Too Late to Love me Now のすべてのチャプター: チャプター 31 - チャプター 40

“Ayman, my boy, welcome!” Dad said, genuinely excited.“Good evening, sir. I hope you’re doing well,” Ayman replied.I just stood there beside them, watching closely, hoping everything would go smoothly. For now, Dad’s reaction and the warm welcome were reassuring me.“Claire,”“Yes, Dad?”“Let us know if everything’s ready so we can sit down. In the meantime, we can chat a bit.”“Okay, Dad. I’ll go check.”Ayman and I shared a quick glance before he followed Dad into the living room. That faint smile stayed on his face—he seemed just as pleased with this little exchange.I hoped Dad wouldn’t rush things, but I knew Ayman didn’t mind at all.Just as I stepped into the kitchen doorway, something caught my attention.“Lili?”She wasn’t beside me.I turned around and saw her sitting right next to Dad, listening quietly as if nothing were unusual, absorbing every word of their conversation.I couldn’t help but laugh lightly, hands on my hips. Even with Jason, she’d never shown such enthus

“No, Claire!” I kept repeating to myself.“How would he see it? Sure, he has a bit of free time right now, but that doesn’t mean he’s free for me…”“Or maybe just a few minutes would be enough to really know? What should I do? How am I supposed to be sure of my feelings for him?”I had to do it…I had to have a conversation with him, open my heart, and finally say everything I’d been forcing myself to bury deep down.My doubts, my fears, my anxieties, my apprehensions… I thought I had to tell him everything and put into words all those signs that weren’t really invisible.“I’m going. I’m taking this risk. Even if it means stopping and just being real friends, nothing more, I’m going all the way.”“I’m going. We’ll probably have a good evening. At least we’ll know, and it’ll feel so good.”Hours later, after classes, I stopped by the supermarket to get us something for lunch so he wouldn’t have to worry about a thing.When I finally arrived, the closer I got, the more nervous I became.

“Jason?! Here?!!” I exclaimed.I didn’t wait a second longer. I marched over, determined to make him understand he was not welcome.“What are you doing here? You don’t belong here! Are you trying to reassure yourself that I’m still broken after what you and your mistress did?”He just stood there, facing me, saying nothing…And in his eyes, that coldness, that distance he always had toward me… it was gone.In front of me was a disarmed Jason.“Claire, please, listen to me.”“Why should she listen to you? You haven’t stopped hurting her. And anyway, what are you doing here? You don’t belong here. Go!” Lili interjected, furious.“What’s going on here?!” Dad’s hoarse voice rang through the room as he arrived.“Jason?! What are you doing here?!”“Dad, I… I am…”“Dad, tell him to leave,” I blurted, completely shaken.Dad stepped toward me.“Claire, my child. Calm down. Part of the reason he came is because of me. I’ve been expecting him for months, but he never wanted to come.”“What, Dad?

“Why are you saying that? Aren’t you tired of playing with other people’s feelings? Ayman is in love with someone it’s true and your eyes know exactly who. If your goal is to hurt me even more than you already have, know this: I’ve moved on. Now go. Leave me alone, once and for all.”“Claire, listen to me once and for all! I won’t repeat myself!” she snapped, then continued immediately.“Ayman loves you with all his heart. Even if it pisses me off because I love him, and I realized way too late that I could never live up to his love. He’s the only man who truly loved me the way I deserved. He’s head over heels for you, and that kiss we shared—it wasn’t even meant by him. I caught him off guard.”It was like a slap to my face.I stood frozen in front of her. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.That image came crashing back into my mind. Everything felt so real. In my head, everything was tangled. I didn’t know what to believe, what to say, what to think. I was just there—disarmed, s

I was happy againDid love save me? No, I wouldn’t say it like thatAyman’s love taught me to love myself first in everythingLove doesn’t just bring two people togetherIt brings together two people who know how to loveAnd to know how to love, you must first become the reflection of the love you want to giveBecause loving yourself is the first sign of a blooming soulAre you living a life that crushes your self-worth?Are you with someone who drags you down and makes you doubt your own value?Do your friendships dim your light instead of lifting you up?Then take a step back and ask yourself the right questionsYou’re losing yourselfAnd I lost myself tooI let myself get trapped in a marriage that didn’t make me happyAnd I hesitated for so long to choose myself, even when the worst things were happening right in front of my eyesBut I stayed because I wasn’t listening to myselfBecause I put everyone’s feelings before mineBecause I abandoned myselfNo MoreThrough our meeting, I