Novel & Cerita Funny Weird Things To Say

After Jacob Locke brings up breaking up with me once again, I don't wait for him to say anything else. I pack up my things and move out on my own, then quietly cut ties with our past. On the first day, I cancel the wedding planner I booked three years ago but kept delaying. On the second day, I turn off the automatic payments for his mother's treatment. I also politely refuse his sister when she reaches out for money. On the third day, I accept my superior's transfer proposal and get ready to settle down in a southern city. The moment I board the plane, I suddenly get curious. Without me, the free housekeeper who hasn't taken a break in the past decade and the always-on ATM, how will Jacob fare? How will he care for his paralyzed mother, deal with his vain sister, and face his precious junior who's the apple of his eye?

The day I died was Mommy’s birthday. For once, she left me an unusually large slice of cake. I hovered before it, greedy, leaning in to breathe in its sweetness. But the very next second, she handed the cake to my younger sister, Bella Tesla. “Have some, Bella. Better you than that ungrateful girl!” Then she turned to Daddy, who was filming nearby. “You recorded everything, right? When she returns, make her watch it. Don’t let her say again that we play favorites! “Of all things to learn, she learned how to run away from home! “We spoiled her! If she has any sense, let her never come back!” She sneered as she slammed the table and cursed at me, never noticing the panic on Bella’s face as she held the cake. She also failed to notice Bella’s disheveled hair. She noticed even less the dark stains of blood on her sleeve. Blood that belonged to me.

Lazing around has never been a bother and, to say, a hindrance to Josh's life. In fact, as far as he believes in, he's already living with it. The only time he felt a bit of excitement was the first time he had discovered his power. However, it only happened once, and it has been five years since then. He's already twenty-two and indifferently considers it as a thing in the past. As he continues his normal life teaching students, he gets acquainted with the teachers in the new faculty he's in; one of whom is Jelly. He also meets a newly-hired teacher who inspires him in a way to become a better version of himself. Things are going well for them—until the day of the student council's retreat. A strange phenomenon hits them, and it changes their lives, permanently. Josh and Jelly are part of the select teachers who embark with the student council for Bantayan, where everything unfolds. They soon find themselves in tight situations and shocking revelations are unearthed as Josh unravels the secrets of his dormant power.

Khalid was catapulted into the mysteries of the world that made him miserable. He has always wished to be normal, of having his own mate and being the best Alpha he could ever dream of. But then, it seemed like his dream was very far from being accomplished. His plans were in pieces, his pain is unbearable and his life is a disgrace. In his quest of finding a solution to all the weird happenings, he meets Megan Zaron. What would he end up doing? Let his heart find the vigor or would rather push away the person who turned out to be his long awaited wish.

Trace a.k.a The Orgy King. The Panty Ripper. His sworn brother called him funny names but he knows what he is. A spawn by Satan. Born to be his father's trouble. He fuck around like a rabbit. Party here and there. But his fave sport will always involve dark and bad. A walking sin. Trace will soon realize that karma really is a bitch*. Organization. Friendship. Brotherhood. Trace Dimagiba might be the most hateful man in FOEDUS CORP., but he’ll soon realize that even the devil himself deserves redemption. In the form of the feisty and beautiful woman who sauntered into his life– Chloe. His light and his end game.

After graduation, I spend a year interning with my mentor, a healer, out in the neutral lands—no packs, no laws, and no one to protect me. My brother, the Lycan Chairman of all werewolves, nearly loses his mind over it. He's terrified I'll fall for some Rogue and impulsively form a reckless mate bond. As such, he handpicks an arranged mate for me—Falcon Sterling, the Alpha of the strongest pack in Northmere. He's handsome and dangerous, a legendary figure. My brother orders me to come home for the mating ceremony, so I have no choice but to go pick out a Luna crown. At the jewelry shop, my eyes snap straight to a crown made of pure silver and covered in diamonds. Just as I reach out to take it, a sharp female voice cuts in. "I like the one she's holding. I'll take it. Hand it over." Before I can react, the clerk snatches the crown right out of my hands, nearly scraping my skin. I straighten up, forcing myself to stay calm. "Ever heard of 'first come, first served?' I saw it first. Is this how you do things here?" The she-wolf slowly turns toward me, casting me a long, mocking look. "This crown costs 300 thousand dollars. You sure you can afford it, peasant? I grew up with the Alpha of the Silvermoon pack, Falcon Sterling. Around here, I make the rules." I stare at her, almost laughing. Isn't that funny? Falcon just happens to be my arranged mate. I pull out my phone and press the call button. "Hey, Falcon. Your adorable childhood sweetheart just stole the Luna crown I'm supposed to wear for the mating ceremony. What do you think I should do about that?"

These are the five things on the list that could bring the spoiled brat named, Iris Gene Rodríguez, privileged life back; First, take public transportation instead of a car when going to the university or when only necessarily leaving the house. Second, no alcohol, no bars, and nightclubs alone and with friends unless you're with the family. Third, look for a job where you can earn money by yourself. A decent one, please. Fourth, don't ditch classes, featuring no sleeping, take studies seriously, and get good grades. And last but definitely not the least, kiss Leon Gael Johansson, the man with a beautiful face, indeed. . . remember, with consent.” The list is only good for two months and needs to be accomplished within the time frame. If he happened to fail, then should Iris forever live the harder way around. The last thing on the list is definitely the tough part, as they also started as enemies. Will Iris become successful with his list? Or will he end up getting hurt amidst accomplishing it that made him say, “You’re the worst, Leon Gael Johansson.”

Tristan Cliff was the only son of his rich parents but he lost them in a plane crash when he was 6. He was adopted by his uncle's family whose only goal was to get hold of Tristan's family fortune. As a result, Tristan was abused constantly. He was very scared of them and agreed to whatever they say just to avoid punishment. He was even bullied by his cousins and his friends at school. Evelyn Grace was an orphan who lived her life in an orphanage. She was a self-dependent and strong-willed girl. She joins the college where Tristan goes to and helps him from the bullies. Evelyn becomes Tristan's savior and they soon become good friends. Tristan falls deeply in love with his savior but can't muster up the courage to confess to her. Things get more complicated for Tristan when another guy Adam gets involved who seems to have taken an interest in Evelyn and is always there for her whenever in need. **** This book can be read as a Standalone ****

Snow Miller was never happy with her life. She never was until she met Ezra in the Ecstasy Land. She felt the happiest with him until she realized that everything has an end and she needs to face the reality sooner or later. Ezra Masterson is a rich ass man. He could get things with just a snap of his fingers; girls, power, fame, you name it, he could have it. Everything was easy and simple for him until he learned how to love and all of his defences crumbled when he discovered that he was pursuing a married woman. --- Ecstasy Land established by Masterson and friends is a secret island in California in which exclusive billionaires pay to live their deepest, darkest desires. A trusted place to play and explore your dirtiest and kinkiest imagination. It is where they met and it is where they will collide. What will happen if Clayton, her husband finds out she's having an affair? They say love conquers all. But how will you fight for a love that is forbidden in the first place?

I knock on the door, heart pounding like it always does when I’m about to see him. “Come in,” Justin’s voice calls—cool, smooth, and frustratingly calm. I take a deep breath and walk in, holding the folder tightly. “Here’s the report you requested, sir.” He doesn’t even glance at me. Just keeps typing, his expression unreadable. “You’re late,” he says without missing a beat. I clench my jaw. “There was a delay at the printer—” “No excuses, Joanna. Just do better next time.” Ouch. Professional and cold. As always. I nod, ignoring the sting in my chest. “Yes, sir.” I turn to leave, gripping the doorknob—just one more second and I’ll be out of this weird tension-filled office— “Wait.” I freeze. I turn around slowly. “Yes?” Justin stands now, walking toward me. In his hand, a familiar brown paper bag. He holds it out. “You didn’t have lunch.” I blink. “I’m fine.” “You skipped breakfast too. Eat.” I hesitate. “What is it?” “Chicken pesto. No onions.” My breath catches. He still remembers? “Why are you doing this?” I ask quietly. He shrugs, not meeting my eyes. “I just… remember things.” My fingers brush his as I take the bag. Warmth. Stupid warmth that shouldn’t still feel this familiar. Then, he looks at me—really looks at me. “You shouldn’t skip meals… wife.” Silence. My chest tightens. “Don’t call me that.” But my voice is too soft to sound convincing. I walk out before I say something I’ll regret. His words echo in my mind like a dangerous lullaby. Cold one second. Kilig the next. God… he’s still him. And that’s exactly the problem.