Food Jokes Novels & Stories

Campus food deliveries vanished so often that no one even commented anymore. Then it happened to me again and again. I never identified the thief, but by New Year's Eve I was finished with being an easy mark. I set out a bowl of soup as bait and soaked it with water wrung from an old bathroom mop. I meant to make whoever stole it regret touching my food. A week later, the police did not come for the thief. They came for me. The counselor slid a penalty notice across his desk—600 dollars for food costs and medical fees, due next week. The person who ate my food had been hospitalized for "poisoning." The school was already discussing a major demerit, the cancellation of my first-class scholarship, and the loss of my needs-based stipend. That stipend was the money keeping my sick mother alive. They planned to pin everything on me, shield the real culprit, and bury me under paperwork. Unfortunately for them, they chose the wrong target. I was the law department's resident argument addict, and I intended to turn their dirty little mediation into a public collapse.

Life was like a long thread, and the knot in it was a new beginning. Three lives. Three stories. But one shared fate. Ethan Lopez's life unraveled when he was accused of murdering Kaylee Anderson. On the day he was inaugurated as the CEO of Lopez Food Company, the murder occurred in Dylan Gabriel's penthouse, The Opulent Height. As the police continued their investigation, Ethan found himself targeted again, this time for kidnapping. This marked the beginning of the downfall of Lopez Food Company, benefiting their rival, Delish Delight Company. All evidence and leads pointed to Ethan until a new name emerged in the case: Blair Anderson, a seemingly ordinary baker at Lopez Food Company. Disclamer: R18+ This story may contain strong language, expletives, and mature content for adult readers, including themes of violence. It is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to real persons, businesses, places, or events is coincidental. This story is not intended to offend or defame any individual, entity, caste, community, race, religion, or to denigrate any institution or person, living or dead. Readers discretion is advised.

Clever has never thought he would end up like this: bathe and fed by a man who calls him Cutie, for Moon Goddess's sake,he is an Alpha! "How can I flee the horrible place? Seems no way! Er--" mumbling, he is being caressed by the man and here comes the food he hates most. "No more pet food!" What will an Alpha do when he has to stay in his wolf form and is mistaken a husky? "Come on, you little Cutie I'm sorry." "Don't call me Cutie." A man suddenly appears,saying so.

Once in a while, in the middle of life, love gives us a fairytale.And some fairytale love stories are completely unexpected and thus more memorable.No one expected the class president and the leader of Trouble Triggers to even talk about anything but notes and pencils. But then fate's a bitch and loves to meddle!Their life changes drastically when the good girl- Joanna Williams has to tutor the bad boy- Bryan Cooper.Along with the tutoring comes constant fun, too much bickering, lame jokes, scary sarcasm, idiotic friends, too many unknown emotions, jungles in tummy, bucket lists, unheard secrets and haunting pasts.Maybe some fairytales don't have a happy ending... or do they?

My wife has suffered from hereditary migraines for years. After three years of marriage, I finally developed a specialized medication just for her. Carrying a lunchbox, I headed to her company, intending to deliver the medicine to her in person. But her secretary mistook me for a kept man. He dumped the contents of the lunchbox over my head, stripped off my clothes in front of everyone, and even made me swallow the only dose of that specialized medicine. "A mere food delivery guy, and you dare dress so indecently? Today, I'll show you exactly what happens to a homewrecker." Then, with a smug grin, he turned to claim credit with my wife. "Ms. Milstein, I took care of that food delivery guy who was trying to seduce you. How are you going to reward me?"

I plan on ordering some food using my husband's phone, yet I've noticed a remark that's been saved on the delivery app. "The food is for a pregnant lady. Please make sure to be hygienic and use less oil and salt when making the dishes." I can feel my heart sink. I turn my gaze toward the bathroom, where my husband is. I can't figure out why my husband, who's been firm about not wanting a child, has been ordering meals for pregnant women. After a moment of hesitation, I scroll through the delivery app's order history with shaky hands. Numerous orders have been placed with the same restaurant, one that specializes in making exquisite dishes designed for pregnant women. Each of these food orders costs more than ten thousand dollars. My husband's company address has been chosen as the delivery address, and he's also the recipient. … After exiting the delivery app, I sit on the couch and stare into space. As I look at my husband's well-defined muscles, I recall how he, who's about to hit 40, is suddenly quite invested in getting in shape over the past year. I blurt out asking, "Have you been ordering food to your office often lately?" My husband freezes for a split second. Then, he fixes me with a gentle gaze. "I do that once in a while. Why are you suddenly asking about that? By the way, I haven't had the sweet and sour meatballs you make in a long while. Can you make some for me so that I can bring them to the office for my lunch tomorrow?" I smile at him and agree to his request. Still, I toss and turn in bed as the remark about the pregnant lady in his phone keeps gnawing at me that night.

The fascinating,chaotic story of a food obsessed girl who discovers startling new abilities within herself and is transported to the mystical land of Opa where she must save the land,control her hormones and try to not fall in love with her best friend.

After our father died, my sister and I inherited a fortune, a luxury villa, and a tiny convenience store. She took the money and the mansion without hesitation, leaving me with the old shop everyone looked down on. One month later, the apocalypse began. A zombie outbreak swept through the world overnight. The rich became trapped in their homes with no food, no power, and no way out. My sister, once proud of her mansion and millions, ended up starving behind locked gates. Meanwhile, I survived comfortably inside the convenience store I had rebuilt into a fortress, living off endless supplies of snacks, canned food, and soda. When my sister collapsed on the streets begging for help, I risked my life to save her. But greed was stronger than gratitude. After eating my food and recovering her strength, she waited until I fell asleep… then threw me outside to be torn apart by zombies. The moment I died, I opened my eyes again. I had returned to the day we divided the inheritance. This time, my sister smugly grabbed the convenience store first, convinced she had stolen the better deal. What she didn’t know was that I had been reborn too. And this time, I came back with a Apocalypse Survival System. While she fought over scraps, the villa she abandoned would become the safest shelter left in the world.

“I will never love you,” Anthony said with a determined look. However, the girl didn't care about his words. Regina still repaired a table full of beautiful dishes. Then, she took some food and put it in his mouth. His whole body relaxed and savored the satisfying sensation in his mouth. “I know. But can we enjoy the meal first? I have made your favorite food,” Regina blinked her moving eyes which made Anthony's heart a little unbearable. He gulped and sat down on the chair. “I love your food, not you,” Anthony began to take the meal while he was maintaining his harsh expression. Regina secretly smiled but she knew he wouldn't run away from her. ------------------------------------- Regina lived two human lives. In her first life, her family sold her to Anthony, the head of the Dominic mafia family. Regina and Anthony tormented each other until he accepted to let go of her hand. The good life was disrupted by the adultery and deception of her sister and her husband. Anthony was always waiting for Regina to return, but she ended up dying in his arms while taking the bullet for him. Reviving at the age of 17, Regina decided to change everything and accept being with Anthony. However, Anthony seemed to avoid Regina causing her to actively pursue him.