I Don''t Want To Be Loved Novels & Stories

"I don't know." “I just don’t love you anymore and all I want now is to be freed from this curse. I just want to feel human again.”

This may not be tonight, tomorrow, or the next day, but everything is going to be okay. Now let me tell you a story of a man so lost and incomplete that he dwelled for years in trying to find that one thing that he eluded him so, love. The man that tells you that they do not desire to experience love and not be love in return is not only a liar and a fool. The craving to be loved is a desire that every man wants. I have that love for Jenna, and I know that she has that love for me. We can overcome all of this; we need to be strong.

Familiar, but not stagnant. After dinner, we sat on the couch, legs tangled, the window open to let the city breathe around us. “I realized something while you were gone,” I said. She looked up at me. “What?” “I don’t want to be loved because I’m stable or safe or reliable,” I continued. “I want to be loved because I’m choosing you every day consciously, freely.” She swallowed. “I don’t want to be loved because I stay,” she said. “I want to be loved because I return.”

"No, this is not because of Michael." This is about us. We haven't understood each other for a long time. I need the freedom to find myself. "Nayla, I love you!" I have worked hard to maintain this marriage. No! I will not get divorced! "I know, Zav." I know you have tried. But we can't force this feeling. I also love you, but as a friend. Not as a husband. Aren't you going to get married? You will become Sefia's husband."

"Feeling used but I'm still missing you And I can't see the end of this Just wanna feel your kiss against my lips And now all this time is passing by But I still can't seem to tell you why It hurts me every time I see you Realize how much I need you I hate you, I love you I hate that I love you I don't want to but I can't put Nobody else above you I hate you, I love you I hate that I want you You want her, you need her And I'll never be her......." (Note:"I Hate U, I Love U" is a song by American singer and rapper Gnash featuring American singer Olivia O'Brien. It was released on February 17, 2016)

He looks at me assessingly for a moment and comments, "You must have had a really bad break up at some point." "No, I've never been in a relationship. I have no desire to be in love anytime soon. Maybe when I get older, but right now I know for sure that it's the last thing I want," I explain. He analyzes my expression for a moment then nods. He must see that this is make or break for me so he nods and says, "Done."

Like he was walking on broken glass. What did I want? The question echoed in the hollow space inside me. I wanted him. I’d always wanted him. But wanting him was like wanting the moon – beautiful, impossible, and guaranteed to leave you cold and alone in the dark. Wanting him got me branded ‘Beta Reject’. Wanting him got me Loveth’s vicious attention. Wanting him right now, after *that* kiss, felt like stepping off a cliff.

I don't want this kind of love! I don't!!

"We have four weeks left." "I know." "And a dinner with his father tomorrow that I'm already dreading." "I know that too." She leaned on the counter. "Mara. What do you actually want. Not what's practical. Not what the contract says. What do you want." I didn't answer because the answer was sitting right there and I wasn't ready to say it out loud in the bakery my mother built where everything still smelled like her and felt like her and made every feeling I had feel louder than it was supposed to be.

She wondered if any of them were still out there, living stories she hadn’t finished. Raegan pulled out her phone and opened her Notes app. The cursor blinked at her, patient and expectant. For a moment, she hesitated, fingers hovering. Then she typed: This is not love, not the kind I dreamed of. This is staying quiet to keep someone from leaving. This is setting myself on fire just to light the way for them. She stopped, heart racing. Her throat tightened. It wasn’t much. It wasn’t polished or gentle or safe. But it was hers.