Funny Sexual Jokes

the story futures a girl who is diagnosed. A nymphomaniac. for a sec she didn't even know what was until she was told the meaning.(a woman with uncontrollable or excessive sexual desire.) she's still in college. she does different sexually insane stuff in school. she's on her journey to self Liberation. Now with the help of the doctor our male protagonist, she is supposed to find a cure. But guess what? now she is obsessed over him

*Abandoning ship isn’t my style. It wasn’t hers either, but our circumstances ripped us apart. Now it’s not just a literal ocean standing between us. Francine Chirilova has no direction. After coming out of the closet leaves her without a family at age 18, the quick witted 25 year old has been forced to survive on her connections and kind personality. Throw in a rapidly decreasing appetite and a tendency to gravitate toward abusive women for a epic shit show. While recovering from her latest 4 year long mistake, she makes a strong, yet unlikely connection with her virtual best friend. Que in recovering alcoholic Vasilisa Krovopuskova, aged 26 from Siberia, Russia. After surviving a grueling upbringing on her own, trust is a difficult concept to grasp. Already having experienced heartbreak once before, she wasn’t looking for anything serious when Francine crash landed into her life via an online sanctuary for lesbians. With an ocean separating the two, neither Francine nor Vasilisa know which direction to swim in. Will they stay on their side of the world, or drown trying to get to the other? *Disclaimer* - Strong mature content. 18+, please Book one. To follow is book two: “Our Blank Canvas.”

Year Malkame returns to her hometown after ten years of exile. She came back following pieces of a puzzle she really needed to find in order to meet her Secret santa, the man or woman who had been gifting her lonely childhood Christmases with joy and music. Being sent away from her home at the age of fourteen, she had lost the trail of the person she was looking for. But now, she wants to finally find him. But in her journey, she finds her childhood best friend Justin. A misfortune leaves her under the same roof with this man. What happens when long-time friends come together after ten years? What happens when she realizes who her secret santa is? And what the hell happens when a billionaire decides he suddenly wants her to not only work for him but also be his woman?

Since the day Serenity got hitched to a stranger on their blind date, she had assumed married life would be ordinary but respectful and mundane. It never crossed her mind that her new husband would be clingy like a piece of gum stuck to the bottom of a shoe. To her utmost surprise, he could make her troubles disappear whenever she was in a fix. Despite her questioning, her husband would always pass it off as luck. Until one day, she watched an interview with a local billionaire known for fussing over his wife. That was when she noticed the uncanny resemblance of the billionaire to her husband. The wife whom he was showering attention on turned out to be her!

Rosalie Jacobs had been married to Byron Lawrence for three years before finally getting a divorce. The entirety of Coast City frowned upon her as the outcast wife of a rich family.Six years later, Rosalie returned to the country with a pair of twins and became a world renowned miracle doctor.Countless people flocked to marry her.Suitor No. 1 said, "Miss Jacobs, are your children missing a father? What do you think of me? If you agree, I will treat them like my own."Suitor No. 2, "Miracle doctor Jacobs, I was blown away by your beauty and talent when I first met you. I would like the chance to love you to the best of my ability for the rest of my life. President Lawrence is blind to turn his back on you. I would never leave you!"Just then, a little girl appeared. She hugged Rosalie's leg and said, "Mommy, daddy has been kneeling on the washboard for three days and three nights now. He asked if you’d calmed down yet. If you have, he wants to go to the Civil Affairs Bureau to get remarried."

Despite being single, Molly May had become pregnant without her knowing how six years ago. As a result, she fell into disrepute and got abandoned by her family.Six years later, she returned with her triplets: Alex, Ben, and Claudia. The triplets with high IQ found that Sean Anderson was their biological father. Hence, they went to meet him without telling their mother.However, the CEO refused to recognize his offspring. “I have lived chastely and never had physical contact with a woman.”“DNA doesn’t lie, and that’s a fact,” said Alex, the eldest of the bunch.“People say men will forget what they've done after pulling on pants. It seems to be true,” said Ben, the middle child.“You should be happy and grateful to have three adorable kids and a beautiful wife,” said Claudia, the youngest of the bunch.While Sean played the role of a father and his relationship with the triplets grew rapidly, he was estranged from his wife.So the triplets taught him tips and tricks to pursue women: making bold moves, stealing kisses, proposing, etc.Nevertheless, Molly was distraught by his moves. “Such flirting skills befit an experienced male escort.”When Sean's identity was finally revealed, he retorted, “You are the 'escort.' Your entire family are 'escorts!'”

WARNING: THIS BOOK MAY CONTAIN STEAMY AND SEXUAL CONTENT WHICH IS STRICTLY NOT FOR KIDS UNDER +18 . "Bryce!". I screamed as I feel his huge cap nudge at the entrance of my womanhood. He groaned as he pressed in deeper before he slides into my wet entrance. My walls clenched around him while he stretched my inner muscles as he kept pushing deep inside me. "Please". I cried and placed the tip of my finger down at his waist in an effort to push myself away from him. "Please". I begged but he only retracted his hip and thrusted into me fully, deeper, stretching me wide enough to accommodate his full length. . He is the handsome, sexy and heartless devil. The sinner. She is the purest, innocent and beautiful angel. Two polar opposites, one single attraction. *** Having lived in the convent all her life, Hera Whitson manages to secure a job as a maid in the household of Bryce Donovan. The inhuman sex god that has the entire female population at his feet. He lives for sex, he celebrates and relish the electricity of it with every fibre of his being and sees no better reason for being alive. One look at Hera and Bryce is smitten. She is like an addictive drug, a moth to a flame and he will do anything to get burned by her. Relinquished by her heat. What happens when Hera finds herself battling against her principles and sexual attraction for Bryce? Will she be caught in the web of Bryce's twisted game of lust?

SIX-PACK SERIES BOOK THREE *While this book can be read as a standalone, I'd highly recommend reading books one (Alpha Gray) and two (Alpha Theo) for context before this book* JAX : I'm no stranger to one night stands. Lots of girls want a hook-up with an alpha, so why should this one be any different? Maybe it's because she's the best I ever had. Maybe it's because she refused to tell me anything about herself. We agreed to one night, no strings attached. The problem is, I can't get that night out of my head; I've been obsessed with finding this girl since. When she shows up at the squad complex for training, I feel like it's my lucky day- until my best friend introduces her as his sister and things get... complicated. I can't go against bro code, right? Even if Quinn is my dream girl. Even if there's a crazy attraction between us that's harder to resist every day. I'm so screwed.  ~ QUINN : One night. It was supposed to be one night of anonymous, meaningless with a stranger. I just wanted to have a good time and forget about my cheating ex. It definitely did the trick- I haven't thought about my ex since, but now I can't stop thinking about that night or the sexy stranger who had all the right moves. When I arrive at the complex for a fresh start, I'm shocked to see him again- and even more surprised to find out that he's not only an alpha, but also one of my brother's best friends. Theo would Jax if he found out about that night. He can never know- which means I have to keep my distance. Even if I can't stop fantasizing about Jax. Even if it kills me.

Meet Skyler Jackson. She is the Alpha's 17-year-old nearly 18-year-old daughter, but is also the pack slave and the Alpha's punching bag. She dreamed of a mate when she was younger but doesn't believe, anymore. Meet the Mason brothers: Cole, Elijah, and Nathan. They are the Alphas of the most feared pack in the country. They are said to be ruthless and cruel to whoever crosses them, but they will also protect packs and loved ones with their lives. What will happen when Skyler meets these three brothers? What will happen when one commits the ultimate betrayal? Will she be able to forgive? Will his brothers? What will be in Skyler's future? *** Warning read at your own discretion as this story may trigger some readers as it contains physical and sexual abuse, violence and mature scenes. Please read at own discretion!

Warnings: This book may contain some violence, explicit and matured content and BDSM! I know what you're thinking this sounds like a dirty, filthy book filled with fantasy smut stories. Unveiling the Tapestry of Pleasure in this novel takes readers on an eclectic journey through the diverse sexual landscapes of various characters. Each chapter unfolds a unique narrative, exploring the intricacies of desire, intimacy, and self-discovery. From clandestine affairs to unconventional relationships, the novel weaves together a mosaic of human experiences, challenging preconceptions and celebrating the multifaceted nature of sexuality. As characters navigate their desires, the story invites readers to reflect on their own perspectives, fostering a nuanced exploration of the spectrum of human connection. This novel is hot and heavy full of insta-love and lust at its finest, with dominant alpha heros completely obsessed with claiming his/her untouched heroine. So if you’re searching for a hot, filthy, dirty ,wild sex fantasies novel then you’ve gotten one. For example maybe a story that entails: A hot professor, with his horny student! Or a romance between: A hot neighbor ready to be fucked by her long time neighbor crush! Or something fifty shades of grey alike: A Dominant his Submissive. This book is rated 18..... If you can handle the heat, well join the ride because things are going to get messy while reading.