Wedding Quotes Funny

Hindi inakala ni Naya Cervantes na mauuwi sa kama ang bachelorette party niya ng gabing ‘yon, kasama ang isang lalaking hindi niya kilala. Pero ang mas nakakagulat sa lahat, paggising niya kinaumagahan ay may suot na siyang wedding ring, at kasal na raw siya rito. Determinado siyang kalimutan ang nangyari sa kanila ng estrangherong lalaki. After all, ikakasal na siya kay Diego Del Valle, ang lalaking mahal niya. Pero sa araw ng kasal nila ay isang hindi inaasahang twist ang sumalubong sa kanya. Ang lalaking nakasama at nakasiping niya ay walang iba kundi si Dante Del Valle, ang kakambal ni Diego. Ngayon ay hawak ni Dante ang sikreto nila. Para hindi ito mabunyag ay may hinihingi itong kapalit mula kay Naya—She must be available to him whenever he wants her.

Sa gabi ng kanilang wedding anniversarry ay iba ang katabi ng asawa ni Czarina na si Jasper sa kanilang kama, pinagmalupitan siya ng byenan at higit sa lahat ay diniborsyo ng asawa. Ilang taon niya ring tiniis ang pagiging cold at halos walang pakialam na pagtrato sa kaniya ni Jasper, sa kaniya'y kaya niya pang magtiis kahit gaano katagal basta't kasama lang ang asawa. Mahal niya ito at handang ibigay ang lahat. Ngunit ng ito na ang magtulak sa kaniya papalayo ay wala na siyang nagawa, tinanggap niya 'yon ngunit hindi ang tungkol sa pagkawala ng bata sa kaniyang sinapupunan. Kung hindi siya in-stress ng asawa't pisikal na sinaktan ay baka hindi siya nakunan. Subalit ang nangyaring 'yon ang siyang nagpamulat sa kaniyang mga mata. Pinirmahan niya ang papel ng diborsyo't nilisan ang tahanan. Ngunit ang hindi niya alam ay may isang mayaman, gwapo at matipunong lalaki ang nag-aabang sa kaniyang paglaya. Inalok siya ng kasal ng bilyonaryong si Alexander James Ford. Tinanggap niya 'yon at piniling magbagong buhay, subalit mukhang hindi papayag ang tadhana na siya ay maging masaya agad. Dahil muli ay nagbabalik ang kaniyang dating asawa't handang gawin ang lahat upang makuha siyang muli. "Binabawi ko ang akin, Mr. Ford," umiigting ang pangang turan ni Jasper sa harapan ni Alexander. "Well, goodluck Mr. Clarkson. 'Cause I don't share," siyang naging sagot ni Alexander sa lalaking hinarang siya sa kaniyang dinaraanan.

Arielle Sarmiento was supposed to marry her long-time boyfriend, Lucas De Leon, but he didn’t show up on their wedding day. And the most painful part? She caught him in bed with her best friend, Bianca Yllana. Walang ibang nagawa si Arielle kundi magpakalasing sa bar. Doon niya nakilala ang isang lalaking estranghero. Silas Ferrell. Siya mismo ang nagyaya ng one-night stand dahil gusto niyang makaganti at gusto niyang makalimot. Silas didn’t hold back. They shared a night of heat, desire, and reckless abandon. That night, she gave him everything... pati ang pagkabirhen niya. Kinabukasan ay umalis siya sa condo ni Silas nang walang paalam. Pero pagpasok niya sa bago niyang trabaho, isang gulat ang bumungad sa kanya. Ang lalaking naka-one-night stand niya ay ang boss niya—si Silas Ferrell. Sa parehong araw, dumaing ang mundo niya. Ang ama niya ay na-diagnose ng congestive heart failure, at kailangan ng emergency surgery. Malaking halaga ang kailangang ilaan. Agad. Doon siya inalok ni Silas ng sampung milyong piso, kapalit ng kasal. Tinanggap niya ang alok dahil kailangan niya ng pera. Pumirma siya sa kontrata nang hindi binabasa. Ikinasal sila sa huwes. Pero nang mabasa niya ang kontrata sa bandang huli, natigilan siya. Walong buwang pagsasama bilang mag-asawa. May walong buwan din siyang obligasyon sa kama. Pero paano kung may mabuo sa pagitan nila? Paano kung mabuntis siya? Tatanggapin ba ni Silas ang bata, kung simula’t simula pa lang ay katawan lang niya ang habol nito, at malinaw sa kontrata na hindi siya puwedeng mabuntis?

Ysabelle Andra Guerrero never thought her love life would become a business transaction. As the only daughter and heiress of an airline company, she lived independently— an adrenaline junkie, a traveler, and someone who swore never to open her heart yet but her world turns upside down when her family uses her for a deal: a marriage contract to secure a business partnership. Worst? She must marry Aldrich Evan Lorenzo— the man who left her without any explanation. Aldrich, heir to a well-known travel company, faces his own crisis. With his family’s business on the brink of collapse, he agrees to the arranged marriage, unaware that the bride-to-be is the woman he secretly loved and lost. Bound by a contract with clear terms: 1. End the marriage once the Lorenzo company recovers. 2. Act as a powerful couple in public. 3. No strings attached. Neither of them wants to say “I do,” but both have too much to lose. On their wedding day, chaos strikes when Sarina Fructuoso—a famous dermatologist, crashes the ceremony, claiming she’s pregnant with Aldrich’s child. The revelation stuns everyone, especially Ysabelle but gives Aldrich the benefit of the doubt, suspecting a setup. As they navigate a web of lies, public scrutiny, and hidden feelings, their scripted affection begins to feel real. Behind the staged smiles and cold arrangements, they find themselves drawn back to each other. What started as a contract becomes a fight for something deeper—a second chance at love neither of them expected.

Makakamit na sana ni Elena Corsini ang perpektong buhay na hinahangad niya. A lavish wedding, a powerful family, and the man she was destined to marry. Pero lahat iyon ang gumuho sa isang gabi lang nang agawin ng stepsister niya ang mapapangasawa niya, patayin ang kanyang ina, at sirain nito ang mukha niya. Determined to reclaim her life and seek vengeance, Elena trains under a dangerous crime boss with one mission: take down the Bellucci family, starting with the ruthless Mafia Don, Giovanni Bellucci. At para magtagumpay ay kailangan niya itong akitin, manipulahin, at wasakin lahat ng meron ang lalaking ito. But revenge is never simple. As Elena draws closer to Giovanni, she discovers a dangerous new emotion... desire. Unti-unti na siyang nahuhulog sa lalaking iyon.

Although the Supreme returns in order to pass his days peacefully, he was belittled by everyone. On his wedding day, with a wave of his arm, he summoned the Nine Great Gods of War to him, who addressed him as their master…

Rosalie Jacobs had been married to Byron Lawrence for three years before finally getting a divorce. The entirety of Coast City frowned upon her as the outcast wife of a rich family.Six years later, Rosalie returned to the country with a pair of twins and became a world renowned miracle doctor.Countless people flocked to marry her.Suitor No. 1 said, "Miss Jacobs, are your children missing a father? What do you think of me? If you agree, I will treat them like my own."Suitor No. 2, "Miracle doctor Jacobs, I was blown away by your beauty and talent when I first met you. I would like the chance to love you to the best of my ability for the rest of my life. President Lawrence is blind to turn his back on you. I would never leave you!"Just then, a little girl appeared. She hugged Rosalie's leg and said, "Mommy, daddy has been kneeling on the washboard for three days and three nights now. He asked if you’d calmed down yet. If you have, he wants to go to the Civil Affairs Bureau to get remarried."

Despite being single, Molly May had become pregnant without her knowing how six years ago. As a result, she fell into disrepute and got abandoned by her family.Six years later, she returned with her triplets: Alex, Ben, and Claudia. The triplets with high IQ found that Sean Anderson was their biological father. Hence, they went to meet him without telling their mother.However, the CEO refused to recognize his offspring. “I have lived chastely and never had physical contact with a woman.”“DNA doesn’t lie, and that’s a fact,” said Alex, the eldest of the bunch.“People say men will forget what they've done after pulling on pants. It seems to be true,” said Ben, the middle child.“You should be happy and grateful to have three adorable kids and a beautiful wife,” said Claudia, the youngest of the bunch.While Sean played the role of a father and his relationship with the triplets grew rapidly, he was estranged from his wife.So the triplets taught him tips and tricks to pursue women: making bold moves, stealing kisses, proposing, etc.Nevertheless, Molly was distraught by his moves. “Such flirting skills befit an experienced male escort.”When Sean's identity was finally revealed, he retorted, “You are the 'escort.' Your entire family are 'escorts!'”

Fika Amara, gadis bisu yang tiba-tiba dipersunting oleh seorang pria yang diperkenalkan oleh Syakila. Dikarenakan sudah lama ia memiliki kekurangan, dan Wijaya khawatir anaknya dimanfaatkan oleh laki-laki. Akhirnya ia menerima lamaran Danu, lelaki yang dikira baik. Namun, ternyata setelah beberapa tahun kemudian, Fika sendiri yang menemukan foto prewedding suaminya dengan wanita lain. Wanita itu Syakila, justru orang yang menjodohkan Fika dan Danu yang ternyata adalah orang yang berada di dalam foto tersebut. Bagaimana bisa terjadi? Baca cerita ini sampai tamat ya.

Mark Carlson and I had been a secret couple for three years. He was nothing but my boss at work. But at home, he treated me however he pleased, with no regard for my feelings. One day, I noticed him researching marriage. My heart leapt with joy. I prepared my proof of identity and other relevant documents, thinking he was finally ready, but he went to the marriage registration office with another woman. "You're married now. You should clean up things at home quickly,” one of his friends said, grinning. "Yeah, I should. But honestly, she does not have to leave entirely,” Mark replied with a smirk. I watched as everyone laughed, their faces filled with delight. Tears streamed down my face as I turned away. I pulled out my phone and called my childhood friend, Andy Selton. "You wanted to marry me, didn't you?” I asked, my voice trembling. Later, two weddings were held on the same day. Mark's face filled with regret as he stared at my wedding photo with Andy. In the middle of his ceremony, he left his bride behind and drove to find me. But by then, I was already married to my husband!