Funny Jokes Tagalog Quotes

"You look tired and lazy. I think you're suffering from lack of vitamin me?" ~X~ Three words are enough to describe the playboy billionaire Alexis 'X' Montemayor who owns the very successful Club inside and outside the country. Hot. Dangerous. And oozing with sex appeal. He believed that he would never find the right woman for him despite having a random geisha in his very own Club-V. Not until a woman named Minzireth Paje entered his room and asked him if she is hired or not in the middle of what he called 'play time'. Lured by her sexy smile; piercing golden brown eyes; and voluptuous body, he hired her as his sex-retary. ***** Minzireth Paje is not your typical woman. Nagtungo sa siyudad upang maghanap ng trabahong makapag-aahon sa kanila sa kahirapan at matustusan ang gamutan ng kanyang magulang na may sakit. Ngunit nagbago ang lahat ng matanggap siya bilang sekretarya ng nagmamay-ari ng isa sa pinakasikat na Club sa Pilipinas. Buong akala niya'y more on paper works; answering calls; at tamang tayo lang sa gilid ng conference room ang kanyang gagawin. Not until her playboy boss, Alexis Montemayor demands her to do her assigned job. And that was to spice his night as his sex-retary. What if she found out what was her playboy boss's dark secret? Would she be able to fulfill her duty? Or resigned, and accept the fact that she is not qualified enough to be one of his sex-retary?

Ketika kasih berlabuh pada orang yang salah. Memendam dan mengungkapkan akan menjadi opsi mutlak yang harus dipilih. Gadis polos yang tergila-gila akan sepak Bola. Nascherly Aurora Oshi, itulah namanya. Ia adalah gadis bar-bar yang akan bertransformasi menjadi gadis manja jika bersama Bian. Lyshi hanya gadis biasa yang diliputi keberuntungan. Beruntung karena bisa bersahabat dengan Bian Putra Mahadewa. Lelaki sedingin es dan sehangat pelukan jika bersama Lyshi. Dua insan berbeda gender yang menjalin hubungan persahabatan, istilah klisenya friendshit. Tapi, bukankan hubungan friendshit selalu berakhir sama? Mari kita lihat akhir dari hubungan Lyshi dan Bian. Akankah berakhir bahagia? Atau malah sebaliknya. "Bian! Tungguin Lyshi!" gadis itu berlari mengejar lelaki di depannya dengan napas terengah-engah. Bian berhenti, kemudian menoleh ke arah Lyshi. Melihat itu Lyshi langsung berlari dan mencengkeram seragam bagian belakang Bian. "Bian! Kamu tuh jahat banget, masa nyuekin Lyshi terus dari tadi. Dasar manusia jahat!" cerocos gadis berambut panjang itu. Tangan Bian terulur menghapus bulir keringat di dahi Lyshi. "Udah ngomelnya?" Lyshi mendengus kesal. "Belum. Lyshi nggak akan berhenti ngomel sebelum Bian nurutin permintaan Lyshi," ujarnya bergebu-gebu. "Kamu mau apa? Yakult? Novel? Baju? Bakso mercon? Kucing?" tanya Bian menyebutkan hal-hal yang disukai Lyshi. "Nggak. Lyshi nggak mau itu." Dahi Bian berkerut, "Terus maunya apa?" Lyshi menatap maniak hitam Bian dengan serius. "Lyshi cuma minta Bian selalu ada buat Lyshi. Bian nggak boleh pergi ninggalin Lyshi apapun yang terjadi," tuturnya mengangkat jari kelingking. Bian meneguk ludah kasar melihat raut keseriusan di mata Lyshi. "Siap!" timpal Bian mengangkat jari kelingkingnya, lalu menautkan dengan kelingking milik Lyshi. "Tapi aku nggak bisa janji, Ly. Aku takut kamu yang akan pergi ninggalin aku setelah kamu tau semuanya," batin Bian

How I loved to piss her off! For some reason, it only aroused me even more, and, most importantly, her too. Parents always said that meeting your mate is a gift from heaven. Only no one warned that it could become a drug for me. And I certainly didn’t expect that the girl would perceive our connection in a completely different way, and if I strive to be closer, then she only tries to run away from me. Silly, you can't run away from the wolf, he will catch up sooner or later anyway... well, that's even more interesting. Hunting has always been one of my favorite pastimes.

In a world of hidden pasts and intricate fates, Alice meets someone on a flight..Alexander, a mysterious stranger with a dark, alluring presence... they instantly felt a strong attraction to each other. Although their first meeting seemed purely by coincidence, they soon discover an uncanny truth: they were Already engaged to each other by their families, and their paths were always meant to intertwine. As Alice moves to the Alex's mansion to honor this arrangement, she unearths secrets about him that bind them even deeper than family obligations. Raised by a mafia boss yet now reunited with his real parents, Alex carries scars from a life spent on the edges of crime and loyalty. Unbeknownst to Alice, his family holds the key to a traumatic incident in her past—her mother's tragic murder. Through twists of fate, betrayal, and hidden affections, Alice and Alex find themselves caught in a dance of desire and danger. As their connection grows, so does the revelation of a shared, tragic history that binds them far beyond any contract. But will the truth of Alex’s family and the buried sins of the past be too much to overcome, or will it be the final key that brings them together in a love worth fighting for? In this journey of love, redemption, and the unraveling of painful secrets, Alice and Alex will be forced to confront their own darkness to find the light they never knew they needed.

Skylar Lindse finds herself contending with more than was in the job description when she accepted the temp position at Banscroft Empires after it's CEO, James Banscroft himself, offers her an exceptional bonus on top of her temp wage to stand in as his girlfriend to get his family off his back. Fending off his mother's setups at every turn, James hopes bringing Skylar in will put a more long-term stop to the awful blind dates, but he finds himself unprepared for how permanent he'd like this temp to be.

Luka was the best Alpha the Brightwater Pack ever had. That is, until he loses his mate and everything comes crashing down. Having lost everything he loved and his one real reason for living, he attempts suicide on a human territory, when Victoria intervenes and ruin his plans. She makes it her duty to help the man that 'couldn't be saved', after he constantly refuses her help. What happens when she uncovers his secrets one by one? Will Victoria give up on him, or will she surprise them both? Who would've thought that she could save him just in the nick of time? Or does she....

What happens when a billionaire CEO goes to college? Faith is about to find out. Utterly and completely broke, Faith is forced to work three different jobs to support herself through college. Unlike her counterparts, Faith failed to get the good fortune of being born into a rich family. God's attempt to make it up to her must have been giving her a super sharp brain which is the only reason why she could attend the prestigious Barbell University on a half scholarship. But, with the remaining half of her tuition going into $35,000, Faith is forced to slave away night and day at her part-time jobs while simultaneously attending classes, completing assignments, taking tests and writing exams. Faith would do anything--literally anything, to get some respite, including taking on the job of tutoring a famously arrogant, former-dropout, self-made billionaire CEO of a tech company for a tidy sum. Devlin has returned to college after five years to get the certificate he desperately needs to close an important business deal. Weighed down by memories of the past, Devlin finds himself struggling to move ahead. Can Faith teach this arrogant CEO something more than Calculus and Algebra? Will he be able to let go of the past and reach for something new?

Kaitlyn Randall wakes up late and the first thing she does leaving her place, is almost throw her cold coffee on a cop car nearby with a handsome officer inside. To say the least, her day isn't going very well except for the eye candy. Especially when she shows up to work extremely late and has to clear out her desk. When she finds out later that her estranged father left her millions of dollars, she decides to go to Europe and take a well earned vacation after quickly buying a house. Once she is there, she realizes that it was all an elaborate scheme and now she is stuck in Europe by herself, without a single dollar to her name. Will a tall, dark and handsome stranger come to her rescue? Or more importantly, what will he want in exchange? See what this rich stranger has in store for her in A Day To Remember.

"Why are you angry?" I asked him. "It's not like we're a couple." He stopped, and stared at me, boring my eyes with his emerald eyes. "If we are…" He paused, clenching his jaw, "then am I allowed to be angry?” I looked at him like he was insane. “Then we'll take it to that level." He continued. "I'm serious. I want you.” Leizel Snow Garcia Waterstrings is not just fierce. She's more than that. Ending up as an ice cream worker in a local ice cream shop, it was her one step of becoming a strong and independent woman. And that's when a cold-hearted stranger came in view. Eion Aurelio Hudson. Out of seven billion people in the world, the two hard-headed people crossed paths, making her "strong and independent woman" facade slowly fall apart. With all the dramas, free food, forgotten birthdays, Robot handling, idiots around, and emotional crisis, will she be able to melt his winter heart with her blazing fire or will this fire be put away instantly? ``` ``` One Blazing Head. One Winter Heart. Two Hard-headed people. A huge disaster. (Book 1 of Hearts Series but can be read as standalone)

Algara Dwi Renaldo, cowok berparas tampan dan menawan. Namun memilik tatapan yang tajam seperti silet. Sikap cuek dan juteknya membuat Aletta Vanesya Unila gemas. Bukan menghindarinya malah semakin lengket. Tapi Algara tidak pernah memperdulikan Aletta, sedikitpun tidak akan membalaskan cinta kepada Aletta. Algara akan tetap membenci cewek itu, karena dia lah yang membuat Algara terkekang. Tidak bisa bebas. Selalu saja Aletta menganggunya, mengusiknya. Namun, ketika Aletta pergi jauh dari Algara, membuat cowok itu merasa kesepian, ada yang aneh dalam dirinya. Seharusnya ia happy karena pengrusuh sudah lenyap dari pandangannya. Setelah mengetahui apa yang terjadi pada Aletta, Algara benar-benar menyesalinya. Bagaimana ceritanya? Ayok baca