Dad Joke Pick Up Lines Novels & Stories

“You paid me to fuck you raw, Lilah. Now you’re carrying my baby… and I’m nowhere near done with you.” Lilah Moreau wanted revenge. After catching her politician fiancé balls-deep in another woman on the night of their engagement party, she did the one thing guaranteed to destroy her “perfect fiancée” image. She hired the most expensive, most sinful callboy in the city. No names. No strings. Just one night of filthy, no-limits sex. The man who showed up was pure sin — tall, tattooed, brutally dominant, and dangerously skilled. He fucked her like he owned her. He made her scream, beg, and come harder than she ever had in her life. By morning, she left ten thousand dollars on the nightstand and disappeared without a trace. Four months later… she’s pregnant. And the callboy is back. Except he isn’t a callboy at all. He’s Damien Vale — ruthless billionaire, CEO of Vale Capital, and a man who never forgets what belongs to him. Now he’s standing in her living room, eyes dark with raw possession, one large hand possessively rubbing over her slightly swollen belly. “You ran from me once, little wife,” he murmurs, voice low and filthy. “Paid me like a whore and thought you could hide my child from me. Cute.” He leans in, lips brushing her ear: “Time to pay up properly… with this sweet pregnant pussy, every single night.

Waking up hungover next to my arch-nemesis – the city's most notorious fuckboy? Worst. Morning. Ever. I handled the walk of shame with icy dignity, but fate had a bigger curveball: one month later, two pink lines. My baby. My rules. His involvement? Zero. My flawless plan hit a snag when morning sickness ambushed me in the office restroom. He walked in. His eyes locked onto my still-flat stomach, darkening with something dangerous. Before I could blink, he had me pinned against the cold tile wall. "Who's the father?" he growled. I met his glare with a frosty smirk. "Wouldn't you like to know? Definitely not you." Then it happened: a hot tear hit my neck. His voice cracked, raw and desperate. "Don't... don't leave me. Please." Me: ...Dude. Seriously? THIS IS YOURS!

A tragic love story of a happily married couple; when Nicholas lost his memory due to an accident at work, Reign does all she can to help him remember who is she. But it isn't so easy, because his family and a controlling ex try all they can to keep the two apart. Can Reign help Nicholas remember?

After my mate, Drew Bruce, vanished from the pack warzone, I cared for his gravely ill parents in his stead for three years. In the end, he returns with his wolf missing and a young she-wolf by his side. He begs for the Alpha King to break our mate bond. Drew taunts me, "Jenny Watson, your peaceful life in the pack is thanks to my bloodshed on the battlefield. You'll never be someone like Sherry Lowe, an outstanding physiotherapist, who can fight alongside me. "It's a good thing our mind link has disappeared ever since I lost my wolf. Being with Sherry made me realize how dull you are. "You're useless. If it weren't for the Moon Goddess' guidance, you would've never been worthy of being my mate." When his parents find out, instead of talking him out of it, they fully support his decision. They completely disregard the dedication and sincerity I showed them over three years. Heartbroken, I turn and leave for the field hospital. He has no idea that I come from a long line of healers. When I earn the title of chief field healer with nothing but my own skill, he goes mad with regret.

"You've been in denial for so long, Addison ndria." His voice was husky and heavy with lust. "Do you really want me to stop?" I could not bring myself to say no. My best friend's stepdad was like the devil, making me find so much pleasure in sin. "You can't even say no," he chuckled, letting go of my hand finally. They moved to my face and he stared into my eyes, while his other hand still worked wonders between my legs. "Don't make me do this," I finally said, moaning the words out. "Please." "Tell me to stop one more time and I will," he mumbled. "Please, st—" I didn't complete my words because he captured my lips with his.  *+*+*+*+*+*+* Addison Rodriguez never expected to feel any sexual tension or fall in love with her best friend's stepdad. As she surrenders to the sexual tension, her loyalty to her best friend wavers, especially when she finds out that he is secretly a Mafia Lord trying to hide in plain sight and that her best friend's life is in danger, her loyalty is tested even further. Would she reveal his secret to protect her best friend, or keep it to protect her love?

After Nathan Seville stands me up for the seventh time we're supposed to register our marriage, I finally cut all ties with him—completely and on my own terms. If he shows up at a gathering, I don't go. If he's invited to perform at the college anniversary, I leave early. The moment my company decides to work with him, I resign on the spot. Even on Christmas Eve, when he shows up at my house with gifts, I make up an excuse about needing to visit someone. Calls? Blocked. Socials? Deleted. My strategy is simple—cut it all off. I don't reach out, and he has no way of finding me. For the first 30 years of my life, I spent most of it loving him with everything I had. I cared for him, supported him, and waited for him. But after being left hanging for the seventh time at the City Hall, I finally wake up. I don't want to live like this anymore. Even if I end up alone, it's still better than spending night after night waiting in an empty house that never feels like home!

⚠️ WARNING: Cowards stay out! No one under 18 allowed! ⚠️ Ava slept with the Mafia boss! Upon discovering her fiancé’s illicit relationship with her cousin, she learned they planned to sell her into the red-light district. Shattered physically and emotionally, Ava was in despair when the Mafia leader invited her to join his world. Alexander Clark was a notorious villain, cold and distant, with no feelings at all. People either froze or trembled at the sight of him; he was more terrifying than the devil. What happens when this devil invites you into his world? What happens when her savior starts to fall for her? He is her nominal uncle. Will she love him back? Will he be able to protect her when her fiancé tries to take her away? What will Alex do when he finds out her fiancé plans to sell her to the highest bidder?

“Next time I see you, I’m not letting you walk away.” The stranger said as Nova wiped his cum off her lips. Nova was a quiet, shy, and bookish girl… also very innocent. At least, that’s what everyone thought. Until one filthy game of truth or dare in an exclusive club stripped away her innocence and left her kneeling in the dark… mouth full of a stranger’s thick cock, swallowing every drop of his release without ever knowing his name. She fled after he finished. But he didn’t forget and neither did she. And the next day, when she followed her best friend to her father’s luxurious estate for his 45th birthday dinner, she locked eyes with the last man she expected to see— The man she gave head to the night before. Her best friend’s dad. Now he knows. Now he wants her. And Nova’s filthy little secret? She wants him too.

I've been pent up for far so long that my hormones are going out of balance. So, I decide to visit a massage parlor that my best friend has recommended to me, hoping that I can completely get rid of the sense of emptiness that's inside me. When the young and well-built masseuse begins caressing me with his scalding palms, I feel the flames of lust burning brighter within me to the point they are about to swallow my rationality whole…

“Do you want to know how this works?” he whispered.“Yes!” I gasped in response to his tug on my hair. “I want to know.”“Yes, what?” he asked, causing my mind to swirl with the realization of what he was into.“Yes, sir. I can be a good girl.” ****For Becca, going to Miami brought up old childhood memories with her best friend, Tally. She needed the break after a rough year attending Yale and a break-up with her boyfriend, Chad. She didn’t expect for her summer of fun to include sleeping with James, the Italian Stallion–Tally’s father.Knowing it’s wrong, she allows James to pull her into a vortex of pleasure that has her breaching the surface of reality and grasping for survival. Can Becca endure this pleasure without Tally finding out?Or will her secrets cause her world to crash around her?Submitting to My Best Friend’s Dad is created by Scarlett Rossi, an eGlobal Creative Publishing signed author.