Oscar The Grouch Quotes Novels & Stories

These crapsters brought the worst out of me. “Ho ho ho. Hear the Queen of Immaturity speak,” Jax hissed. “Better than smelling the poopy Vulture King,” I hissed back. “Dirty Goblin” “Dumb Pig” “Potty Mouth” “Barbaric Caveman” “Basic Bitch” “Clothes Whore” “Hey ! I am just an OCS- Over Compulsive Shopper,” Jax protested. “Clothes Whore,” Kai and I deadpanned. “Your moral compass is on fire,” Jax huffed.

As Oscar’s loud growl echoed across the hall, Jeffrey plastered a wicked smile across his face. He looked at Charlie and mocked, “Uh oh, Uncle Oscar is here. You’re so dead, loser! Even the gods can’t save you now!” Then, he turned to Oscar, pointed at Charlie, and complained, “Uncle Oscar, there’s a loser here who’s not only pretending to be a member of this club but is also being disrespectful to Miss Moore. You must teach him a lesson!”

The little sweetheart of a lady tottered down the aisle, faced the congregation, and said, "I outlived the buggers." Memorable Quotes "Scattered showers my ass!" Noah. "I have no problem with you talking to yourself as long as it doesn't turn into an argument" Woody Allen. "If at first you don't succeed try, try again. Then quit. There's no point being a damn fool about it." W.C.Fields. "The one thing that all porn stars have in common is a dread of filming the scenes that don't involve sex" Fanny Lightfoot (Porn Movie Director) "For every human problem, there is a solution that is simple, neat, and wrong." H. L. Mencken

I turned to look at him, exhaling rapidly before I talked. “I know he won't make that mistake of attacking first again. And if he plans to, we act on the famous quotes.” I said as I took a deep breath, wiping my face with my palm. “What famous quote are you talking about?” He asked as his eyes were opened widely, raising an eyebrow and looking rather curious. I smirked a little, tilting my head to face the direction of the crib of my baby. “Never interrupt your enemies when they are making a mistake,” I said slowly as if I were counting my words as they came out of my mouth. I adjusted on the bed, leaning forward a bit as I exhaled rapidly. Lucas took a deep breath as he licked his lips.

Gigi warned as she moved out of the doorway and into the hall. “He’ll be in a better mood once he’s surrounded by a bunch of seamen again.” Helen said as she came through the doorway. “Hey, you do you.” Gigi laughed. “Har, har.” Reese replied dryly as he searched for Bob Ross quotes. “Happy little mistakes. Make a bird. Fall like a waterfall. What the hell.” “What are you looking at?” his wife asked as she sat on his leg. “Dean gave me a hint for the zombie.”

“Oh. Uh. Morning.” “Oscar,” I said, nodding. “Glad you could make it. Ready to go beat them down in the boardroom?” It was supposed to be a rallying cry. I meant it to be one. But Oscar physically flinched, as if I had shouted at him or something. “Sure,” he said into his chest. “Alright.”

Oscar kept yapping behind me, then broke free and charged in. He sauntered to the center. "Hey, everyone! I'm Oscar Kaufman. Hoping you guys will give me a shot at your company. My abilities are exceptional. You won't be disappointed!" Silence ensued. Then bursts of laughter rippled through the crowd, their faces full of scorn. "Hire me, and I'll blow your profits through the roof!" he added. They just treated him like a clown, brushing him off. Not ready to give up, he tried again, "Here's my resume. Please take a look."

Oscar’s face falls. “Oh, god, look at me. I’m so sorry. That is just tragic,” Oscar says. “Let me make it up to you by making another cocktail…” “…or food,” Anna says. Oscar nods. “I was so nervous about coming here that I didn’t eat all day and my stomach is hurting right now,” “Well, we can’t have a damsel in distress. Let me warm up some soup for you. There’s some creamy butternut soup,” Oscar tells her.

Bookshelves lined the walls, their shelves filled with a vast collection of knowledge and wisdom. Harley Louis leaned casually against the window, a mischievous glint in his eye. "Let me tell you," he began, his voice alive with animated chatter. "Those old geezers in the Granger family are something else. The moment they caught sight of you returning, I swear, they were spewing curses under their breaths."

I say with a smile. Enzo crawls closer to Oliver and I only see Oliver making a face. “Damn Enzo, this way you’re going to intoxicate your brothers, mom, dad, and the neighborhood, it’s just not as stinky as your mom, but damn, you’re getting there, you’re going to be a mini Dinosaur,” Oliver speaks and Enzo doesn't care, as he smiles and farts again. “That’s right, son, it’s insulting,” I say it is amusing.