Funny Sexual Jokes

Away from humans, in a forest like no other, werewolves live. A powerful race with magical gifts and the ability to shapeshift into full-blooded wolves. Wyatt is an Alpha and the leader of the most powerful pack in the world, and his life goal has always been to be fair to the members of his pack and live a peaceful life with his mate, his life partner, and the person who will give him a reason to fight for what he wants. However, Olivia took several centuries to come into his life and when the moon goddess finally wanted to unite their souls, the task was complicated for the Alpha since Olivia is not a woman yet and at the moment they meet, she is a girl, but she will grow up and as this happens, Wyatt will be taking care of her, protecting her and waiting for her coming of age when they can finally be together. Disclaimer: This story has no sexual content until the characters are of legal age.

Falling for the man who is paying you for sex is a dangerous business. Stella Kaye Wyatt is running from an abusive past she'd like to forget. She secures a new identity by working at a brothel to stay hidden. When her once knight-in-shining armor boyfriend becomes what she escaped, she feels responsible for trying to save him at a high cost to herself. Alaric John Carter is an adventure seeker who uses adrenaline highs to forget his own troubled past. When his life crosses paths with Stella's and he's informed of her sexual job, he takes advantage as a paying customer with surprisingly deep pockets. Despite strictly being a business arrangement, real feelings begin to develop between the two. Stella begins to dream of a better life, but will handsome Alaric accept her for who she truly is when he learns the dark truth she's hiding? As Stella's past returns to reclaim her and Alaric's secrets are revealed, the truth will potentially end not only their feelings for each other, but their lives.

(A/N: Hello sweety, I want to inform you and assure you that this book is certainly the erotica book you are looking for. This book is all about the thrilling sex life of a youngster, which is very erotic, steamy, and has a touch of dark relationship and dark romance (BDSM). (Do enjoy reading!) Snow POV I stare at the naked figure besides me in amusement. I still can't believe that this man is the one making me moan crazily like a mad woman. His dirty words, his touch, the things he does to me, and the things he makes me do, felt really crazy but enjoyable. My life has become engulfed by him, making me madly obsessed and addicted to him. If I don't see him, I will feel uncomfortable and sad. He has become a vital part of my life, my breath, and everything! He makes me feel so good; he makes me feel like a real woman. He is the only one who can send me to hell in heaven and drag me back. The rate at which he handles my body when it tangles in his, the sexual chemistry, the burning pleasurable desire, and the way my body writhes in his addictive touch make me go lustfully crazy. I don't know if such feelings ever existed before! My mother never mentioned this to me; she even barely spared time to teach me sex education. But here I am, having a bonus, a premium of the real thing, and the unfortunate part is that he is my coach! A 30-year-old married man! While I'm just a 19-year-old trainee of his!

Amaya and Max are two young CEOs from different countries that are both afraid of committing to an intimate relationship because they were being tied up to their work. Though among their hectic schedule their thirst for sexual intercourse was never gone and their selfish desires would keep hurting the people around them. Amaya as a strong independent businesswoman in this world was having trouble controlling herself when it comes to sex while trying to keep it peaceful in her side of the business world. While Max is living in a competitive world wanting no one to overrule him who has nothing but his business. Yet meeting Amaya at a University in Canada was something he wasn't pleased with because of her Max's pride was triggered and wants to bring her down. Though how far will he be able to drag her combining his prideful personality yet can't resist the temptation of mating? Will it be just sex or will they fall in love and take the risks?

Simple, Smart, Sexy and Serene? then I must have you. Oh, you don’t date playboys? tough luck. Funny how I’ve been commanded to stay away from you but where’s the fun in that? If you think you can walk away from me, think again. You think dating someone else will deter me? watch me strategically deal with him so he wouldn’t dare touch you again. In fact, I will publicly claim you so that no sane man will dare to ever want you. I see you love your family and village so much, now I love them too, I might as well take them over. It’s not possession, I’m just crazy about you. Dream big baby, be the scientist you want to be. I will even build a research lab for you right here, now you have no reason to ever leave my side. It really hurts that you thought you were never going marry me, I might have omitted to tell you that we’ve been married for almost three years now and I don’t do divorce. Oh, don’t rely much on that contraceptive injection you’ve been taking because when I want an heir, I get an heir. You can be stubborn and rebellious, I find it cute but don’t go too far because you see that house and that village you love so much, you will have to watch it burn to the ashes. I am S’bu, the CEO of JC and the heir to the Jobe empire. I want you to be completely mine, who are you to go against me?

Lucy and Axel had plans to travel after they graduated high school. Two orphaned werewolves with no pack to show them who they are. When Axel’s twin sister comes looking for him their plans blow up. After everything they’ve gone through in their lives. Who can they trust and when should they fight.

I found out I was pregnant in the middle of a fight with my husband. How should I tell him without embarrassing myself too much? I decided to ask the Internet, and the netizens gave me a ton of advice based on their years of experience reading novels. One, run away with your unborn baby. Two, pretend to gag over lunch. Three, put his number into the abortion registration form… When he came to me in a frenzy, I belatedly realized, ‘Crap, I think I went too far!’

Life has a funny way of throwing curveballs, and for Ella Blake, it was a fastball right to the heart. On the same day she discovered she was pregnant, her husband, Lucas, dropped a bombshell: his childhood sweetheart, Amy, was also expecting—and he wanted Ella to raise the child. Talk about a double whammy! Devastated and feeling utterly betrayed, Ella packed her bags and left the life she once knew, vowing never to look back. Fast forward six years, and she's back, but with a new look and a fierce attitude. Lucas can’t believe his luck when he spots her, mistaking their chemistry for a chance to rekindle their past. But with secrets, old feelings, and Amy reappearing with her own bombshell, can Ella find a way to reclaim her heart, or will revenge take the wheel? What will happen when the past collides with the present?

Heiress Jovie Wimberly has a stealing problem. She steals from stores, people, and even her parents. When she's sent to group therapy to get to the root of her issue, she doesn't count on stealing Reno's heart. Reno Valenzuela has a gambling problem. He's lost all his money to casinos, horse races and ridiculous bets. What he doesn't bet on is falling head over heels for Jovie. When Reno's debt catches up with him and Jovie decides to leave her fiance, they head on a cross country trip to save Reno's life. With hitmen and Jovie's fiancé after them, they embark on a crime-filled, life changing journey that might actually change them for the better. Will the hitmen get to Reno? Will Jovie's fiancé bring her back home? Should they have just stayed in group therapy?

The supernatural creatures of the world have long been governed by The Council, made of representatives of each faction: werewolves, vampires, witches, and fae. The Council’s main goals were to keep the existence of magic from humans and keep any one group from becoming too powerful. Legends of a creature, a hybrid capable of being more than one supernatural creature, have existed as long as the beings themselves. A hybrid would be able to topple The Council, and whichever faction they were loyal to would rule with ease. As such, the purposeful creation of such a creature was forbidden. In 2012, ancient vampire Elias Elhassan found Claire Luna. After years of living in and out of the oncology ward, the 26-year-old was ready for death. Until he approached her and offered her a way to live without the constant pain she had become so accustomed to. 24-year-old Colin Lucin, the youngest, bastard son of the Alpha of the Half-Moon pack, did not want much from life. After a childhood filled with loss and pain, he was more than satisfied to be the pack’s nurse and stay out of the way of his father and eldest brothers. But in order to maintain a long-held pact with a local coven, once every generation, a witch is destined to mate with a wolf of the Alpha line. Thrown into a political battle that neither knows anything about, Claire and Colin are forced to navigate a centuries-old web of lies, torture, and manipulation. Though they are fated to be together, can they trust each other’s words? Can they even survive long enough to find out? Trigger warnings: Depictions of: violence, blood, language, sexual content (to what degree is yet to be decided) Implied: abuse, sexual content