Mommy Milker Jokes

It had been five years since my mate Ethan Blackwood secretly marked me. Then his brother, the Alpha of the Shadow Moon Pack, died in the territorial war. To become the next Alpha of Shadow Moon, Ethan inherited everything his deceased brother left behind. Including his widowed sister-in-law, Victoria. After every time Ethan shared Victoria's bed, he would hold me close and whisper reassurances: "Autumn, just wait a little longer. Once Victoria gets pregnant, we'll have our Mating Ceremony!" This was the pack's only requirement for him to inherit the Alpha position. In the six months since returning to Shadow Moon territory, Ethan had gone to Victoria's chambers countless times. From once a month in the beginning, to now almost every other day. Finally, after countless nights of sitting alone until dawn, news came that Victoria was pregnant. But along with this announcement came another—Ethan and Victoria would be holding their Mating Ceremony. "Mommy, is someone having a Mating Ceremony here?" my daughter asked. I looked around at the stark contrast to our sparse living quarters. The main hall was filled with flowers and balloons. People bustled about outside, everyone joyfully preparing for their Mating Ceremony. I pulled my innocent daughter into my arms: "Yes, sweetheart. Your father is having a Mating Ceremony with someone he loves, which means it's time for us to leave." Ethan didn't know that we wolves of the Silver Crescent Pack never cared about so-called Mating Ceremonies. In Silver Crescent, female wolves were revered. My mother was the current Alpha, and I only needed to bear an heir to the pack to inherit her position. I dialed a number I hadn't called in five years: "Mother, I already have an heir now. I'm ready to come home and claim your Alpha position."

Tak ada yang istimewa dari hidup seorang Wulan, selain paras cantik dan otak cerdas. Hidup tanpa figur seorang Ibu, Wulan diperlakukan tidak baik oleh sang Bibi yang menumpang di rumahnya. Terdesak kebutuhan hidup, ketika sang Ayah jatuh sakit, Wulan terpaksa pergi ke kota untuk mengadu nasib. Dan di sanalah segalanya bermula. Semua berawal dari bertemunya Wulan dengan seorang pewaris hotel berbintang, bernama Askarion. Seorang cassanova impian para kaum hawa. Tak sengaja menjadi saksi mata kebejadan seorang Rion, membuat Wulan terjerat pada laki-laki itu. Tak akan mudah melepaskan diri dari Rion, sebab Rion telah melingkarkan tali emasnya di leher Wulan. "Aku tau hidupmu susah. Cukup jadi menantu untuk orang tuaku, maka semua yang kamu inginkan akan aku kabulkan." __Askarion__ Akan tetapi, itulah titik awal kacaunya hidup Wulan. Setelah menikah dengan Rion, Wulan harus tahan banting dengan kehidupan yang berputar di istana Mahendra. Persaingan para kakak ipar, intrik para anggota keluarga untuk mendapatkan tahta. Semua terus menekan Wulan, agar ikut terlibat di dalamnya. Belum lagi kelakuan Rion yang tak pernah berubah, bermain dengan para barbie mainannya. Bagaimana Wulan harus mengatasi cinta yang tumbuh di tengah kemelut yang terjadi? Ketika hadir orang-orang dari masa lalu, akankah mampu membuat Rion sadar akan cintanya pada Wulan? Sebab cinta yang berawal dari uang dan materi, kini berubah menjadi sebuah obsesi yang menuntut sebuah pencapaian.

My husband did not love me, and he certainly did not love our child. On the day our son was born, he did not even glance at him. He merely tossed him into my arms. Then, his first love came back from overseas. That night, the ever-cold Henry had gotten drunk for the first time. He even smiled as he held our child in his arms. Delighted, our son wrapped his little arms around my husband's neck and asked me in a soft voice, “Mommy, what’s wrong with Uncle?” I crouched down, pulling him into my embrace. My eyes reddened as I explained, “Uncle's favorite person came back, so we shouldn’t bother him anymore. We’re going to find a new home.”

When three people meet each other by chance a romance knocks them on their ass. ~Casey~ A 21 year old virgin working in one of the hottest night clubs in town. She may seem innocent but deep down she is a psycho who enjoys torturing people. She's never been touched by a man and she's killed the ones that have tried. She loves her only remaining family, her older sister Carrie. She has trust issues and a foul mouth. Can she find someone to match her crazy? ~Lincoln~ A 20 yr old street racer with a rough past. He is a bisexual, submissive with some masochistic tendencies. He's gorgeous and catches a lot of attention from both sexes. His cheating ex doesn't won't leave him alone almost borderline harassment. He jokes to hide the pain he bares every day. See how his life changes when he bumps into a little waitress. How will he react to a sexy, possessive man trying to gain his affections and encourage a little woman's psychotic tendencies? ~Malachi "Psycho" Sokolov~ He's a 23 yr old torture expert. He's well known in the underground and with the mafia families for using his pack of dogs during his interrogations. To the public he's a businessman, owning several nightclubs, a couple restaurants and some miscellaneous businesses. He is also bisexual and has had only a few lovers that can handle his bedroom habits. No one has really caught his attention until he sees a young man arguing with one of his staff and a new waitress that's as sweet as can be with little bit of fire and crazy. Find out if their love blooms or burns.

For seven years, Grace has been the dutiful "moon goddess" at the side of Alpha King Ethan Silver, enduring his indifference while desperately trying to strengthen the weakening MATE bond between them. On her birthday, she returns to the eastern territories only to find her home empty - her partner absent and her daughter, whom she brought up as a child, estranged. "I've got something going on here, tomorrow." Ethan's impatient voice came over the phone, but Grace caught another female voice in the background. Olivia Stone. Her half-sister. "Aunt Liv is so handsome, I love Aunt Liv so much, why is mommy so annoying." She heard her daughter Emma complain. The truth becomes irrelevant when Grace finds Ethan and Olivia in an intimate embrace in his office. The mate bond she tried so hard to defend meant nothing to him. "Who gave you permission to come in here!" Ethan's expression was justified, and Grace stood rigid, the coffee tray trembling in her hands. Determined to leave them and rebuild her work and her life, Grace ditches the Silver family and her position at pack medical to return to her roots as a therapist and reconnects with her former partner, Dominic Hayes. As Grace rebuilds her life and professional standing, Ethan begins to notice her absence. But is it too late? Grace has awakened to the fact that she doesn't want to be his Luna anymore. Can she truly sever the seven-year mate bond? And what happens when Ethan finally realizes what he's lost?

Isang buwan pagkaraang mawala ang ina ni Abbey ay natagpuan niya ang sariling bumib'yahe patungo sa Wulfgrim para hanapin ang taong tinutukoy sa sulat na iniwan ng Mommy niya bago ito tuluyang pumanaw. While on her way to finding the truth, she then met Luc Deriston Montego. Ang lalaking napagkamalan niyang si San Pedro na tagabantay ng pintuan ng langit sa una nilang pagkikita. Sa pagtatagpo nila ni Luc, matagpuan din kaya ni Abbey ang hinahanap o mapapahamak siya sa kamay ng lalaki? Paano kung sa gitna ng panganib ay matagpuan niya ang sariling nakakulong sa mga bisig nito? At, paano kung kasabay ng pagtuklas niya sa bagong sibol na damdamin ay matuklasan din niyang malaki ang kaugnayan nito sa pinagmulan niya? Ano ang gagawin ni Abbey? Handa ba siyang sumugal sa ngalan ng pag-ibig?

Age is just a number. Or at least that's what Maxwell Cooper thinks whenever he hits on his best friend's mother, Amanda, who is very much divorced and extremely attractive in his eyes. Amanda, highly aware of the obvious infatuation that Maxwell has on her, tries to avoid his advances towards her given their conflicting age differences. She speculates that Maxwell's attraction towards older women is deeply rooted to fact that he might just have some 'Mommy issues'. Maxwell refutes the hypothesis by claiming that he's only attracted to her , not older women in general. Both are put to the test when Amanda , returning from yet another failed date one night, runs into Maxwell who notices the tears in her eyes and proceeds to comfort her. This leads to her inviting her to her house which would be a convenient move seeing as Zac, Maxwell's best friend and Amanda's son, had gone to visit his father in New York for the weekend, leaving her alone for the weekend. They end up sharing a bottle of wine, getting drunk while reminiscing on the simpler days. A kiss is shared during the vulnerable moment between these two, which would lead to regrets and broken friendships.

My husband doesn't love me or our daughter. It's been six years since she was born, but he's never held her. The doctors say he has an emotional disorder, and that he doesn't know how to express the way he feels. But when his true love returns, he smiles at us for the first time. He even brings our daughter a gift. I think it's because he's finally seen sense… until she and I see the photo he uses as his phone's wallpaper. In it, his eyes are crinkled as he smiles. He has one arm around a little girl whose front tooth is missing, and he holds his true love's hand with the other. My daughter tugs on my hand, and her eyes redden. "Mommy, do you think we should leave? Should we give Daddy three final chances? Let's leave him if he still doesn't want us after that."

We all know how it ends, the story of the sexy cheerleader and the captain of the football team. But this is different. Every cheerleader always dates every guy on the football team it is a "high school achievement". You know how it feels to walk down the hall and have all eyes on you, most of them envy you, some wish they were you, some wants your man and the few just would stop at nothing to drag you down. Well that's a "high school challenge" one way or the other student see school as a battle field in other to meet up with the high status, keeping up appearances, expressing themselves and getting high. Keeping up good grades is only secondary. PROM, PROM, PROM, that's what's on every girls mind and it will be embarrassing when your girls ask "who are you going with" and you say "with no one", "that's a high school walk of shame". High school is like a bed you lay. You can choose how you want to lay it, what matters is you lie on it eventually. By The story of the sexy cheerleader and the captain of the football team are just like the fairy tale story of Cinderella and her prince charming but the question is, does every story end up like that? Still, standing at the far end of the hallway was a simple introvert, trying to cook up the courage to say one word to her. He could see her laugh at her friends jokes, but can she SEE him?

“He is my weakness; I am his.” “Hatred lives in the heart of the wounded and broken soul. Acceptance mends it.” In the world of beast, where justice is voiceless, and life is meaningless, Leona fight for her life and her freedom. Let the truth be heard. Accused of a crime she did not commit, Leona was forced to leave her pack and seek sanctuary in another world where she only heard from her Mama Thelma’s story, the world where her kind exists, the humans. But living a peaceful life seems very elusive for her. She found herself entangled with a man she only met with the agreement her Mommy Rose concerted. Running away from her past, Leona must face again the beast she despises now kindles her heart. To build the future, the past must be settled.