Hilarious Jokes For Adults

I breathe heavily as he pins me to the wall, his hands wrapped tight around my throat I could barely breathe. ‘You hear me, Sera? I found you first. I noticed you first! I fell for you first. No one else, I mean, no one should put their hands on you, because if they do, I swear to God, Sera, I'll fucking break their arms and legs and serve it to you to eat!’ He growls. Seraphina Puckett is the perfect definition of trauma. A walking trauma. She tries to navigate her life, trying to bring in sunshine but as the world is determined to make it rain on her, what does she do? Does she get beaten in the rain or walk through it? When her abusive father gets out of prison and is out to get her, how does she face her fear?

​The first rule of heartbreak: don't lose your dignity. ​Too late. She caught her fiancé in bed with her twin sister. Then, she drowned the pain in alcohol… and woke up naked beside a gorgeous stranger. Lauren Hill swore off men forever; her new vow was to focus on herself. But fate clearly had other plans. Less than two hours after her walk of shame, she stepped into Moore Technologies to start her new job, only to find her one-night stand sitting behind the CEO's desk. ​Colt Moore is a billionaire CEO: gorgeous, demanding, and engaged to someone else. Lauren is done with love, and Colt is totally off-limits, but their chemistry is impossible to ignore. What's going to happen when a life-changing truth ties them together, threatening to wreck everything — Colt’s company, her fresh start, and her guarded heart? ​Will she risk her heart for a man engaged to another? ​Or will he destroy her to protect his empire?

Yvonne always believed in happily-ever-afters, until her ex spectacularly dumped her at his workplace on what was supposed to be a special day, leaving her heartbroken and humiliated. Then, a mysterious man swoops in to save the day. Little does she know, this charming rescuer is the father of the adorable twins she teaches. The twins, intent on finding a mommy, see their father as a bonus. As fate would have it, this dashing single dad has an unconventional proposal on behalf of his children. They want Yvonne to be their mommy, and he comes as an irresistible bonus. With twin-sized mischief and unexpected romance, Yvonne's life takes a hilariously unpredictable turn. Will she find her own fairy tale ending in the arms of the man she never saw coming?

Completed-----She felt good—better than Zander Stanton remembered, and he had a damn good memory when it came to this woman. But his hatred was more pronounced than the little voice in his head telling him to give her what she wanted—his love. But Elvie had never been the one for Zander. He loathed her. He hated her family for arranging a marriage he never wanted. Yet she had no choice, and a day hadn’t gone by when she hadn’t replayed memories of the man who’d captured her heart without trying. Here she was, just as stupid as she remembered. "I—I'll take a shower, and I'll be b-back." She muttered and left his room immediately. This was her goodbye; tonight, Zander would be hers. And she would set him free forever. Five years later, with amnesia and a missing four-year-old daughter, could fate play her again, or was she willing to quench his desperate thirst for her love?

Eri Sunville, an intelligent and hardworking female who needs to earn enough for her sister's surgery. She needs any job she can get at any moment and so when she gets the job as a secretary to famous and arrogant multi billionaire, Don Jones, she finds herself having to keep up with his behavior to earn for the surgery. Don Jones, an arrogant yet strikingly handsome CEO who cares about nothing else but the success of his company and will be getting married to his fiancee who has been kept anonymous to stir up the media. --- "Why are you late?" A deep and cold voice called. I had not even noticed the man sitting on the chair in front of the table that lay close to the wall. I stared at him and my goodness, was this how handsome Don Jones was. Nobody told me he was this hot. He had well defined jawlines, a prominent nose and high cheekbones that made me wonder how on earth a man could been so damn gorgeous. He had smooth and straight black hair that fell on his forehead. I only realized I had been staring at his full and perfectly shaped black eyebrows when they furrowed to form a frown. I stared at his eyes and he held my gaze with those devilish dark blue eyes.

Virginia and her best friend Mariana find an unconventional way to change their lives and fulfill their dreams: They put their virginity up for auction. When Virginia receives an offer of one million reais, she doesn't think twice about handing over her only "asset" to the highest bidder. What she doesn't expect is that fate will play a trick on her, and what was supposed to be a simple business deal will turn into a torrid night of pleasure with unpredictable consequences.

Artist Selena Chase unintentionally did something unforgivable to Dr. Cassandra York. That intimidating woman wanted to hear nothing from her but one No or two No's won't stop her. She knew how to get her attention and that was by booking an appointment! There was no way that the doctor would refuse a 'patient'. What she thought would be a normal session turned into a steamy one and nothing remained the same after that.

What would you do if Mr Dark and Frosty crashed right into your life and made you question everything you thought you knew? Jackson Hayes has always played it safe. Straight-A student, part-time bookstore job, perfect son with his entire life planned in detail. He dates girls because he's supposed to, never understanding why he felt no form of attraction towards them. Then he witnesses a hit-and-run on Christmas Eve. The stranger he pulls from the road shouldn't be alive. The gash on his head heals in hours. His body is ice cold. He's gorgeous, intense and has zero memory of who is and why he was left bleeding in the snow. But the moment their hands touch, Jackson feels something he's never felt before—a heat that terrifies and thrills him at the same time.

Arda is a normal human girl who dreams of settling down after school and raising children with a nice loving boy. Just when her dream starts to come true, she unexpectedly discovers that she is marked by the moon and fated to marry Gillow, a ruthless and dominant werewolf vampire, in fulfillment of a prophecy that concerns mankind. --------- EXCERPT --------- PS: If any male asks you out, tell him that you're already taken because, you belong to me and I will mate you at the right time. I am The Alpha you will soon get to know. Can she run away from her destiny?

Desperate to save her mother, Sophia sells her virginity to the highest bidder—only to discover he’s Alpha Allan, the son of the reigning Alpha she’s secretly loved for years. Bound to serve him, she must navigate desire, betrayal, and heartbreak. But when love isn't returned, can she reclaim her heart, or will she be able to get the powerful Alpha to fall crazily in love with her?