Never Knew What I Needed Novels & Stories

Something was wrong. I just didn’t know what it was yet.

I didn't even know what I was searching for. But I'd know it when I found it. I had to.

This wasn't what I wanted. I needed to know the truth.

I told her the things that I didn't even know I was holding in, and that was when I realized it. I needed help.

For the first time in my entire life, I didn’t know what to do next. Who to go to. Who to ask for help.

I’d barely made it past three intersections before the sickening realization hit me like a brick to the chest. I didn’t even know where she lived. I slowed to a stop at a red light, staring blankly ahead as the city blurred into meaningless shapes. Concrete. Metal. Movement. None of it mattered. None of it could drown out the weight in my chest. I had all the resources in the world, access to information most men could only dream of, and yet I didn’t know the one thing I needed right now. Where the hell was she?

“I don’t know the spaces you’re in. I hear about things after. Or I see them online. And I have to just… accept it.” “You don’t have to just accept anything.” “Then what do I do?” I ask. There it is. The real question. He walks closer. Stops in front of me. “Tell me what you need.” I almost laugh. Because I don’t know. “I don’t know,” I say. And it feels like failure. Because I should. I should know what I need if I’m going to ask him to give it to me. Sunny drops down between us. Completely unbothered.

pulled the box out from under the bed opened it, and held it . . . but nothing more. I put it out of my mind as always and ended up at Handy’s Pawn and Thrift, for no reason at all. After a little conversation with an eccentric but well-meaning shopkeeper, there I was, halfway convinced if I returned to The Motor Lodge I’d finally put my .38 to use. are you looking for something we all know what we want not what we need Standing on the sidewalk, staring at nothing, the weight of my life loomed. I had no idea what I wanted. If I was honest with myself, I had no clue what I needed, either. For the first time in a long time, I had no idea what to do next.

This was strange. I needed to feed.