Random Funny Phrases

What are the odds that you are dared to send a random text to a stranger? And, what are the odds that the stranger happens to be someone you would never have imagined in your wildest fantasies?Well, the odds are in Chloe's favor. A text conversation which starts as a dare takes a one eighty degree turn when the person behind the screen turns out to be the cockiest, most arrogant, annoying asshat. Despite all this; the flirting, the heart to heart conversations and the late night musings are something they become accustomed to and something which gradually opens locked doors...but, that's not all. To top it all off, the guy just might happen to be in the same school and have a reputation for a overly skeptical identity..."What are you hiding?""An awesome body, beneath these layers of clothing ;)"But, who knows what Noah is really hiding and what are the consequences of this secret?Cover by my girl @messylilac :)❤️

"120 million, going, going," the auctioneer announced, a proud smile gracing my face as I became Jaylen's dollar price doll. The smile faded the moment I heard, "200 million," some random young man raised his number with a smirk on his face from the other side of the hall, I guess this person was trying to challenge Jaylen but this wasn't the time for that. Kylie Candace Kazimir is one of the highest paid assassins but what happens when she is given a job by an anonymous person to eliminate one of the youngest, most successful and notorious mafia lords, Jaylen Noire Adryan. How will this one job affect her life? who gave her this Job and why? let's watch and see how Kylie will manage to pull this off or will she?

On day two of Matthew's so-called business trip, I was wiping down the counter when I said, "Auri, play some music." Instead of music, a syrupy voice chirped, "Sure thing, my Baby Moon. Oh, and Matthew, don't forget Bibi's birthday surprise tonight." I froze. The speaker blasted some random playlist, but all I heard was 'Bibi.' Matthew Kein was my husband. So who the hell was Bibi? I called him. "Did you mess with our smart speaker?" A beat of silence, then his fake laugh. "Oh, a buddy dropped by. Probably logged his account in. Why?" I laughed back like I bought it, then hung up. Two taps later, I was scrolling the login history, already hailing a cab to the company tied to that mystery account.

Two months into my cold war with Sean, the lover he’d been keeping finally danced her way right up to me, the real deal. Everyone expected me to react the same way I always had before, kicking up a huge scene to stake my claim. Instead, I looked at the intimate photos of Sean and her in the group chat, smiled, and sent them my blessing. [Looking good. Wishing you two a long and happy life.] The chat went dead silent. Sean must’ve sobered up from his little paradise because in the middle of the night, he drove home and pounded on my door. He was furious. “Do you think this is funny?” However, I only met his gaze calmly. “Honestly, after all these years, none of it is.”

Readers said. 'Very funny, I needed cold showers! I dropped my tablet in the bath! Totally original. Outrageous. The goddesses thread is totally original.' Goddesses - is this what 50 Shades should have been about? Connie Grimshaw, is now a successful businesswoman in an international consultancy. She reached these dizzy heights by believing her mother - work hard and reject emotional needs. On a business trip, the dam bursts and her libido refuses to be silenced. Her PA (Dee) helps her reconcile her lascivious feelings by using a series of parables from ancient goddesses. This works until the goddesses land her in hilarious, embarrassing and sometimes, dangerous situations as she develops the vamp in herself. But there are forces at work, which try to mismanage her feelings. Can she defeat the bad boys? Firstly, she has to deal with Greg, the evil misogynist.

Wisps of smoke escaped his fine lips. “Spread your legs.” The rod of his cane felt cold against my skin. I shivered, my lips frozen under the weight of his blazing gaze. “Obey! Sweetheart.” He roared, and I parted the guards of my secret alley for him. Serving him the best appetite for tonight. ……. One day while she was rushing to bakery to get a cake with customised apology on it to patch up with her boyfriend. Bella hit into a man, with steely blue eyes, showing no affection but fear. She didn’t hesitate to grab him by the collar and make him pay. Her confidence crushed when reality struck her hard in the privacy of his room. And the random man he hit into turned out to the dad of her ex. Yet it was too late to save her fate.

I had just gotten home when a parent in my son’s class group chat erupted: [Ms. Zinn, what kind of place are you running? Do you let just any random stray off the street become a teacher?] [My daughter came home, grabbed two forks, and tried to jump off the balcony. She said it was Miss Never who told her to!] The homeroom teacher panicked and denied it at once, insisting there was no such person as Miss Never at the kindergarten. She even posted the official teaching schedule in the chat to prove it. On the security footage, there was not a single trace of this so-called Miss Never. However, later, my son whispered to me in secret, “Mom, Miss Never is an old lady with a cat’s face.” “She says only kids can see her.”

I went skiing alone on Valentine’s Day to clear my head. I never expected that later that night, my younger brother, Mason Cases, would show up after running away from home following a fight with our family. The front desk stopped him and asked for additional registration. I explained, "He’s my brother. He ran out after an argument and didn’t bring his ID. He’s just staying one night. I’ll take him home tomorrow." After hearing that, the receptionist, Riley Rowe, gave us a suggestive once-over, winking at my brother with a look that said, "I get it." "Alright," she said with a flirty smile. "It’s Valentine’s Day. I understand. No need to be shy." Seeing how exhausted Mason looked, I forced myself to swallow the disgust and brought him upstairs. That night, I came across a local post online. "Girls these days have no shame. Bringing some random guy back to a hotel on Valentine’s Day. She got caught and still had the nerve to lie, saying he’s her brother. Like I can’t tell?" Some users questioned whether she might have mistaken them. "I’ve worked in this industry for over ten years. There’s no way I got it wrong! She didn’t dare register him. Obviously, she’s afraid her husband will find out she’s cheating! I’m going to go listen outside their door later and livestream how loud she gets!" I froze. It couldn’t be that much of a coincidence, right? Until I opened the photo she had secretly taken. My blood turned to ice. That was me. Wait. The "random guy" she was talking about… Did she mean the one lying on the floor? But he really was my biological younger brother.

When Gwyneth opened her eyes, she found herself in a webnovel she had just binge-read, and she wasn’t just a random character—she was the villain’s mother! In the story, after the tragic death of her first husband, the original owner of her body had swiftly moved on and snagged a perfect new partner, only to heartlessly cast aside her son from the first marriage, worrying he would become a burden. Now armed with knowledge of the impending plot twists and the looming shadows of her future villain son, Gwyneth glanced at her surprisingly alive first husband and groaned. With the script she had been dealt, she'd rather face a dragon than revamp this narrative! She was determined to rewrite her destiny, but how could she escape this villainous fate?

My husband, Jared Smith, let me take his spot for a highland vacation. After I departed, I found out that I won a random lottery that I had bought before for $50 million. In order to not delay the redemption of the lottery ticket, I took a red-eye flight back home and wanted to share the news with Jared. Before I went into the house, I heard his smug laugh. “That jacket belongs to Sammy, I’m sure! That dumb witch has been eaten by a bear! I’m so glad that Penny and I sent her on that trip.” It just so happened that the tour group chat sent a video of a member being eaten by a brown bear. My jacket was bloody. However, I was not the one who had been wearing that jacket. It had been his lover, Penny Lee.