Dark Humor Dad Jokes

Fay is a psychologist and her patient is the most ruthless mafia king. He's in jail. And he's the father of Fay's ex ?! One day, he caged Fay against bars and unbuttoned her shirt Fay tried to push him away but she was wet. Him："You know, doc. I wanted to do this the first day we met."

When my stepsister, Kate Lawrence, is poisoned at the full moon ceremony, my father, Jack Blackwood, condemns me at once, convinced that I am the one behind it. He clamps silver chains around me and drags me into the manor's dark underground cell. His eyes burn hatefully as he snarls, "You wretch! How could I have a daughter like you? Rot in here!" I drop to my knees on the cold floor and try to explain, but the sentence he throws over his shoulder as he turns away snuffs out the last of my hope. "Even if she dies in there, no one shall go in! Whoever lets her out will die with her!" The cell severs the mind-link completely, so no one hears me screaming. Seven days later, he finally remembers me, not knowing that I'd already died on the fourth day when the silver burned through to the bone.

During a road trip with my girlfriend, we accidentally collided with a limousine. Just as we were joking about having to pay an outrageous sum in compensation, the owner stepped out of the car. He greeted us warmly, asked if we were hurt, and even insisted we didn't need to pay a dime. But that simple gesture sparked a huge misunderstanding in my girlfriend's mind. At the proposal ceremony, she flat-out rejected me, ran to the restroom, and called her best friend to vent. "They're both Vanders, but Josh is a penniless loser, and Alexander is the richest man in the city! "The fortune teller said my true love's surname is Vander. If that's the case, why can't it be the richest man instead of Josh? "I looked it up. That car owner is Alexander. And he didn't even want me to pay for rear-ending him. He must have fallen in love with me at first sight! "In love, there's no such thing as first come, first served. I won't accept Josh's proposal. I'm going to marry the richest man!" A shiver ran through me. My years of devotion to her had moved only me. What she didn't know was that the 'richest man' she was dreaming of marrying wasn't anyone else—he was my father.

Synopsis – Billionaire’s Dark Veil In the glittering world of New York’s elite, Sophia Harper poses as Elena Rivers to bring down Damian Blackwood, the ruthless billionaire tied to a tragic orphanage fire. Haunted by lost memories and driven by a need for justice, Sophia infiltrates his world, only to find herself drawn to the very man she planned to destroy. Damian, feared and mysterious, awakens something deep within her. As sparks fly and truths unravel, Sophia discovers they share a hidden past, one she’s long forgotten. But others are playing a far more dangerous game. Claire Reynolds, her trusted friend, harbors jealousy and secrets that lead to a brutal betrayal, tearing Sophia and Damian apart. With enemies closing in and buried truths rising, Sophia must decide: expose Damian or fight beside him. In a world of lies, power, and passion, love may be their only way out or their ultimate downfall.

The kingdom of Agartha, an advance civilization of hybrids, would open its gate-way to spread terror among the inhabitants of the surface earth. An apocalypse was bound to happen soon and one girl had been warned of that possibilities on her dreams where she met the frightening dark lord who claimed her as his bride. She can be humanities' downfall or salvation if she chose the right side to fight in the coming unforeseen war.

Lucas Blackwood ruthlessly destroyed me 5 years ago, and now I have risen from the ashes to destroy him in return. 5 years ago i was nothing but a naive, lovesick girl hopelessly devoted to Lucas Blackwood—the powerful, arrogant heir to the Blackwood Pack. My bond with Lucas undeniable, our passion feral and all-consuming. But when Lucas’s father demanded he choose power over love, Lucas shattered my heart with a brutal rejection in front of the pack and leaving me to fend for myself. Now, I am the Ice Queen of Manhattan’s corporate underworld, the formidable CEO of Carter & Co., a multi-billion-dollar empire built on intelligence, ambition, and pure spite. The woman Lucas left behind is gone, replaced by someone stronger, smarter, and far more dangerous. And now, I am coming for him. When someone mercilessly attacks Blackwood EnterprisesI am forced to confront the woman I thought I’d buried in my past, I find myself drawn into a twisted game of power and passion. My obsession with reclaiming her becomes as dark as my guilt over losing her. But this time, Selina isn’t interested in forgiveness—only revenge. What Lucas doesn’t know is that Selina holds a secret that will shatter his world. And as their brutal war escalates, the line between hatred and desire blurs until neither can tell if they’re trying to destroy each other… or devour each other whole.

Si Ava Miller isang probinsyana may angking ganda matangos ang ilong na nakuha niya sa namayapa niya amang, malamlam na mata na kulay berde, ang namumula nito labi na malambot na kay sarap dampian ng halik at hubog na pangangatawan na nakuha niya sa ina na. Lumuwas siya sa syudad para makamit ang pangarap. Pero hindi iyon naging madali sa baguhan katulad niya, kaya labag sa kagustuhan naibigay niya ang sarili sa hindi karapatdapat na tao para lang matupad niya ang pangarap. Pero nabago ang pananaw niya nang makilala niya si TG. Naging kontento na sakanila buhay pero kung kailan masaya na sila atsaka nalaman ng lalaki ang lihim niya. "Nakakadiri ka! Ava." Mas nadurog pa siya nag-itanggi ng lalaki ang dinadala niya bata sa sinapupunan niya at ang masakit pa doon lumipad pa ito ng bansa after a week. Nang maglaon pinagpatuloy niya ang buhay nila ng anak niya sa sinapupunan. Pero kung kailan mapayapa na silang namumuhay atsaka ito magpapakita. Hindi naging madali makasama ito bilang boss niya, pinag-iinitan siya nito sa trabaho. Isang araw nakita siya nito kasama ang ina na kasama ang anak nila. "Is that my son?" "So your claiming him now." Hindi siya pinagbigyan ni Ava para maging ama sa anak nila. Pero ilang araw niya pa lang hindi nakakasalamuha ang lalaki tila hinahanaphanap niya ito. Nababaliw na siguro siya dahil pinalangin niya kahit galit ito sakanya basta nakikita niya ito araw araw. Nang malaman niya ang kinaroroonan ng lalaki kaagad niyang pinuntahan. Handa na tanggapin ito ng buo pero ang lalaki ang gusto lumayo para sa ikabubuti ng lahat, hindi na ito napigilan ng babae. After two years nagkita sila sa anibersaryo ng magulang ng lalaki doon inalok siya ng kasal ni Ava na tinaggap niya kaagad. "Daddy did you propose to mommy?"

Eve was the most hated child of the family. She was always treated as a slave in her own house. She was being punished for the mistake she had never made.Her mother made that mistake but in return, she had always hated Eve. Not just that, she had tried to kill Eve many times but every time she survived. Her brothers also hated her as well. Then one day they decided to punish her the worst way. They decided to sell Eve to their Master. The vampire who is known as the boogie man for all the children and demon for the adults. Everyone feared him. Will this be an opportunity for Eve or will her life be worse than death?

Wisps of smoke escaped his fine lips. “Spread your legs.” The rod of his cane felt cold against my skin. I shivered, my lips frozen under the weight of his blazing gaze. “Obey! Sweetheart.” He roared, and I parted the guards of my secret alley for him. Serving him the best appetite for tonight. ……. One day while she was rushing to bakery to get a cake with customised apology on it to patch up with her boyfriend. Bella hit into a man, with steely blue eyes, showing no affection but fear. She didn’t hesitate to grab him by the collar and make him pay. Her confidence crushed when reality struck her hard in the privacy of his room. And the random man he hit into turned out to the dad of her ex. Yet it was too late to save her fate.

“Next time I see you, I’m not letting you walk away.” The stranger said as Nova wiped his cum off her lips. Nova was a quiet, shy, and bookish girl… also very innocent. At least, that’s what everyone thought. Until one filthy game of truth or dare in an exclusive club stripped away her innocence and left her kneeling in the dark… mouth full of a stranger’s thick cock, swallowing every drop of his release without ever knowing his name. She fled after he finished. But he didn’t forget and neither did she. And the next day, when she followed her best friend to her father’s luxurious estate for his 45th birthday dinner, she locked eyes with the last man she expected to see— The man she gave head to the night before. Her best friend’s dad. Now he knows. Now he wants her. And Nova’s filthy little secret? She wants him too.