جميع فصول : الفصل -الفصل 40

Drasa's POVI couldn't believe what was happening to me. Here I was, pressed against this wall, kissing Cassian like I was starving for him. My whole body felt like it was on fire, and every place his hands touched sent electric shocks through me.His hands were roaming all over my body now, exploring every curve, and I was letting him. More than letting him, I was enjoying every single second of it. The way he touched me made me feel beautiful, desired, like I was something precious he couldn't get enough of.Part of my brain was screaming at me to pull away, to stop this before it went too far. This wasn't like me at all. I didn't do things like this, didn't make out with guys at parties, didn't let anyone touch me like this. But I couldn't make myself stop.Maybe it was the alcohol making me feel so bold, so reckless. Or maybe it was just Cassian himself, the way he looked at me like I was the only person in the world who mattered. Whatever it was, I found myself holding him tighte

Drasa's POVI woke up with my head pounding like someone was hammering inside my skull. The sunlight coming through our dorm window felt way too bright, and my mouth tasted awful. For a few seconds, I just lay there wondering why I felt so terrible.Then it all came rushing back.The party. The bathroom. Cassian's hands on me. His lips against mine. The way I had kissed him back like I was starving for him.My face burned with embarrassment, and I quickly pulled my pillow over my head. What had I been thinking? Actually, that was the problem, I hadn't been thinking at all.I peeked over at Maya's bed. She was still fast asleep, her hair spread across her pillow like a fan. At least she couldn't see me having a mental breakdown right now.It was sunday morning, which meant no classes. Maybe I could just hide in bed all day and pretend last night never happened. But then I remembered I had a pile of dirty clothes that desperately needed washing.I groaned and forced myself to sit up. My

Cassian’s POVI stood in the middle of the sidewalk, watching her disappear around the corner, her hoodie bouncing with every furious step.She didn’t look back once.I dragged a hand down my face, biting down the frustration burning in my chest like wildfire. This wasn’t how I’d planned it, not even close. I wasn’t supposed to push her, I was supposed to help her feel seen, like this storm she was stuck in wasn’t hers to weather alone. And instead, I dragged her out in the open, again acted like I wasn't bothered about what was going on. Like a fool, like I hadn’t learned anything.“Smooth, lover boy,” Kai’s voice echoed from behind me. “You’ve really got a way with the ladies. Kidnap them, confuse the hell out of them, then piss them off so much they vanish like smoke.”I turned, glaring. “Can you just….shut the hell up for once?”He raised his hands in mock surrender, that stupid smirk still etched into his face. “Hey, don’t shoot the reader of things. You’re the one out here h

Cassian POVYou would think after everything, she would at least look at me.But Monday proved me wrong, again.She walked into class with that same stiff posture, her hoodie drawn up like armor, eyes hidden behind heavy eyes and a stare aimed directly at the floor. There was a time I used to sit beside her and she'd smile before I even said anything.Now? She sat alone, and I—I still sat with her.I didn’t care that she moved her body away from me. I didn’t care that she hadn’t spoken to me in a whole day. I still took the seat next to her, just like I always did. I guess part of me thought if I stayed long enough, she’d remember what it felt like to have me there but she didn’t.She didn’t even blink when I said her name under my breath, or when I gently nudged her elbow with mine. Nothing, I might as well have been invisible.It hurt more than I thought it would and I keep wondering why I feel this way, nobody has ever made me feel this way.After class, I gave her space. Thought

Drasa’s POVI barely made it to the dorm, the weight of every stare and whispered conversation pressing down on me with every step. Fingers pointed as I passed, people exchanged looks, but I didn’t care. Let them talk, let them judge, nothing new.I walked faster, not wanting to deal with their judgment for another second. As soon as I reached the door of my room, I pushed it open, barely taking a breath before stepping inside. Maya was sitting at her desk, buried in her books, headphones on, completely lost in whatever she was studying. I closed the door quietly behind me, leaning against it for a moment, just taking in the comfort of being in a space where I didn’t have to pretend to be anyone else but myself.I slipped off my hoodie and tossed it on the bed, the weight of the day pulling at me. I just needed a few minutes to breathe in fresh air.Maya didn’t even look up at first. I could hear the soft click of her pen as she scribbled notes. It was always the same focused and d