When The Sun Sets

Sunsets for me are in their most beauteous form when it kisses the sea. The collision of it makes the most ravishing combination. With the sound of the waves crashing through the shore and the sky having its own painting event. With brilliant red, orange, and eternal yellow-brown colors playing its scheme. Capturing the naked eyes’ desire to see a miraculous sight. An apocalyptic, smokey dull scenario that always leaves me in awe.

The sunset for me symbolizes that even endings can cease beautifully. That falling down can mean that you were meant for that to rise again. To come back in a brighter and bolder state with the essence of peace, harmony, and the promise of renewal.

I am no artist nor a poetic person to describe it in a prodigious way. I play with my words with humbleness and simplicity. I dwell with my description in nakedness and purity. And I sort it out with my experiences.

Isn't that how we learn from things?

Family.

Friendship.

Passion.

Love.

We learn from it through our experiences in life. It's scary and amazing how the wounds and the scars can represent you. Your past, although carved in the deepest part of your heart, still contributed in your development. As who you are today.

I am not really an expert in friendship. I tend to be in a small circle with the same people I've been with ever since. My trust is hard to be earned. My family is typical and ordinary since I only have my mother and little sister with me. While I am in a wild pursuit to reach my dreams, and that is my passion. Love? I don't know what love is. Romantic relationships, in particular.

To delineate love is like to give birth to another wisdom. Because I never really learned what love is. Or what it does to a person's state of being. Some say that it makes you do stupid things and sacrifices. Hence, I don't want to do stupidity. I don't want to do trades and sacrifices. I don't want to experience romance that way. My desire in love is idealistic.

But if it's love for family and friends, that's another topic. That's another viewpoint.

Nevertheless, it came unexpectedly.

"Sebi!"

My head immediately turned when I heard the mention of my name. I was holding onto my bag tightly because I thought I was already missing!

Kumaway ako sa kaibigan kong kumakaway din mula sa table. She even stood up and jumped in joy as she motioned me to come. Nahihiya kong inilibot ang aking paningin sa paligid dahil ramdam kong pinagtitinginan na kami dahil sa kalikutan niya.

“Dito!” She was laughing as she pointed, shouting in glee.

I quickened my pace in embarrassment with how the people are watching us. Baka sumigawsigaw pa 'to at hindi tumigil sa pagtatalon niya roon at paghalakhak. She's gathering too much attention!

"Aba!" Mavros stared at me in surprise. Natatawa akong umirap sa kaniya at mas lumapad ang kaniyang ngisi. "Sino ka!?"

I chuckled as I place my bag at the empty seat beside, which I think, is mine to fill with.

Rein was already looking at me with her creepy smile and eyes dilated in enthusiasm. Nagulat na lang ako noong tinalon niya ang distansya namin at sumabit sa leeg ko! Sunod-sunod ang aking pag-ubo habang tinatanggal ang braso niyang nakapulupot sa akin.

"R-Rein!"

"Ay, sorry!" anito at agad na lumayo. Sa halip ay yinugyog na lang ako sa balikat habang tumitili. "Dumating ka!"

"Nakakarindi ang mga text mo," I uttered my annoyance and pushed her hands away from my bare shoulders. I was wearing my off shoulder floral blouse, paired with my skinny jeans and flat shoes. My black long hair in a loose as I let my natural mermaid curls do its flow of sway as I move.

Ngumisi siya. "Syempre, tagal na nating hindi nagkikita!"

"Summer, Rein. Bakasyon. Malamang nasa bahay lang ako."

"Kaya nga inaya kitang lumabas dahil alam kong nasa bahay ka lang!"

"Buti pumayag si Tita?" si Mav na mukhang hindi pa rin makapaniwala na dumating nga ako sa usapan.

Tumango lang ako bilang sagot at umupo na. The table is for four people at tatlo lang kami. Sila ang magkatabi sa unahan ko samantalang ang bag ko lang ang nasa bakanteng upuan sa tabi ko.

Tumayo si Mavros para mag-order. Alam na naman niya kung ano ang mga hilig namin. Noong bumalik na siya ay may dala ng resibo at seat number. Kinuha agad iyon ni Rein at nagreklamo na hindi iyon ang paborito niyang numero. She probably read another horoscope based on her astrological stuffs she believes in so much.

"Anong magagawa ko? Eh, 'yan nga ang ibinigay na number sa 'kin?" si Mavros.

Rein scowled at him. "Ikaw talaga ang dahilan kung bakit ako minamalas."

"'Di ka lang talaga lapitin ng s'werte."

“Angas mo, ah? Akala mo naman naligo ka today.”

“Naligo ako! Baka ikaw ang hindi?” patuya nitong sagot.

Sumabay ako sa tawanan nila at nakisali sa pang-aasar ni Mavros kay Rein. Tumigil lang kami at huminahon ang pagtawa noong mapansin na nakatingin na ang ibang mga kumakain sa amin, siguro ay naiingayan. We bowed our head in embarrassment as we giggle silently.

Ito ang una kong labas simula noong magbakasyon kami. Palibhasa’y taong bahay, pakiramdam ko’y isa na ako sa mga nakatambak sa bahay namin. I always enjoy the comfort of being at home rather than engaging myself outside. Kung hindi pa ako inaya at kinulit ni Rein na lumabas ay baka nabulok na ako roon. Tinatamad man ay sumunod na rin dahil isang buwan na ang nakalipas noong huli ko silang makasama.

"Ano, Sebi? Libre raw ni Mav ngayon sabi sa 'yo?" si Rein na nagpaparinig.

Mavros eyes widened and immediately frowned at her. "Demonyo ka talaga, 'no?"

Malakas na humalakhak si Rein samantalang pigil na pigil ko ang pag ngiti. Kahit ang waitress na naglalapag na ng mga ini-order namin ay hindi napigilan ang mahinang bungisngis. Ngumiti ako sa kaniya at nagpasalamat bago siya umalis. 

"Ang sarap talaga ng pagkain kapag libre."

"Puta, Rein, wala akong pera!" Mavros exclaimed. "Bahala ka magbayad d'yan, idadamay mo pa ako."

"Mm!" Rein ignored his laments and even closed her eyes as she munches the food. "Tikman mo, Sebi. Katas ng dugo at pawis ni Mavros 'yan."

"Mabulunan ka sanang hayop ka."

Umiling ako at tinawanan lang sila.

Nangangalhati na ako sa pagkain noong tumunog ang cellphone ko na nasa ibabaw ng lamesa. Iignorahin ko na sana iyon ngunit agad na namilog ang aking mga mata noong makita kung sino 'yon! Before I could even grab it, Rein already did!

"Bakit tumatawag sa 'yo si Rafael!?" aniyang gulat na gulat. Kahit si Mavros na sinilip ang cellphone ko ay halos lumuwa ang mga mata sa panlalaki.

I bit my lower lip and quickly snatched my phone away from them. I declined the call and immediately set my phone into silent mode. I should have done that before I came here!

"May number ka niya!?" Rein gasped in realization. "Hoy! May number ka niya!?"

I groaned and nodded my head as a reply. Mas lalo siyang napasinghap.

"Bakit?"

"Kasi meron ako?" I muttered.

"Tinatawagan ka niya? Bakit?"

"Mang-aasar lang 'yon."

"Sinasagot mo naman?"

I tilted my head. "H-Hindi."

“Girl, si Rafael Alfonzo 'yan!”

"Pakialam ko naman sa kaniya?"

“What the hell?” she snorted. “Rafael Alfonzo, yung lagi mong kaaway! Bakit siya tumatawag sa ‘yo? Close na kayo? Don’t tell me kayo na!?”

Namilog ang mga mata ko at mabilis na umiling. "Mukha ba akong papatol sa kaniya, Rein?"

"Kaya nga!" sabat ni Mav. "OA ‘to! Baka magtatanong lang ng assignment?"

“Bakasyon, bobo ka ba?”

He chuckled. “Ay, oo nga pala.”

“Saka si Rafael? Sa yabang no’n, magtatanong ng assignment kay Sebi?” she scoffed in disbelief. “Baka pumuti muna ang mga uwak bago pa man mangyari ‘yon.”

I bit my lower lip and nodded my head guiltily. Pumuti na nga ba ang mga uwak?

“Ano nga?” pangungulit niya pa. “Bakit siya tumatawag sa ‘yo?”

“Hindi ko alam. Hindi ko naman sinagot.”

“Bakit hindi mo sinagot?”

“Bakit ang dami mong tanong?” naiinis kong sambit.

She sneered at me. “Siguro kayo na, ‘no? Siguro crush mo siya!”

I grimaced with her suggestion and rolled my eyes. “Hindi ko siya type.”

“Gago, kapal naman ng mukha mo?” tumatawa niyang sabi kaya lalo ko siyang sinamaan ng tingin. “Choosy ka pa! Eh, ang gwapo no’n!”

Inilapag ko ang chopsticks ko at inilahad ang kamay. "Hindi ko type si Rafael. Ayoko sa kaniya. Akala mo kung sino, hindi naman siya ganoon ka gwapo kung tutuusin.”

Biglang namilog ang mga mata niya at natatarantang umayos ng upo. Kumunot ang noo ko pero dahil sa pagkainis at kagustuhan na idiin ang aking punto, nagpatuloy ako.

"Mukhang itlog kaya ‘yon—”

I flinched when a warm hand suddenly touched my bare shoulders. The familiar smell of his perfume alarmed my whole system. Nagtaasan ang balahibo ko noong maramdaman ang kaniyang hininga sa aking leeg dahil sa pagtungo at paglapit ng mukha. I can feel his hot breath touching my ear as he breathes and I can't help but to close my eyes tightly when my heart literally skipped a beat!

"Are you enjoying?" he whispered in a low voice. Boses pa lang, kilala ko na kung sino.

I groaned. "Hands off."

"Why?" aniya. "Shouldn't you apologize first?"

"Bitaw, Rafael." Inalis ko ang kaniyang kamay sa balikat ko at inilayo ang katawan sa kaniya. Hindi rin ako lumingon dahil baka may mangyaring hindi ko magustuhan. His face is probably inches away from me and I wouldn't take the risk!

I heard him snickered. Hindi ako lumingon at nagpatuloy muli sa pagkain na parang walang nangyari. Shit! I should calm down.

"N-Nandito pala sila Renz," ani Rein habang nakalingon sa kaliwa niya at tila may tinatanaw mula roon.

Mariin akong pumikit at huminga nang malalim. Nandito sila? Kailan pa? Nauna ba sila rito?

"Dahan-dahan, Sebi.” Inabutan ako ng tissue ni Mavros. "Baka masamid ka."

Tinanggap ko ito at pinahiran ang aking bibig. Napatingin ako sa cellphone ko noong makitang umilaw dahil sa text na dumating. Padabog ko iyong kinuha at binuksan para basahin.

From: Rafael

Backstabber.

Inis akong nag-reply.

To: Rafael

Bakit ka ba nandito?

From: Rafael

I should be the one who's asking that. Nauna ako rito, Siorse. Maybe you followed me here.

To: Rafael

Pity, that’s the least that I’ll do.

From: Rafael

At least you still considered it though. Amonpolo tayo mamaya, mamalasin ka buong araw kapag hindi ka pumayag.

To: Rafael

Hindi ako nag paalam kay Mama.

From: Rafael

Ako na, tawagan ko mamaya. Malakas naman ako kay Tita.

To: Rafael

Oh? Edi paampon ka na.

"Mag ka-text ba kayo?" si Rein.

From: Rafael

Don’t want you to be my sister. Hard pass.

Padabog kong inilapag ang cellphone sa lamesa, dahilan para magulat ang dalawa kong kaibigan.

Mav asked, "Ayos ka lang?"

Tumango ako at nagpatuloy na lang muli sa pagkain.

I don't know how it started. Heck, I don't even know how it happened. One day, I just found myself being close with him. Especially that particular day in Amonpolo when the sun kissed the sea. Ang paglubog ng araw noong araw na ‘yon ay naging isang malaking simbolo ng pagbabago sa buhay ko… dahil naging parte siya nito.

Rafael Alfonzo isn’t my cup of tea. We are so far from being alike. That’s why the people around us have been witnessing our endless arguments against each other. Kami ang aso’t pusa sa loob ng ENHS. Tila isang daily routine na namin ang pikunin ang isa't isa.

But outside the school, we are far from being enemies.

Rafael Alfonzo isn’t my cup of coffee, but he’s the epitome of innocence and peace. The solace of my home, the bliss of my sorrows. The love for my hatred, the calm of my storm.

He isn’t my favorite person, but he is my comfort person.

Hindi iyon alam ng lahat.

The only reason that I can justify for our unexpected friendship is our love for sunsets. To watch the sun falls down and be replaced by the moon, with him beside me, is beyond my rational thoughts. The slanting rays of the setting sun gave a warm orange tinge with the clouds and the replacement of the pale crescent moon shone like a silvery hook in the night sky. While Rafael… is the harmony of the in between.

He's very different when we're alone together. It feels like I was with another person and there was this non-existent Rafael Alfonzo somewhere. And the confusing part is, I am starting to like both sides of him. Like there's this thin line that I shouldn't cross but I am unconsciously doing. For I was too mesmerized with how he makes me feel.

I don't really know when I started watching him instead of my favorite view. I was slowly changing my preferences and I can't believe that it's for someone I didn't expect of.

It's just when the sun sets, that's when the walls fall down. That's when I get to feel the comfort of something too surreal. Realizing that even the simplest things in life can be the most inspirational. That's when I get to feel that unfamiliar satisfaction I savor as another discovery for me. That’s when I let myself see him as someone else.

I turned my head on my left side and I instantly caught his eyes. Like he was actually waiting for me to take a sight of him. I saw how his eyes gleamed when that happened and his mouth formed a sly smirk. I immediately tore my eyes off him. My heart leaped.

Until now, I still can't explain why.