Bolehkah Aku Menangis Novels & Stories

she said softly, “you know you’re my only friend. I don’t like to see you like this. What is it this time?” I sniffled, wiping my nose on the back of my hand. “Right now I’m crying a lot,” I whispered, my voice breaking. “I’m never going to hide it anymore. It’s… it’s okay to cry, right?” I looked up at her, searching her face for reassurance. “Linda… are all men liars?” She tilted her head, a small, sympathetic smile tugging at her lips. “Yeah. Of course. In my opinion, it’s in their DNA. They can’t help it.”

I’ve never cried like that before. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve shed tears over the years, sometimes it’s difficult to keep it all in. But letting go and crying until my throat is raw, my head aches and I can barely breathe? I haven’t done that since I was a little girl.

"I'm sorry, Mrs. Lavigne. I was carried away." "It's alright, darling. You're very much allowed to cry. Don't think that the saying, 'big men don't cry' is true. It's not. People cry because it's the only thing that can make us feel better. Crying is also one form of surrendering ourselves to God. Always remember that."

AMBROSE I know myself and I know for a fact that I don’t cry, not because crying is for the weak but because I like to think that I’m tough enough and that I can take a lot of things without resulting to a pitiful break down. However, after how everything had piled up unexpectedly, tonight’s going to be a whole different story for me. Tears just began cascading down on my cheeks giving me this notion that I’ve reached my limit. I don’t even know I have a limit in the first place, but tonight was a ballooning testament that I can only take certain things at once.

Oh my dear sweet mother! I can't even make out any words cos I can't even explain anything to her without letting out the whole truth which goes against the stupid contract. I just burst into uncontrollable tears. “ let it out dear, let it all out" I can hear her say as she continuously pat's on my head. I'm angry and since I'm powerless I'm this situation, the only thing I can do is cry. Cry the hurt out. I wish I could have done more like shoot his stupid eyes, or break the stupid hands he used to keep me trapped or destroy his vocal cords so that I can't hear his seductive voice anymore. I keep crying until I give in and let sleep take over.

I⁠ w​ipe‌d benea‍th⁠ my eyes,​ but th‌e t‍ear‌s kept comin⁠g. “I wasn’t suppose‌d to​ c⁠ry to‍day.” “You’⁠r⁠e all‌ow⁠ed t⁠o cry.” “I’ve cried en​ough lat⁠e‍ly.⁠” “Then⁠ thes‌e⁠ can b⁠e hap⁠‍py t‌ears.‍​” I looked at he‌r, and that‌ so‌‍me‍h‌ow ma‌d​‍e⁠ me cry⁠‌ ha​rder.

Tears flow from my eyes helplessly. I just hope that my mother tells me that this is a practical joke, because all the anger and helplessness that I feel inside me is building up with previous sequels, and if I explode, it will not be pleasant at all. -What are you telling me, mom? I shake my head and I don't even bother to hide what I feel, I don't bother to wipe the little drops of salty water that run down my cheeks.

“Won’t she die in the process of giving birth?” “How will I cope??” “Will I be able to see her funny smiles??” “Will I be able to hear her funny jokes??” “Will I be able to laugh and play like I use to??” “Will I be able to see her teasing me??” ‘Can I even do without her being by my side?” All these troops into my head as tears rolled down my cheeks The tears rolled down continuously and I couldn’t control it anymore as it keeps on flowing down from my eye lid.

"I'm just scared, I'll break down and cry" "That would be perfect for you" "How?". I move in my bed. "Have you cried since she passed?" I nod. "No". "You need to get it out of you". I laugh. "I can't be seen crying?" "Nooo... Don't talk BS. Call me and cry. I'm willing to listen to you, anytime, every time" "Thank you". I replied. "Has Malik called?" "He's not going to call, that guy has pride the size of an elephant"

The tears behind my eyes sting like hell, but I refuse to let them fall. I refuse to cry. I refuse to break. And sound that rips from my throat isn’t a sob—it’s one hell of a growl.