Funny Threats Novels & Stories

"What if it's a threat?" Henry asked Melissa in return. "Well, it better not be, because I don't want to believe that you were threatening me because of that bitch," Melissa said to Henry, who immediately burst into a round of mockery laughter. "Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you, sweetheart, but that message was clearly a threat, and I meant everything I wrote in it," Henry said to Melissa after laughing to his satisfaction. "That's a joke, right?" Melissa asked Henry, not wanting to believe that he meant what he just said, even though he looked and sounded so serious while saying it.

Or a threat. ***

Making everyone scream in hysterics instantly. The music suddenly stopped. Replaced with uncontrollable chaos and screaming. Jack stopped his guitar playing. He came to the front of the stage and smiled horribly. Jack took out a knife from the pocket he had prepared earlier. He slit his own throat until blood gushed from his neck with an expressionless face.

Zuck suggested looking at me with an annoyed expression, he probably isn't used to waiting for someone. "No, I'm sure he's already on his way here that's why he doesn't answer my calls, let's just wait for a few minutes. Anyway, I hope you don't act like a fucking dickhead to Mason and Lautner, I don't want to go back in the Philippines with your corpse." I said trying to threaten Zuck but he didn't take it seriously and he just laughed at what I said. "That's the lamest joke I've ever heard, Ashton. You're talking to the son of a mafia, do you think I should be threatened?" Zuck replied laughing at me but I just scoff at him and kept my mouth shut.

“I received another threat last night from that person who made up that stupid article.” My eyes widened at the news. He then handed his phone to me so I can see the text message. Unknown message: I see you’ve found an early solution to my threat. Let’s see if that will last once I reveal the photo in public within twenty four hours. And he even called him a homophobic slur after that! My eyes widened, absolutely horrified by the threat. The photo will come out in twenty four hours? I dropped the phone on the kitchen island and threw Jupiter a worried look.

“Val, that’s a big accusation. You can’t just throw that out there unless you have…” “I have proof,” I cut in before I could lose my nerve. My hands shook as I grabbed my phone from the nightstand. I opened my gallery and showed them the screenshot. The text message glared back at us in black and white: I wouldn’t advise you to attend the event. It will be raining bullets. Then the laughing emoji. Then another text: Relax, it’s a joke. But was it? Brielle snatched the phone from me and stared at it like it was a ticking bomb. “Holy—Val, this isn’t a joke. This is a threat.”

Not awkward silence. The heavy kind. I swallowed. "And I was threatened again, right after I made this discovery. Like I'm being watched." Maddox’s jaw flexed once. He looked at the papers again, then back at me. I didn’t love saying it out loud. Something about speaking threats made them feel more real. “Unknown number,” I continued. “Same vibe. ‘Stop digging.’ ‘You’re repeating his mistake.’ That kind of inspirational quote.” Maddox’s eyes went cold.

"Do as I say, or you'll regret it!" I would have rejoiced to hear his threats… if I wasn't the only one who heard them. Damn it! I wouldn't be surprised if there was no one else on this entire basement level aside from Caesar and me, and I doubted that any of those surveillance cameras planted on the ceiling recorded sound. Yet, I still needed to try. "You do realize that vocal abuse and threats are against the law, and I can sue you for it?" I strained through my teeth, frowning and hoping he would not discover the fear hidden underneath.

Should I believe him? Of course, sure. With no hesitation, my subconscious gave me a response. "Okay, Samuel, I'm opening my eyes. If anything bad happens to me, you better believe I'll be punching you hard in the shoulder." I gave him a threat. "You are so witty, Scarlet." My warning made him laugh out loud. Huh, what's wrong with this man? I am threatening him, and he is laughing as if I had just told him a joke. I felt his arms encircling my waist forcefully.

The guard gives the gun back to his boss, leaving me helpless once again. The boss now points the gun towards me, "I hate it when someone threatens me, and you know what I hate more?" He asks but I don't respond. "When someone threatens me with my own weapon!" He's pissed. "Any last words?" He asks. "He will kill you!" I whisper. The boss chuckles, putting down the gun, "you'll find out whose getting killed within a few minutes. I'm sure the departed soul will meet you at God's gate" he makes fun of me.