Hilarious Jokes For Adults

Erin cole had it all, money, power, a penthouse in the sky. But one bad decision turned his world into a nightmare. Now he’s broke, hunted by loan sharks, and desperate to survive. When a strange job poster promises two million for a nanny position, Erin thinks it’s a scam. Instead, it leads him straight to Michele Galetto the most feared mafia boss in the city. Cold, dangerous, and untouchable, Michele is a man everyone fears. But to his young son, he is simply a father in need of help. Erin should run. He should stay far away from this world of guns, blood, and secrets. Yet he stay s. Because he needs the money. Because he needs to breathe. But the longer he stays, the more dangerous it becomes. Not from the mafia. Not from Michele’s enemies. But from the feelings growing between him and the man he should fear most.

Ashton Johnson is a formidable presence, a person who refuses to be controlled. With a strong will, unwavering resilience, and complete accountability, this twenty-two-year-old billionaire alpha male navigates his extraordinary life with ease. Every day brings a flurry of adoring fans, transforming a simple lunch into a chaotic spectacle. By afternoon, his face is plastered all over the internet, capturing the attention of millions. From the moment he was born, Ashton's life was destined for fame and recognition, thanks to his prominent family. He is the epitome of American royalty, carrying the weight of his lineage on his shoulders. However, his world takes an unexpected turn when he is assigned a new bodyguard, someone who will be with him around the clock. This is when Ashton comes face-to-face with his worst fear: being paired with a tattooed, MMA-trained professional who is notorious for disregarding rules within the security team. As if that weren't complicated enough, this bodyguard also happens to fulfill one-third of Ashton's deepest desires. Lennox Burke, twenty-seven years old, has a singular duty: to protect Ashton Johnson at all costs. Anything beyond the realm of strict professionalism, such as flirting, dating, or engaging in intimate encounters, is strictly forbidden and could lead to Lennox's termination. However, when unexpected emotions begin to surface, the task of safeguarding this stubbornly alluring celebrity becomes increasingly complex for Lennox. As their paths intertwine, the boundaries that separate them start to blur, and the consequences of their growing connection could be catastrophic for both of them. The risk of exposure looms large, threatening to upend their lives in unimaginable ways.

My five years of marriage to Elliot Kline turned out to be a cruel joke. "For tomorrow's monthly report meeting, I'd like Yvette to present your branding plan," Elliot said, not looking up from his desk. I put down the files I was organizing, certain I had misheard. "What?" "Yvette just joined the company. She needs a chance to prove herself. Your plan is perfect for that." He lifted his head, his tone brooking no argument. "But that's my entry for the Veriania Creative Competition," I protested. "You win awards every year. What's the harm in letting her have it this time?" He shrugged, adding, "We need to nurture new talent." I stared at the man with whom I had shared a bed for five years. His face suddenly felt so unfamiliar to me. "Do you know how many sleepless nights I poured into that plan? And you're giving it to a new intern?" "Don't be so petty. It's just a plan. My decision is made." My fists clenched, anger surging through me.

I just closed a deal worth 50 million. The room did its job, so I went to the reception to check out, and I got myself a bottle of water worth 2 dollars. That very same day, I got an email from the company accusing me of misusing company funds. They canceled three months' worth of KPI from my records and fined me 5,000 dollars. I ignored that, thinking that it was a mistake some new guy in finance made. When I went to work the next day, my access card was denied. It was canceled. I couldn't even get into the building. Furious, I called my CEO fiance, but his secretary took the call instead. "How many times do I have to tell you to follow the rules when it comes to money? Did you tell finance about that bottle of water? No? Then that's against the rules! Everyone else follows the rules, so why can't you? You're a veteran!" The CEO chimed in, "Christina, you're a veteran of the company. You must be an example. You're not allowed back to work until you finish your 8000-word reflection and read it out loud at the all-employee meeting!" They tossed the phone aside, and a moment later, moans of delight and passion traveled through the air. Stone-faced, I hung up and called our competitor's CEO. "I've got a 50-million-dollar deal and a sales manager who just got fired for you. Are you taking that deal?"

Myan mendapati dirinya terbangun di hamparan padang rumput berbunga yang luas setelah terperosok ke dalam jurang dari tebing yang tinggi, saat mendaki gunung dalam acara kebersamaan karyawan yang diadakan oleh perusahaannya. Masih dalam keadaan bingung, datang seorang pria yang berpenampilan dan berpakaian asing turun dari kuda putihnya. Ia menghampirinya, berlutut di hadapannya, dan mengulurkan tangannya. "Kau Sang Pembebas," ucapnya kemudian. Siapakah dia? Di manakah Myan berada?

On the eve of my engagement banquet, news broke that my fiancé had fathered a child with his mistress, and it spread like wildfire. Before I could confront him, Jayden Ford brushed it off casually. "It was just an accident. Focus on organizing the engagement banquet first. Besides, your dad’s in the late stages of stomach cancer. Calling off the engagement now won’t do either family any good." That night, he skipped the banquet but posted a photo of a swaddled newborn on social media. When I video-called him, he was bottle-feeding the baby. "I’ve been busy taking care of the kid. You know how it is. Our family lineage has always been sparse and dwindling, and the child takes priority." He wiped milk from the baby’s mouth. "But don’t worry. Once he’s a month old, I’ll send him to the overseas. Just show up on holidays and pretend to be his mom. The title of Mrs. Ford will always be yours." I stared at the matching diamond ring on his finger and couldn’t help but laugh. "Jayden, this engagement is off." He scoffed, "You're really throwing a tantrum over something like this? Don’t be so childish." I hung up on him and called his father—Charles Ford—directly. "I heard you’re looking for a new wife? Why not consider me?" I ran a hand over my belly and smiled. "After all, I’ve got a naturally fertile body. I can give you as many sons as you want." So much for being the sole heir. I’ll make sure he has plenty of brothers to keep him company.

Dangerous Desires Book One. I, Zia Walker, take you, Xavier Luciano, to be my wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part. I will honor you all the days of my life. 'And above all, I vow not to fall for you.' ~~ Trapped with the responsibility to my family, fate forced me to marry Xavier Luciano. He was the perfect solution to my problems, but there was only one condition he asked before promising me his ‘I do.’ “Don’t fall for me,” was his unbreakable rule. I laughed at him that day, thinking how easy it is to follow his stupid rule. I’m in love with my ex-fiance, his younger brother Calvin, so what could possibly go wrong? I agreed without hesitation, seeing him as the ticket out of my life’s predicament. Like a raging wave, the realization of my vow’s weight crashed on me. How can I fulfill my promise, when even in the darkness and danger that surrounds him, I’m hauled like a moth to a flame? How can I fight the slow burn of falling for my husband? The man I swore to cherish and adore, until death do us part, and the one my heart chose to love. ~~ [Mature Content] ~~ Follow me on lnstagram Castiel_Lj Cover by DobolyuV

Just because my wolf mom scratched Ava Shaw's favorite dress, Noah Potter called a butcher. He punished her seriously. I found her dying body and screamed at him. "I told you before—I was raised by wolves. What you did to her is no different from killing my mother!" Noah stayed cold. He covered Ava's eyes and stared at me. "You are just a stray kid my stepmom picked up. Stop trying to fool me." My wolf mom was still bleeding as she dragged herself toward me. I crawled to her and held her tight. "I stayed here to repay Noah's family for helping the wolf pack. You chased me for miles because you could not let me go. I never thought I would end up hurting you instead." That night, I held my wolf mom and knelt in front of Aunt Wendy's memorial. "Aunt Wendy, the Potters' Zoo are everywhere now. They do not need my gift anymore. I should leave."

Winter Stevens is a college student visiting her mom for the holidays and for her mom's wedding. She plans to move home from Georgia back to West Virginia after her break-up. Winter is witty and not afraid to speak her mind, especially when it comes to a certain she-wolf. Blake Conners is the future Alpha of the Snowstorm Pack who hasn't found his mate yet. Until he meets Winter. Blake's wolf, Shadow, is already in love with Winter the moment they meet and Blake matches Shadow's love. Blake learns of Winter's family history after following her one day where he will learn of the auburn hair girl who captured his heart as a pup. Secrets will unravel and truths will be told as Winter is confronted by a jealous she-wolf. Will Winter accept Blake once she learns the truth about herself? Dear Readers, I love reading stories of werewolves so I wanted to try my hand at writing a novel. This is not your typical “abused omega” wolf story. I hope you fall in love with the characters as much as I have. I am still currently in the process of writing so please bear with me. My goal is to upload a chapter or two everyday. Please show your support by commenting and sending gifts. Thank you for giving my story a chance <3

In the fifth year of my marriage to Jordan West, he cheats on me with a blind woman. She's young, pretty, and demure. Jordan scours the best hospitals in the country to treat her eyes. In the end, he fixes his gaze on me and tells me he wants me to donate my corneas to her. "They're just a pair of eyes, Hazel. Please help her. Can you really stand by and watch as she withers away?"