Tagalog Dad Jokes

On the day we're supposed to register our marriage, my girlfriend Jenny Sutton has me removed from the city hall. She walks in with her childhood sweetheart, Ronald Walsh. She looks at me without a flicker of guilt and says, "Ronald's kid needs his legal status sorted out. Once we divorce, I'll marry you." Everyone assumes I'll wait. I'm the devoted fool who's already waited seven years, so one more month seems trivial. That night, I go along with my family's plan and leave the country for a marriage of convenience. I cut myself cleanly out of Jenny's life. Three years later, I return to the country with my wife, Ellie Olsen, who's a CEO, to pay respects at her family's graves. A last-minute issue pulls her away, and she asks the local branch to send someone to pick me up. I didn't expect Jenny, not after three years. "You have dragged this out long enough. Come back. Ronald's kid will be starting kindergarten soon. You can handle the school runs."

Diego Salvaje is a hitman and his target is the sole heir of Morales clan that has extensive connections when it comes to large businesses either inside or outside the country. Dahil sa palpak na assassination, nag-isip nang panibagong paraan si Diego para mailigpit si Drian Morales. Ngunit paano kung ang taong target mo ay ang siyang taong magpapanginig sa kalamnan at mga tuhod mo? Handa niya pa kayang ituloy ang misyon? O hahayaan ang puso na magpalunod sa nakababaliw na pag-ibig?

A broken relationship leaves her homeless just days before Christmas, forcing her to take a temporary job on a luxury holiday yacht. She expects nothing more than survival—until fate places her in the path of a powerful Alpha who should have been forbidden. What begins as a reckless mistake turns into a bond neither of them can escape. But jealousy festers close to home, and a vengeful enemy is determined to destroy her at any cost. Time passes, love blooms, and a pregnancy meant to unite a pack instead tears it apart. Cast out with nothing but her child, she is forced to rebuild her life from ashes, while the man who once rejected her uncovers a betrayal so deep it shatters his world. This is a dark holiday romance about obsession, revenge, shattered trust—and the price of believing a lie.

When the college admission notice arrived, I suddenly developed a high fever and was bedridden. My sister encountered a kidnapping on her way to help me collect the notice, and her life was uncertain. My parents hated me deeply. After tearing up my admission notice, they forced me to give up my studies and work in a factory. Later, I experienced a kidnapping as well. After narrowly escaping, I hid in an abandoned factory and sent them a message for help. My dad called me and shouted at me without restraint, “Lena, are you even human? How could you play such a joke on us on Jessica's memorial day!” “Do you have any idea how much your mom and I wished it had been you who died back then?” In my last moments before death, their insults echoed in my ears. I was tortured and killed, turned into a monster, and my body was thrown into a stinking ditch for three full days. Even my father, the most experienced forensic expert, couldn’t recognize me. When my sister returned home with the guy she eloped with years ago, my dad had just restored my appearance through technology. They knelt before my decaying corpse and cried until they fainted.

“Are you still a virgin?” Iyan ang unang tanong na lumabas sa bibig niya nang unang beses kaming magtagpo. Caleb Valderama. Bastos, magaspang ang ugali’t bibig, at higit sa lahat, nasobrahan sa pagkababaero. Siya ang zilyonaryo na nakatakdang pakasalan ng kambal ko, at siya rin ang lalaking magiging mitsa ng kalbaryo ko. Sabi nila, ‘Opposites do attract.’ Pero bakit sa amin, hindi naging applicable iyon? Ako si Lana Monteclaro, kilala bilang ‘shadow twin’ ni Liana Monteclaro. Simple lang ang gusto ko sa buhay, ang makapag-aral ng kolehiyo sa Japan para makamit ko ang pagiging Manga artist. Ngunit para sa pangarap kong iyon, kinailangan kong pumayag sa hininging pabor ng kakambal ko: I pretended as my twin sister to be Caleb’s fiancé for two months.

Vanessa, an omega in the Blood Moon Pack, suffered a devastating blow when the Alpha's son spurned her in favor of another. Seeking solace elsewhere, she eventually returns to her pack, only to be greeted by tragedy: the untimely passing of the beloved Luna, the woman who raised her. In the midst of grief and upheaval, Vanessa’s world is further rocked when she discovers she's been chosen as the Alpha's second chance mate. Alpha Alexander, grappling with unexpected emotions and the significant age gap between them, struggles to come to terms with this twist of fate—especially considering Vanessa was once rejected by his own son. As tensions rise and emotions run high, Alpha Alexander’s conflicted feelings lead him to make a rash decision: to punish Vanessa for a drunken mistake made in the heat of the moment. But as the lines blur between duty, desire, and resentment, both Vanessa and Alpha Alexander find themselves on a collision course with destiny.

Upon my returning from the special ops mission I took on three years ago, I open the door to see my fiancee, Erica Lewis, pregnant and holding a child. "This is your son," she declares as she passes the kid to me. I freeze in shock. My parents chuckle and explain, "You were gone for so long. Erica had to carry on the family name without you, so your older brother decided to help you with it. Isn't that great?" Just like that, I'm forced to be the officiant at the wedding ceremony I spent the last three years eagerly anticipating. I'm expected to stand beside Erica and my brother, Alex Sherman, to watch them exchange wedding rings and to see them kiss each other passionately. They have lied to all our friends and family, claiming that I couldn't have children. They humiliate me in public. They've also spent all of my savings and moved into the villa I bought using the monetary reward I got from the army after completing a deadly mission. Erica and Alex even lie on the bed I'd picked out myself and take intimate photos of themselves to send to me. "Don't be so sensitive. We're just helping you carry on the family name. Our kids are going to call you dad anyway." I give up. "Don't bother. It's over between us, Erica." After that, I call the army on the phone.

Nanlumo siya nang makita nabunot ang ibang ugat nito. Kakaunti na lang ugat ang nag - uugnay sa puno at sa lupa. Napaupo siya swing doon. Ilang taon. Ilang taon niyang minahal si Enzo. Si Enzo lang, wala nang iba. Nang maging maayos na ang lahat sa kanila, saka sila magkakaroon ng matinding problema. Parang itong puno lang. Noong panahong bata pa ito ay hindi man lang nagupo ng bagyo. Ngayong kung ilang panahon nang nakatanim, Bagyong Andoy lang pala ang magpapasuko dito. Sa kaso nila ni Enzo, isang Natalie na kailan lang nito nakilala ang magpapabago sa lahat. For love encompasses a strong, positive emotional and mental states.. a woman in distress may feel at lost when the love of her life cheated on her. Athena and Enzo were childhood friends who later on became sweethearts. But something came along the way that broke her heart. She felt cheated and cannot do something about it. Here come Martin to the rescue. Will she fall for him or will she stay in love with Enzo?

When Avery Quinn gets fed up with her loveless marriage and the humiliation she was constantly fed with, she leaves with the divorce papers, vowing to herself not to get mixed up with any arrogant billionaire again. But she might have spoken too soon, because she finds herself drawn to another emotionally distant, and cold billionaire - and his 7 year old daughter.

Tagalog.Fantasy.Romance.Action.Truelove Amaliah, a witch princess who went to a faraway Kingdom for a traditional mission. To be an independent one, she works as a maid to earn her own money. Without knowing, she is unfolding her real mission, finding pure love, a cure to a curse. But will her prince accept her fully, if he found out who she really is? Read me, please; Ang kwentong ito ay nakasulat sa third and first point of view. Female Lead will only use the first point of view to avoid confusion. Thank you and enjoy reading.