Funny Text Messages Novels & Stories

My sister-in-law, Cynthia Ziegler, has my name written on her cancer diagnosis report. As such, the entire Ziegler family assumes that I'm the one with cancer. Overnight, my husband, Leonard Ziegler, sends a text message to his mistress, Irene Ludlow. "Our time will soon come! That old bat is about to die at last, so I'll finally be able to marry you!" My grandmother, Amanda Powell, cries and clings onto my hand, begging me not to seek treatment. She is not only discussing with Leonard on how best to split my insurance money after my death but also employing various methods to hasten my death. However, they are all unaware that Cynthia used my medical insurance card when she went for her physical examination. I feign sadness and nod with tears in my eyes. "I won't seek treatment, Mom. Let's not seek treatment no matter who is diagnosed with cancer."

I had just climbed into the armored SUV leaving the Moretti estate when the gatekeeper hurried after me with a black encrypted phone in his hand. "Mrs. Westmore, Don Moretti asked me to give you this." I took it. One unread message glowed on the screen. [Selena only had a scare. I'll come home tomorrow. Don't overthink it.] I stared at it for two seconds, popped out the SIM card, snapped it in half, and tossed it into the rain outside the window. The next day, I had just reached the abandoned shipyard in North Harbor when encrypted messages started hitting my backup phone one after another. [Vivian, where are you?] [Why aren't you home? Where the hell did you go this late?] [Answer me. Don't make me send men all over the city looking for you.] The last one was exactly his style: soft on the surface, arrogant underneath. [Your family survives under my protection. Don't test my patience.] I didn't answer. After countless messages sank without a reply, my husband finally drove to the old Westmore grounds at North Harbor. He knew that if anything was left of my family, I would be there. But when Damon pushed through the broken iron gate, he found no guards, no household staff, and no Westmore men waiting for orders. The old house stood hollow in the rain. Its windows were blown out, the front steps were black with soot, and the air still carried the bitter smell of smoke and gunpowder. Damon grabbed a passing harbor guard by the sleeve. "Where are the Westmores?" The guard looked at him as if he should already know. "Gone. The family was hit two nights ago. Whoever came for them knew exactly when Moretti protection would be pulled from the harbor." "Miss Westmore came back before dawn," the guard added. "She took the black-gold signet, a few boxes of ledgers, and whatever papers survived the fire." "After that, she left. And no one has seen her since."

Zoey Blake swore off athletes the day she caught her hockey player boyfriend cheating with a cheerleader. She's done with games, on and off the ice, and plans to keep her distance from that world for good. But when her new tutoring assignment lands her with four players from her ex’s rival team, staying away gets complicated. They're nothing like she expected, frustrating, funny, and unexpectedly kind. And when they ask her to help with a plan to get back at her ex, she agrees, even if it means pretending to be part of their world again. What starts as a simple favour slowly blurs the lines Zoey worked hard to draw. The more time she spends with them, the harder it becomes to remember why she built those walls in the first place. She promised herself she’d never fall for another hockey player. She never imagined four of them might change her mind.

If these three months pass and I don't shed a single tear because of you, Chris... you will apologize to me and my family at the door of our home in my city, on both knees in our neighborhood! His eyes narrowed and shone intensely, only seconds until he came towards me and I was still leaning on the door, he stood right in front of me and raised my chin with his left hand.. He forced me to stare at him and said coldly: I apologize to you?? you ?! I have heard many jokes in my life..but a funny joke like this..I have never heard of it..this was what our agreement stipulated before I threw myself into his world, but events took another turn that I did not expect..who are you!! Which one of them would you be? What is the nature of your colorful world?! Rather, the most important.. What is my fault in all these intertwining and where fate takes me?

Siddharth Jindal is a young Dermatologist. He is everything a girl could want in her life partner... He is tall, dark, handsome, rich, funny, successful and has a very cool family. Girls are crazy about him but he is just friendly with everyone. Until one day when he goes to do some lighthearted friendly ragging of the freshers. Shruti Singh is a smart, confident and intelligent girl, who fights her family to make an identity of her own and becomes a doctor. She belongs to a conservative family where education for girls is not very important. They just want them to get married to a well-settled man. Siddharth likes her but she avoids him like plague due to some incident. He tries his level best to make her understand but she blocked him from her life. This keeps going on till his sister-in-law decides to play cupid. Read this book and find out how she brings them together.

Everyone cheered on the most handsome student in our elective class, Jack Anderson, to reveal his ideal type. “My future wife has to be at least five feet five inches tall, and her parents must be professors. She also has to be beautiful and a top student in her field…” While everyone cheered, I immediately looked up. Why did the description… sound like my girlfriend, Cindy Swift? The next second, the professor standing next to the podium, Liam Swift, immediately smiled obsequiously. “That’s great! If Cindy hears this, she’ll be very happy! “You should meet her so that she wouldn’t go overseas over some silly guy.” Our classmates were roaring with laughter. I lowered my eyes and stared at the text message my parents had sent me. [You rascal! Are you sure you want to accompany your girlfriend overseas? No one will take over our family business, then!]

My mate, Alpha Logan, was at the Sanctuary preparing to mark me when he was called away. “The mating doesn’t have to be on a full moon,” he said. “Something urgent has come up.” He left me alone in the sacred Sanctuary on the night of the full moon, all because his human friend, Lila, had been injured by a rogue wolf while hiking. A moment later, his text came through: [Lila needs a special serum. I have to get her to Canada within 48 hours. Let's reschedule the mating ceremony.] I’d lost count of how many times Logan had chosen Lila over me. But this time, I wasn’t going to get jealous, throw a fit, and ultimately cave like I always did. Because Logan has no idea that if we don't complete our mating bond by tomorrow, I'm going to die.

My health was not good, but I had always wanted a child. My husband, citing concern for my health, avoided intimacy with me for a year. Then I stumbled across his private messages with another woman. [You'll spend Valentine's Day with me, right? You're not going to touch her tonight, are you?] [You know I don't like doing it just to make babies. Got you some lingerie. Wear it for me tomorrow.] That ill-fitting lace lingerie he was talking about was on my body. I'd slipped it on while he was in the shower, thinking it was a Valentine's Day surprise from him. Turned out, he hadn't bought the wrong size. He had just sent it to the wrong address. I clicked on the woman's profile. Her latest video showed her at the beach, hand in hand with the person filming. I recognized her hand instantly. It belonged to my best friend.

comes Dove Callum: weird, always happy, wild, beautiful with blonde hair and blue eyes, president of the school body council, all A student and two mothers enters Liam Scott: loner, moody face, hot as hell, brown hair, green eyes, very tall and let's not forget a British accent .. The day callum sets her eyes on Liam for the first time, the only thing on her mind is love, love at first sight but Liam doesn't want anything to do with love or callum..

Cassandra is summoned by a magical owl, and she discovers that another world exists in the middle of Siberia, where monsters, faeries, elves, and sorcerei fight for domination. She soon becomes inextricably involved in the affairs of this 'other dimension' that lies behind a magical mirror, and everyone in that realm is at the mercy of the blue moon. But Cassandra has never expected to meet a sorceress quite like Princess Vasilisa, not to mention, she is an actual legendary Vasilisa the Wise from the fairytale she has read as a kid. Vasilisa is also a daughter of an evil sorcerer Czar, and whose plan is to overrule the human world and the magical world with the help of an all-powerful dark lord, Koschei, the Deathless. When the night of the solstice arrives, Cassandra's mortal realm and the magical one will collide. If she doesn't help Vasilisa find the Golden Wand and stop her greedy father before the winter solstice, both their lives and everyone else's will fall into an inevitable apocalypse.