Twilight Quotes Funny

So there I was, stuck in this dark Victorian mansion for a whole freaking century, thinking I'd never get out. Then, out of nowhere, these two gorgeous girls swoop in and rescue me! I couldn't believe it, and we instantly hit it off. They showed me a whole new world I'd only ever imagined, and I was all about living a normal human life.   But just when I thought things were looking up, this vampire named Vivaldi pops up out of thin air, grinning like a possessed Jack-o'-lantern. I mean, a name like Vivaldi is bound to give you the creeps, right? He claimed I had some ancient first blood running through my veins and demanded that I sign some crazy blood contract with him—the kind of deal that comes with some seriously freaky consequences.   Vivaldi was trying to sell me the idea that this blood contract was his only lifeline, the only way to save his skin from something worse than death. But I wasn't some clueless newborn vamp; I knew better than to just dive into something as serious as a blood contract. Those things come with some heavy consequences, and I wasn't about to sign up for that without a second thought.   The problem was, if I didn't go along with his messed-up plan, he promised to make my friends' lives a living hell—the very people I'd started to care about. I was trapped between a rock and a hard place. If I decided to team up with Vivaldi, I'd be keeping him around, which is far from ideal. But if I refused, my friends and the whole town of Shadowvale would be in serious danger.    It felt like I was caught in this impossible situation, like I was trying to choose between two rotten apples.

Katie finds herself about to go to jail for something she didn't do. When gorgeous Samantha saves her and makes her an incredible offer. Katie has no idea of the dangerous game they are playing

I had it all planned out—my perfect life with a fiancé I was set to marry in a couple of months and a good job that paid my bills. But it all came crashing down when I caught my fiance cheating on me. And as if fate wanted to add insult to my injury, I lost my job the next day. Guess who I also ran into? Zachary Montgomery, my evil ex-boss. Despite our turbulent history, our connection was instant. Unexpectedly, he offered me a job, reigniting the sparks between us. I managed to maintain professionalism until he asked me to marry him so he could secure a contract. Now, I'm torn between the wild flames of passion that still exist and the heartbreak that still lingers from my rough past. Will I surrender to the allure of Zachary and the possibility of a new beginning? Or will I let my heartbreak dictate my future?

OWEN GARCIA is the twin brother of RUSSELL ROSSELL (heir of the billionaire Theodore Rossell), kidnapped by NURSE GEMMA GARCIA. SHELLEY SILVER is a woman who dreams to be a novelist but received rejections one after another. Till she met and became friends with Russell Rossell who pretended to be an ordinary employee from the company of Theodore Rossel. He has a knack for writing and suggested that be the ghostwriter of Shelley and she readily agreed. Russel Rossell was hospitalized due to a car accident. That was the time Owen entered the life of Shelley, and pretended to be Russel Rossell. Like Russel Rossell, Owen also has a knack for writing novels, thus, Shelley wasn't able to know the difference between the twins. Gemma Garcia learned about Russell accident, and planned to use "her son" to get inside the Rossell Clan. Since he loved "his mother" Owen agreed to Gemma's plan. But they say, blood is thicker than water, hence, Owen felt pity for his twin brother when he met Joanne (acting as Russel Rossell, boyfriend of Joanne) and found out that Joanne is in relation with Brendon, the stepson of Theodore, who also masterminded the car accident of Russel. Thus, Russell Owen wrote a novel that divulged the crime of Brendon and requested Shelley to send copies to Theodore Rossell. Shocked, as he reads the book, Theodore ordered an investigation of his son's accident. And Brendon was sent to prison. The lives of Russel, Owen, Gemma, Shelley, and Theodore get tangled up till Theodore finds out that Owen is the twin brother of his son (by DNA). Now Shelley's Dilemma is who does she really love? Is it Russel Rosell who she loved the very first time she saw him or Owen, the mistaken identity of Russell Rossell?

Zane is a werewolf and his planet was destroyed by vampires. His mother sent him to Earth, the planet of humans, just before their planet was destroyed. Zane was a young werewolf and he didn't know how to survive on his own, in a planet of humans, but then, he found an orphanage and his life changes

Isang babaeng kinatatakokotan ng kahit sinong tao na makabangga niya dahil sa angking galing nito sa pakikipagtunggali--- Nathalie Collins. Isang mahusay na NBI Agent, dahil lahat ng misyong ibinibigay sa kaniyan ay walang kahirap-hirap niyang nalutas. Ngunit sa kaniyang puso ay nakapaloob ang lungkot at paghihiganti upang mabigyan ng katarungan ang mga magulang na basta na lang pinatay ng taong hindi niya kilala. Sa patuloy niyang paghahanap sa mga kriminal na pumaslang sa pamilya niya, ay unti-unti namang lumalambot ang puso niya sa babaero niyang boss na si Frank Smith. Para sa kanya ay kailangan niyang sumipilin ang kaniyang puso lalo na at alam ni Natalie na sa bandang huli ay siya pa rin ang uuwing luhaan. Ngunit hanggang kailan niya kayang paglabanan ang pag-ibig na nadarama para kay Frank? At may pag-asa pa kayang makamit ng mga magulang ni Natalie ang hustisyang nararapat para sa pamilya?

Rhoda Schurz is known for being a born-again Christian missionary and she falls in love with Rudolf Wagner, who is a resigned U.S Army officer. They encounter a tragic accident and that gives him pain. Their marriage presents enumerable conflicts. Rhoda overcomes all in the eyes of faith in Jesus Christ. Rudolf is convinced that JESUS healed him and he also follows Christ's teaching with Rhoda, whom he loves.

"Why do you hate me so much, Maan" she asked hiccupping, hitting his chest. "I never said that" he said holding her hands. ____________________________________ "So, my Ita, how does it feels to be Mrs. Dutta," he asked holding her from behind while making eye contact in the mirror. "Best feeling in this world, Mr. Dutta" she replied kissing his cheek. ____________________________________ "I BLOODY ASKED YOU TO DO ONE THING BUT YOU CAN'T EVEN DO THAT!" he shouted slamming the wooden desk with his fists. "I am sorry, sir" she replied with tears welling up in her eyes. ____________________________________ "I will kill that man if I see him near you again" he said dangerously running his index finger from her forehead to neck. "W...why" she asked stammering. "Because you are mine"...

Out of her mundane life Ava sparked the interest of one of the celestial. Something she read from books and heard from stories but she chose to reject their existence. Will her personal vendetta cost her life or lead her to something better? A mere human who thought she was just caught in the crossfire among the gods. When in fact she was the root of it. 'Words are powerful because you wouldn't know who is listening, huh?' That's what she said on their first meeting. Still forcing herself not to believe even if the proof is right in front of her. His intent was to prove his innocence to her. Yet he entangled himself for a bigger mess, is it really? The mere spectator from before is now part of a dangerous game. His choices will determine not only his fate but of the two worlds and the entire humanity. The more he wanted to break free the more he gets drawn to her. An unexplained phenomenon he felt for the first time since he was created. 'You wouldn't know how it feels unless you go through the same ordeal.' He remembered what his friend told him and realized that he was eating his own words. He was willing to abandon everything just to be with her. Even if it meant being selfish for the first time. He is changing for the worse but can't let go of her now. Not when she already meant everything to him. When the hope of redemption seems impossible, a revelation is unleashed. More questions emerge instead of answers they needed. Will it become the cure or just another poison? What are they willing to sacrifice for their freedom and salvation? Do they even have that choice? Or would they cease to exist leaving no traces behind?

Love does not appear with any warning signs. You fall into it as if pushed from a high diving board. No time to think about what’s happening. It’s inevitable. An event you can’t control. A crazy, heart-stopping, roller-coaster ride that just has to take its course. Hazel was rejected by someone she loved and was told that he would be engaged to her deadly foe. In great despair, she went to a bar and met this handsome guy (Zac). They drank a lot and played games. Under the influence of alcohol, they got married. However when they came back to her senses, they decide to make things right, but it's hard to get a divorce now because she wants to use the dramatic yet genuine marriage to keep her proud in front of her deadly foe. Zac on the other hand was the future heir to one of the richest and prosperous families. Although he was endowed with an otherworldly handsomeness, he was known to be as cold as ice and had a natural dislike for women although they always craved after him like bees to a honey pot. But for some unknown reason, he finds something unique about Hazel which he can’t explain. Perhaps, it were her eyes which were limpid and pure like autumn water and sparkled like azure pools in the morning sunlight… Would it be possible that they fall in love with each other in the future? Take part in this amazing piece, and experience a story filled with various mysteries and incredible twists as she uncovers the mysteries surrounding Zac who decides to hide his identity and tremendous background in order to win her heart genuinely.