Black Humor Jokes

I, Xavier Locke, had married the same woman, Melanie Slater, seven times. But for the sake of her first love, Leonard Blueman, she divorced me seven times. The first time we got married, she told me, "I'll only love you for the rest of my life." But every time Leonard came back to the country, she sang a different tune. "Can't you be more sensible? How can you bear to stand by and let Lenny be called a homewrecker who snatches a married woman from her husband?" The first time we divorced, I cut my wrists to make her stay. I was taken to the hospital in an ambulance, but she never showed up even once to see me. The third time we divorced, I humbled myself and applied to be her assistant at her company. I did that just so I could see her a little more. By the sixth divorce, I had learned to quietly pack my things and move out of the home we shared. My hysteria, my repeated backing down, and my tolerant compromises brought me nothing—just Melanie repeatedly divorcing and remarrying me. Time and time again, she pulled the same trick. With history repeating itself, I decided enough was enough. After hearing that Leonard was coming back again, this time, I handed her the divorce papers myself. As always, she set a date for our next remarriage. But what she didn't know… was that I was leaving for good this time.

Drogada y engañada, dio a luz en medio de una tragedia: su hijo fue declarado falsamente muerto al nacer. Consumida por el dolor, desapareció… pero años después, regresó con su hija y un hijo adoptivo, impulsada por un deseo implacable de vengarse de quienes arruinaron su vida y la de su difunta madre. Pero el destino tenía preparado un giro impactante: su hijo está vivo… y su padre es un poderoso CEO.

(Warning 🔞) “Dari semua pria… kenapa kamu menciumku?” --Xeyren. “Karena kurasa, dunia ini telah salah menentukan tokoh antagonisnya.” --Lovelle. *** Lovelle White tewas setelah bunuh diri karena terjun dari jembatan, saat tiga orang pria hendak memperkosanya. Namun alih-alih mati, Lovelle justru masuk ke dalam dunia novel yang belum selesai ia baca, dan terbangun di dalam tubuh salah satu tokoh bernama Daniela. Daniela adalah pelayan sekaligus mata-mata yang bertugas mengawasi Xeyren Crow, sang tokoh antagonis sekaligus pria paling berbahaya dalam cerita. Namun masalahnya, Daniela pun mati di halaman ke-lima, dan di tangan Xeyren. Maka untuk mengubah takdir tragis itu, Lovelle pun melakukan sesuatu... Yaitu mencium Xeyren. Dan malam itu, Lovelle selamat dari kematian. Namun alur cerita yang semakin melenceng jauh membuat Lovelle terjebak bersama Xeyren dan dunianya yang gelap. Lalu apa yang terjadi saat Luca Montclair, sang tokoh protagonis sekaligus karakter utama dalam buku, juga menginginkan Lovelle? Terjebak dalam dunia novel, di antara penjahat dan pahlawan, Lovelle pun semakin yakin bahwa cerita ini memang sudah salah... Sejak awal mulanya. ***

“Fuck…please…” He risks a nibble, sending shockwaves to my core. My back arches off the wall with a sharp moan. His hand slides between my legs, cupping my soaking panties. “Look how wet you are,” he whispers, “...shaking, and I haven’t even fucked you yet.” He strokes my clit gently first, then harder. My toes curl, hair spilling into my sweaty face. He’s breaking me, ruining me with just his tongue and fingers. I can’t speak. I can’t think. I just tremble in his arms. ********* The night I caught my fiancé cheating, something in me broke. I cried. I screamed. I drove — into the rain, into nowhere, into him. Cassian Cross. A stranger with gray eyes, a sinful mouth, and hands that made me forget my name. One night was all it took. One reckless mistake to burn away my heartbreak. Until he showed up at my mom’s wedding… As my new stepbrother. Now, Cassian won’t stop. He corners me in hallways, whispers filth at the altar, and looks at me like he still owns my body. But there’s one thing he didn’t tell me— He already belongs to someone else. A fiancée bound to him by a contract… and a secret that could destroy us both. He’s dangerous. He’s forbidden. He’s promised to another. And God help me, I still can’t stop wanting him.

Aiden, the perfect golden boy from a powerful, conservative family, lives a life ruled by expectations. When his longtime crush and roommate Peter leaves him to live with his boyfriend, Aiden’s carefully built world starts to crack. A drunken night leads to a mysterious hookup with a stranger named Ryder — someone wild, confident, and everything Aiden’s family despises. When Ryder turns out to be Aiden’s new roommate — and the son of his father’s corporate rival — their lives collide. What starts as mutual hatred turns into a complicated partnership filled with fights, attraction, and family secrets that neither of them are prepared for. But when the truth about Ryder’s past and Aiden’s family’s crimes surface, both must decide whether their love is worth more than revenge.

Isidora Moretti always appeared to be a chess player, overseeing her family’s massive enterprise and grappling with the city’s menacing mafia clans. Her father orders her to marry the Vescari heir, and she discovers that theirs is not romance that would involve love-it is of power and obedience. Declining could be her last word so she thinks of an escape-engagement, a lie she is betting would work. She teams up with Dante Romano,the boy who beats her every time in school. He is good looking, cold, smart and has chased the same deal she wants. He often mocks her stubborn ways and never offers real help. Still, he oddly agrees to act as her fiancé. The agreement sees only looks, no real feeling involved. It may mean just a clever contract. Business agreement looks clean, no feelings. But Dante seizes Isidora at the engagement party and kisses her in front of the city. Everything becomes upside down. Rivalry and obsession — everything seems to blur. Others soon witness Isidora as Dante’s Achilles’ heel. In another world, weakness is a weapon. Maybe they both have this tilt, not just one side. With threats growing closer-in business offices ,back alleys, and mob hits, both find they need to stand up together. As they fight, they come closer and closer, and each threat reduces the boundaries they’ve constructed between them on their feelings. As danger narrows in on Isidora, Dante’s left to contemplate the sacrifices he’ll make just to keep her safe. He’ll do anything he can to protect her, to make her his, even if it’s damaging everything in his path. In the end, the promises they’ve made, no matter how unserious, appear to be the only thing they can reasonably believe.

Which one makes your life hard? Falling in love with an idol or falling in love with one of your best friends? What if you have fallen in love with your best friend who became an idol? Will it be easy then? Vian and Jay are my best friends and we have been together for more than half of our lives and then I ruined everything by falling in love. To make it worse, he just became a star in the sky and I can only yearn for him from down here like million others on this earth. How could you move on and forget a person who you have fallen in love with and also your best friend?

Enise had a simple life dream, find her mate and live a happy life. When Alpha Lucas proposes marriage, she agrees immediately. What Enise didn't expect was to fall into a well crafted plot. It turns out that Alpha Lucas was only looking for an heir. When she gives birth to her daughter, she is snatched away and send to a mental asylum where she escapes death. Five years later, she is back to take revenge on all those who hurt her.

Ariana Lincoln thought heartbreak was the worst thing she’d face the night she walked in on her boyfriend and best friend in the bathroom of a nightclub. But when a reckless, drunken mistake with a mysterious stranger spirals into a shocking discovery, her life changes forever. The man she slept with? Jaxon Devereaux—her father’s billionaire boss and the most powerful CEO in the world. Thrown into a forbidden web of Lust, Ariana finds herself working under the ruthless man who haunts her every thought—and who wants nothing more than to break her. But secrets don’t stay buried for long. As danger circles from every side, and Jaxon’s twisted past unravels. Ariana must find away to survive without getting burned. He was her father’s boss. She was his forbidden mistake. But what happens when that mistake becomes everything?

Lumaki si Antonella Martinez sa Canada. Pero napilitan siyang bumalik sa Pilipinas nang mabalitaan niyang inatake sa puso ang kanyang ama. Sa kanyang pagbabalik, hindi niya inaasahan na ito na pala ang huling pagkakataong makikita niya ito. Bago pumanaw ang kanyang ama ay inihabilin na pala niya ito sa pangangalaga ng stepbrother nito. Laking gulat ni Antonella nang malamang isa palang kilalang Governor ang Uncle niya. At mas lalo siyang nabigla nang sa una pa lang nilang pagkikita ay tila may kakaiba na siyang naramdaman para sa lalaking halos doble ang edad sa kanya. Si Gabriel Ignacio ay isang Gobernador. Sa edad na thirty-eigth, kilala siya bilang walang oras sa pag-ibig. Pero magbabago ang lahat nang mapunta sa kanyang pangangalaga si Antonella. Mapipigilan ba niya ang kanyang damdamin? O tuluyan siyang mahuhulog sa alindog ng dalagang itinuring niyang responsibilidad?