Funny Ironic Quotes Novels & Stories

Constant head splitting headaches, random joint pains,. dizziness and lightheadedness. it was symptoms I know just too well. The blue rose illness. The vile disease that robbed me of my mother. And now I think it's coming for my life too. My name is Ivy and I have the blue rose illness. Funny right? I can't believe I have less than thirty days to live. ************ Prince Emiliano "You are sick? Since when?" "I am sorry." "Keep that for later—I will never give you the permission to leave me. You can never leave me. Do you understand Ivy? Don't you dare."

Trace a.k.a The Orgy King. The Panty Ripper. His sworn brother called him funny names but he knows what he is. A spawn by Satan. Born to be his father's trouble. He fuck around like a rabbit. Party here and there. But his fave sport will always involve dark and bad. A walking sin. Trace will soon realize that karma really is a bitch*. Organization. Friendship. Brotherhood. Trace Dimagiba might be the most hateful man in FOEDUS CORP., but he’ll soon realize that even the devil himself deserves redemption. In the form of the feisty and beautiful woman who sauntered into his life– Chloe. His light and his end game.

Synopsis - On the night when the young warrior Raen is born, strange things happen in the Free East: A prince dies and the great oracle of Tulga sends a mysterious prophecy. A long journey begins. Will the young Raen manage to take the fate of his people in hand against the dark power of the priests and councilors? Raen's journey takes him to the legendary city of Borgossa, where he is to be trained at the War Academy. There he meets the funny Manoen, a compatriot, and they become friends. But Manoen also keeps a dark secret. When Raen finds out, the terrible machinations of the priests of his country are revealed to him. Together with his friend he returns to Hy to overthrow the priestly caste. War is inevitable.

Mom is always very strict with both my elder sisters, Esther and Emily Kingston. She always wakes them up at 5:00 am to make them study. And if they refuse to wake up, Mom will grab an embroidery needle and stab it into my arm. When fresh blood spills out, Esther and Emily will both get a fright and scramble to their desks at once to begin studying. Sometime during the year-end exam, Esther gets one easy question wrong, and I receive ten lashes with Mom's belt. Emily gets only the second-highest score in class, and I am forced to kneel on glass until my knees turn bloodied and torn. Esther and Emily feel sorry for me and fall to their knees, begging Mom to have mercy on me and promising that they will study hard and make her proud of them. Mom smiles happily and says that this teaching method works very well. However, after the SATs, Esther applies for a college out of state, and Emily tells Mom that she is eloping with a young man whom she has fallen in love with. Mom is so angry that she yanks me over and stuffs me into a huge fish tank before beginning to fill it up with water. She then takes a video of me, threatening to drown me alive if they don't listen to her and do exactly as she says. The water keeps rising in the tank. I feel scared, but I don't struggle because Mom always tells me that the only reason for my existence is to be made an example out of for Esther and Emily. She often quotes Shakespeare's "Othello", telling me about how I am the "sacrificial" dog one beats to scare a lion and teach it obedience. I think that I am considered quite a qualified dog after all, right?

This is the tale of how the sexist remark, "Men are scum," was delivered to me on a scalding plate! Guess what? It all started with a birthday surprise party for my boss's fiance, but I was slapped with horror when I saw my boyfriend of two years being kissed by my boss with an engagement ring around both their fingers. Turned out I had been the side chick for two bloody years! Funny enough, I wasn't served a heart break alone, my boss had also been toying with the emotions of Cole McPherson, and together we swore to take revenge. Would I still scream, "Men are slime!" at the conclusion, or will my beliefs alter in the process of seeking revenge alongside Cole?

They say memories stored in our brain could be sometimes forgotten, but then the heart does not forget. Because our heart always remember, the heart recognizes our beloved when our brain couldn't. Years after they lost contact with each other, Zhanaia encountered Dion again on the same place where they met. And funny how destiny works, they met again just like how they first met, accidentally bumping with each other. Zhanaia's heart was filled with joy, she couldn't contain her happiness and jumped to hug Dion, not wanting to let him go again. But all the hope in her shattered when Dion pulled away from her embrace and asked her, "I'm sorry, miss, but... who are you?"

Until recently, Carolina Lane has lived a normal life, but when she moves to this town, things change. Having Kayler Brown, the sexiest and most respected boy in school, as a neighbor is not funny at all. While Caroline is trying hard to make this bossy yet meddling boy stay out of her business, she receives death warnings: Attention, Carolina. The forest will be your new enemy. Do not approach Kayler, or otherwise, your death will be even more painful than I had planned. Who sent this letter? What is Kayler hiding behind? What's the secret of this town? Caroline desperately wants to figure out the truth. However, Kayler won’t answer the questions. He just takes her hand and gazes at her. “You are mine.” He said.

Out of her mundane life Ava sparked the interest of one of the celestial. Something she read from books and heard from stories but she chose to reject their existence. Will her personal vendetta cost her life or lead her to something better? A mere human who thought she was just caught in the crossfire among the gods. When in fact she was the root of it. 'Words are powerful because you wouldn't know who is listening, huh?' That's what she said on their first meeting. Still forcing herself not to believe even if the proof is right in front of her. His intent was to prove his innocence to her. Yet he entangled himself for a bigger mess, is it really? The mere spectator from before is now part of a dangerous game. His choices will determine not only his fate but of the two worlds and the entire humanity. The more he wanted to break free the more he gets drawn to her. An unexplained phenomenon he felt for the first time since he was created. 'You wouldn't know how it feels unless you go through the same ordeal.' He remembered what his friend told him and realized that he was eating his own words. He was willing to abandon everything just to be with her. Even if it meant being selfish for the first time. He is changing for the worse but can't let go of her now. Not when she already meant everything to him. When the hope of redemption seems impossible, a revelation is unleashed. More questions emerge instead of answers they needed. Will it become the cure or just another poison? What are they willing to sacrifice for their freedom and salvation? Do they even have that choice? Or would they cease to exist leaving no traces behind?

“I, Arnold Allirick, reject Daisy as my mate.” He was determined and he was not going to change this at all. He made his decision and he was not going to change his decision at any cost. Her mate rejected her only because she was naive and never learnt using her powers. Being brought up by a human couple, she embraced only human life. It was none of his fault, but Arnold, who was the next Alpha, wanted a mate who was fit to be the next Luna. Without helping Daisy, he rejected her outright. Just because his father wanted it. His father's wish was to have a daughter-in-law who would be as intelligent and wonderful as his wife, and not as naive as Daisy. After breaking up with this rejection, Daisy no longer wanted to move forward. Her wish was to live like a common human and this was the reason why she accepted Arnold's rejection. But the reason for which she let Arnold go, the same reason now seemed useless to her. Daisy agrees to resume her life following the command of the wolf inside her, but the Moon Goddess might not have wanted that. Moon Goddess had to pay for what happened to Daisy, and maybe that's why Ahaz came into her life. Daisy starts liking him even though she does not want to, but the problem was that Ahaz was a Vampire Prince. Will Daisy now be able to take the risk of falling in love with Ahaz after knowing his secret?

Zane is a werewolf and his planet was destroyed by vampires. His mother sent him to Earth, the planet of humans, just before their planet was destroyed. Zane was a young werewolf and he didn't know how to survive on his own, in a planet of humans, but then, he found an orphanage and his life changes