Funny Threats Novels & Stories

is just a threat that can't be refused, but he nodded anyway. "First, I'd drive a car to where the guy is and just ram into him, pushing him once. After breaking some bones, once he regains consciousness, I'd visit him again. Then I'd start the conversation. Or I could simply shoot one of his knees first, that works too." "...Generally, saying you'll ram someone with a car or shoot their knee is considered a threat." "That's what girly guys do. Eugene, threatening means taking action first, then starting."

"Oh, this! Nothing new same as usual, threat for you to leave your CEO position, then they'll let your family free." "A new one, what's the latest count?" "Including this, it reached to four hundred threats, from the day you took over the CEO position. But this one is different." "How?" Curiosity raised in her. "They'll set your house on fire and let your family burn. Which they think is easy, they wish." "This old..." "It's not from that old geezer, our team is tracking it." "Oh! New one, good enough. I'll be bored soon with that old geezer Bao so, I need a toy anyway." ZouMi looked pleased.

He groans dramatically and I just watch him, fuming. “You’re lucky that I have other things planned for you, Vaughn. Or I would have tied you up and gotten five men to cum on your face just to make you pay for doing this shit. And maybe I can be generous enough and ask them to fuck you.” He scoffs, his threat sending chills down my spine. Why does it sound like he will really carry out his threat?

“Well, if we decide to forget about the whole thing, then I’ll scream my head off and have you arrested before you can say ‘Jack Robinson,’ not to talk of before you find your way out of here.” “Is that a threat? I don’t take kindly to threats.” “You can bet your sorry ass it is.” “Well, to burst your bubbles, I have two friends who are sitting right here in this establishment and watching us. Any wrong move from you, and they’ll start shooting, starting with you. They’ll blow your pretty, fat head off before it can finish uttering its first scream, and you know what will happen after that. While everyone is running around in terror and trying not to get shot, I’ll disappear into thin air, n

“Valerie is going to make our lives hell.” I snorted a laugh. “That’s an understatement.” “She’s the least of our worries.” “Then tell me about these threats, so I’d know how to prepare when they come.” He lifted his head to look at me. “Just like that? It doesn’t bother you?”

I thought as annoyance percolated through my reins. "Hey look here man, if it's a joke, it ain't funny at all. Better cut it out before I do something we'll both regret" I said as I tried to suppress the anger from being evident in my voice. He stared at me for a second or two, blinking a bit awkwardly before he suddenly burst out in laughter. Was this guy nuts? He was literally laughing at a threat in the hood! What kind of psycho was this? At this point, I had had enough. "Okay, fuck this" I said as I grabbed him by the collar and stood up with him.

I huffed out an unhumurous laugh. "Baby, one thing you should know about me is that I ain't never scared. You may feign to know or think you know what you're holding, but I can assure you, you don't. I'm not one to take threats lightly, and if I really wanted to, you'd claw out your own throat simply because I said so. Now, you can think this a game if you want to. I can't say I'll always be right..."

I wouldn’t mind shooting myself in the leg but the only person that can make me shoot myself in the leg is Mirable. “I’m going to give you from now till midnight. I don’t care. Once you don’t do what pleases me then I’m going to the media.” She threatened. I chuckled lightly while shaking my head. “You keep shouting at the media all the time. If that’s a threat then make it real. Don’t push me Miriam. You know pushing me doesn’t end well and if you do badly want to go to the media then go there and tell them. The fuck is wrong when you?”

I asked. He growled. “I swear, if you spend even a dime of my money, I will hunt you to the ends of the earth. I will make you wish for death and it will not come fast.” He threatened. For some reason, I was unfazed. I tapped my finger on my lips. “Hmm, does that work on all the people you threaten? It's creative, I'll give you that.” Armani went silent for a moment. “Are you insane? Who exactly are you and how did you find my money?” He asked.

Not because anything was funny. Because it wasn’t. “Then another.” His gaze remained fixed somewhere in the distance. “A few months later there were more.” Death threats. Warnings. Photographs. Promises. At first he ignored them. Successful people received threats all the time. Most were meaningless. Most were made by cowards hiding behind paper and ink. So he hired security. Increased precautions. And eventually convinced himself everything was under control. His voice broke. “It wasn’t.” Silence settled over the room. Edward swallowed hard.