Terrible Puns Novels & Stories

Maybe he'd disguised it as a rash? "She's a bit busy at the moment, Father!" The demon rolled his hips down, mashing my cheek into the rough-hew of the centuries-old confessional chair, hairy swollen balls striking me in the chin. "Just a little…tongued tied!" Ugh, the puns! Why did they always think they were funny? They had as much wit as a fucking frat boy ten sheets to the wind on a Thirsty Thursday! Imbeciles! Bingo! There we are, right on the taint!

But the society where she grew up, arrange marriages were common and the name itself freaked her out, that how can a woman live with a man whom she barely knows. She only witnessed failed marriages in her family and even her own parents were the example of a fail couple in which only her mother was trying to pull up the strings together and making efforts. Her father was a selfish man who didn't loved her mother, only liked to spent money for comfort but never let his wife lay a finger on his money.

She deadass did save my life but something in the back of my mind kept telling me that was not the reason I was agitated to meet her. "Then tell me what the fuck the reason is, you stupid brain." I yelled into my pillow, muffling the sound to the point where it almost sounded non-existent. I'm not one to play mind games, I just wanted to know the reason. Did you get the pun there? I'm so fucking funny. I know you're shaking your head thinking of what a stupid pun that was. But you know it was fucking lit. Maybe I should go into Comedy instead, I'm too funny for Urban/Realistic/Drama. Imagine my next stop being called Life of Eve: Comedy and Puns. What do you think?

Some students were disappointed, while others were excited and even wished the class would end without a lesson. Hayle excitedly came to the front of the class. "Attention, please!" Everyone was suddenly silent and focused on Hayle. "So, I have something unique that I want to show you." Hayle took out a cassette tape, "I have this!" The students laughed and looked strangely at Hayle, except for one person. Tony. The nerdy student who rarely spoke. He looked at the cassette in Hayle's hand with a shocking face. "This cassette has a song called "Terrifying" which was released in 1982. Well, it sounds weird. Let's play it!"

I don't know what is funnier, the fact that I had to physically wheel Finn out of the hospital in a wheelchair, or the fact that he fell over when he stood up. I am also questioning whether I am a terrible person for laughing before helping him. "Stupid dumb leg, who needs it anyway?" Finn growls under his breath as I help him up the porch steps. "They're pretty important," I reply with an eye roll, bearing more of his weight than I am probably capable of.

com SUBJECT: I did something stupid (figures) _____________________________________________________________ I currently have the biggest hangover in the existence of hangovers and I only have beer pong to blame for this. I don’t understand why you had left for the weekend but I am so mad at you guys for abandoning me. The Kappa’s threw such a good party, you guys don’t understand. And I won beer pong – I, uncoordinated, idiotic, Hayley Anderson had beaten someone in beer pong. It was absolutely magical and had resulted in me getting so wasted I did the most stupid thing in the world.