the difference. He says it best one night, casually, like an observation rather than reassurance (his POV). “You’re living as if you trust yourself to adapt.” I pause. “That might be the first real guarantee I’ve ever had,” I say. He smiles. “That’s usually enough.” The chapter closes not with triumph, but with something sturdier. A truth that doesn’t inspire—it anchors.

That is not just important, that is a scandal waiting to happen. And the crazy thing is, I told him everything. About Dave. About my past. About my childhood. About things I don’t even like remembering. I opened up because I thought we were building something honest. And now this. I leaned against the counter, holding my mug, and just… stood there. Thinking. Spiraling. Until I caught myself. Because I know this pattern. I know when I am going too deep into my own head. So I stopped. Ground yourself, Lydia.

I unbelievably stated. And I do not want to return the book. That book is giving me answers. All of my questions before were answered by that book. I need to hide it, I need to keep it safe. I don't know what's urging me to do that, but I want to keep that book and hide it. I'm so sick of believing their lies. I hate dancing to the rhythm of uncertainty- I can't dance on that kind of rhythm in life. I want to be certain with my move and most importantly, I want to protect all of them. I do not want to be anybody's weakness.

He paused. "Never meant to leave means," I whispered. "Perhaps, they were meant to help you, change you into the person you have been waiting to become." he snapped out. "I am tired, tired of drowning in the dark. I want to know the truth, why does everyone hide things from me, I don't know what I need to do?" I blurted out all in once. "Then stop. Stop running after things you don't know. Let those things chase you themselves. Give them time. Trust them. Trust yourself." he spoke with utmost pain in his voice.

The person I have always wanted and… I will not jump into conclusions seeing as I hardly know him but it is something I am feeling and I guess I am telling you dumb book about it because I cannot talk to anyone else. My pen stopped moving as the emotions drained out of me. There was nothing to talk about again and I realized my thoughts were much calmer than they had been before I began writing into the book. Maybe the dumb therapist was right and this was a means to my recovery. I closed the book and put it underneath my pillow before closing my eyes and falling into some dream.

“S-Stop lying!” “You're the only one who's lying to yourself, Schuyler.” He slowly stood up to level me. “And there's nothing to take back, those were all truth you have seen coming, but refuse to welcome!” “S-Stop it… Stop!” I shook my head at him and turned my back to leave the place.