The Alpha's Scar

Linessa sat in the cold, dirty dungeon. It smelled rotten down here, a pungent scent that she’d been dwelling in for three days. Her legs felt weak even though she barely moved since she came down here.

She’d mostly been sitting…waiting, for him. Kenneth Drew; the love of her life…the same man the pack thought she didn’t deserve because she was infertile.

Did he think so too? Since she’d been in captivity, he hadn’t come see her.

No, she shook her head, the act making her feel a little dizzy. Kenneth didn’t think so, he told her…in fact, he promised her that he’d get her out of here. He said he’d try every way possible to get them to accept her again. That’s what he was doing now, he couldn’t waste any time coming down here, her trial was tomorrow night.

You see, this was the Night Howl Pack’s custom; a cruel tradition that she had tried to get rid of since the very moment she became Luna. Women were treated like mere breeders, the only thing that made them the least bit admirable here was having a child; more so a son.

Once mated, they were given five years to ‘breed’, and now her five years was up. Throughout those five years, Kenny had tried everything in his power to get her pregnant. This was a fear of his, one he dreaded happening, and now that it had come to pass, he was probably blaming himself.

But it wasn’t his fault, it was hers. She was the problem; the woman who couldn’t provide an heir, the woman who couldn’t provide a future for her own pack. It was silly, but she sometimes hated herself for it…sometimes she’d even imagined how Kenny’s life would be without her in it.

He’d probably have a child four or three years old. Perhaps it’d be a boy; one as strong and stubborn like his father or a girl strong too and well…stubborn just like him. She laughed at the thought until she remembered that if that were ever to happen, then she wouldn’t be the mother of that child…she wouldn’t even get to be his mate.

A shaky sigh left her lips as she tried to hold back the tears that glossed over her eyes. She shouldn’t think that way, but she couldn’t help it…and~

Linessa jerked forward when she heard the door slamming open from upstairs, and then Kenneth’s scent flooded in like a wave of fresh air.

petrichor and black coffee...

She inhaled deeply, dwelling in the comfort it gave. He was finally coming to see her, did he find a way to get her out?

She scrambled to her feet, her legs trembling as she rushed towards the iron bars. Her eyes snagged at the untouched plates of food scattered on the floor; cold, hardened reminders of her hunger strike. If Kenneth saw that she hadn’t eaten, he’d get mad at her for disregarding her health…especially in a time like this.

Pushing them aside with her feet, in an attempt to hide them in the shadows of the wall, she watched as he came down with a  frantic smile spread widely across her face.

“Kenny…” she breathed, her fingers curling around the rusted iron. “I knew you’d come…I knew you wouldn’t just leave me here.”

He stopped right in front of her, the only thing keeping her from jumping in his arms was the bars of her cell. “No, Linessa…of course I wouldn’t leave you in here. In fact, you’re leaving tonight…the council is ready.”

“What? But my trial is tomorrow. I was supposed to be given four days before trial.”

“You know how impatient the council gets. They want to get rid of you, and they want to do it now. I’ve tried coming up with a solution for all of this, and I agreed that the faster we get this done, the less time you’ll have to stay in this god awful place.”

“Did you find a way around the system?”

“Linessa, you and I both know that this tradition has been what governed this pack and kept it going for hundreds of years. If I change that, the people will turn their backs on me. I won’t have a pack to lead anymore. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.” She reached forward, through the bars to touch his face. His face felt like silk beneath her fingers; so soft and flawless. “I know you tried your best.”

Her own words stung her on the tongue. It wasn’t okay. “Have you tried asking for a time extension? Just one year and we could keep trying. It could work, perhaps the goddess would finally give us a baby.”

“Oh…I didn’t think about that. Maybe in a year we really could have a child…a son, a daughter maybe…probably even twins running around the pack house like we and Katya used to when we were kids. Except, I don’t want that, Linessa…I never wanted that.”

“What? What do you mean?”

“Exactly what I said.” He gently took her wrist and moved her hand away from his face. “I never wanted that…at least not with you.”

“I don’t…I’m not following. Are you drunk? Although I don’t smell any liquor. Kenny, what are you trying to say?”

Her heart was beating fast, and the scent she found comfort in a minute ago felt cold now, like ice all around her.

There was no humor on his face, not even a slight smile…he seemed serious, way more serious than she’d ever seen him. “You not wanting that is impossible. You tried so hard. We went to the doctor every month for check-ups, and you looked for a solution in everything you could find, including medicinal teas.”

"And those teas...?" His eyes darkened. "What do you think they were for?"

His lips curved, not into a smile...but something strangely darker. "Certainly not to fix your infertility."

"Then what?" Linessa swallowed, her stomach dropping. "What were they for?"

Her hands trembled by her side, fingers digging into her palms. Kenneth couldn't have lied to her. He'd been her strength every time she felt weak...so then how...? Why was he saying all of this?

“You don’t get it, Linessa. Five years..."

His blue eyes held no sign of guilt. "Do you have any idea how exhausting is it pretending to love someone you were never meant to?"

He leaned closer, jaws tightened. "It was never you, Nessa..."

His gaze became definite, as if he was about to destroy her even more. "It's always been Katya, and the only way I could get rid of you seamlessly was by using the pack’s cruel tradition.”

“W-What…?” She stumbled back, looking at him in utter shock. Was she hearing things? Did Kenneth really just say that to her?

Her mouth tasted bitter and there was a bile in her throat, one that she couldn’t just swallow. She heard his words clearly, it was a matter of believing them.

Because how?

They’ve been together for five years. She thought he was happy, he at least pretended to be. This was just…his words were…

So that meant every comforting word he ever told her regarding her infertility was a lie…? Every I love you…every single moment they share was a lie…? A lie made to not just break her, but to get rid of her entirely.

How could he? How could he do this to her? And Katya…Katya was her best friend…they’d all been friends since they were kids…How could she do this to her…?

The dam behind her eyes broke and tears fell from it, dripping down her cheeks. Her heart was in pieces, shattered in her chest, and the matebond felt as though it was failing.

She no longer felt the need to draw closer to him…she felt the need to run. This wasn’t the Kenneth she knew, or maybe she didn’t know him at all.

“I’m not sorry, and nothing you say or do can force me to feel otherwise. You were the one who invaded our relationship, a weed in our garden of roses. I never loved you, even when the matebond tried to coerce me to. I didn’t feel not an ounce of pity when you cried in my arms about not being able to give me a child I was never going to let you have…” He let out a short airy breath, a sigh that indicated relief as he adjusted his gold watch. “Thank you for making this easy for me.”         

Linessa couldn’t speak, but what exactly did she have to say to him? She could ask ‘why?’, but he’d already explained it in detail, and yet, that question was the only thing that lingered on her tongue. "W-Why?"

He shrugged, no sign of certainty in those blank, blue eyes. "The initial attraction just wasn't there I guess, and the matebond didn't help one bit with that."

He leaned forward a little, glancing at the food filled plates she tried to hide. "I think I'm done here. In an hour or so, I'll send two of my men to come get you...but before that, I'd suggest you eat something. The night is going to be long and I'd hate for you to fall unconscious before your trial is over."

He stepped back, not sparing her another glance as he disappeared up the stairs.

Even when the dungeon doors slammed shut behind him, Linessa still stood in the same spot. Her muscles felt frozen; stiff, and her mind was still processing everything.

This wasn’t a dream…

She’d pinch herself, but the immense pain in her heart was enough confirmation. She’d been betrayed, played like a puppet on strings, unknowingly dwelling under Kenneth's palm, dancing to the tune of his fingers.

He used her gullibility against her. Her faith in him had been too strong, well not only in him, but her faith in Katya too. She trusted them to the point that when he came home drenched in her scent, she believed him when he said they were only wrestling during training...

Even when the marks on his skin looked like love bites that she hadn't placed on him.

Now though, she realized how much of a fool she was. Five years of her life gone down the drain...five years of her life wasted. Kenneth's scheme was brilliant; in a sickening way. Using the same laws she tried to get rid of to ruin her was the ultimate cruelty.

But it made no sense she cried now, crying could not save her...nor could it patch the cracks in her broken heart. She'd calmly accept her fate and leave the rest to the mercy of the goddess.

Stepping back until her back hit the wall, Linessa slid down to the floor in the corner of her cell. She didn't cry, no she just sat there...watching and waiting for the rest of her ruin to come.

The floor felt cold, but the hand she had laid against his face felt colder; dead.